Intro

It's easy, when you grew up with trauma, to go unconscious in relationships. Even though you feel like things are fine and you tell everyone things are fine – a big part of you has left the building. There are a number of reasons this happens – but it’s usually a mix of abuse or neglect from the past – where you taught yourself to DENY that you’re unsafe – and a fear of facing reality in PRESENT time because you’re terrified of how you will ever live if the relationship ends. My letter today is from a man I’ll call Chris, and he writes:

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