Countdown with Keith Olbermann

A-Block (1:44) SPECIAL COMMENT: It is amazing but true: the coverage of the Biden document story by Fox News has been more restrained and responsible than has CNN’s. The desperate attempt to position the Think Tank Papers story  as one that - in the words of a CNN commentator - "almost exonerates" Trump, continued last night. The raw numbers are startling: between 5 and 11 PM ET Monday, MSNBC gave the story 14 minutes, Fox News gave it 29 minutes, and CNN gave it 107 MINUTES. Three and a half times as much as Fox! And the worst perpetrator of CNN’s willingness to literally lie to its viewers has been Anderson Cooper. The first words out of his mouth last night were how quote “President Biden’s first public statement on the classified documents uncovered at his former private office” were 'breaking news.' I suggested in real time that if Cooper had any remaining self-respect he would quit before his program was over. He didn't. He doesn't. There is much more than money to what CNN's new fascist troika - Chris Licht, David Zaslav, and John Malone - is doing. This is the Clinton-Lewinsky night-after-night brainwash play: convince America that if Biden is not guilty, Trump is not guilty. And having sold their souls, they will keep pushing this as long as we don't stop them. B-Block (18:45) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Poor Mike Pompeo couldn't get anybody to blurb his book so he had to do it himself. He competes with a climate denier who insists if we reinstate wind power we will automatically reinstate The Atlantic Slave Trade, and the nimrods like Tomi Lahren who complained that Ukraine's president went to Hollywood for the Golden Globes last night - even though he didn't. (23:58) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL No. 1: The perfidy of using cable news to brainwash didn't start with Chris Licht. I was there the day the Chairman of GE was ready to shut down MSNBC because his Mommy the Bill O'Reilly fan believed her son was building IEDs to kill America because Fox told her so. C-Block (41:55) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL No. 2: My first experience with the ad salesmen who pretend to be cable's journalistic decision-makers came even before my first MSNBC show in 1997. That's when the big meeting with the man Microsoft thought shared editorial control of MSNBC was to meet with me, and NBC's execs were worried about only one thing: how effectively I ignored him.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 109: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: We're really doing "But Hillary's Emails" again, huh, CNN? Huh, NBC? Huh, CBS? Huh, New York Times? Huh, Washington Post? THE HELL WE ARE. CBS's website broke the story accurately ("Documents MARKED classified...found at Biden's think tank") and then Norah O'Donnell dropped the caveats and mitigations and tarted the story up. The Post bothsidesed and whataboutismed the Biden story, invoking Trump in the subhead. The Times comped Trump in Paragraph 5. And worst of all, an hour after CNN broke a genuinely important story: Special Counsel Jack Smith subpoenaing Rudy Giuliani in the Trump Post-Election "Save America PAC" Fundraising crimes, what did Anderson Cooper lead with? His network's own, important, resonating scoop? Nope. The Paste Eaters of CNN buried their own scoop - six nights before their Giuliani Documentary Series starts, too! - so television's longest-running failed marketing experience Anderson Cooper could alter the facts and mislead the nation by saying "Turns out the former president is not the only one with a classified documents problem. The CURRENT president has one as well." Sure, Coop. If a Swiss Army knife is the same as Jack The Ripper's Murder Weapon. Fire. Them. All. B-Block (20:02) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL PART 1: That "bronchial thing" turned out to be a sinus infection, but happily in September I brought you the career story that fits perfectly this descent into "But Her Emails 2". I would've just re-read it anyway: It was June 5, 1998, when I tried to quit as the anchor of MSNBC's top Clinton-Lewinsky-Starr show and two NBC News executives asked me to see an NBC official as part of a process to leave the network - except she turned out to be their leg-breaker and told me NBC versus me would be "David and Goliath" and NBC would crush me. C BLOCK (33:35) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL PART 2: But it was even worse: she promised that if I quit, NBC would put my parents "out on the street." That's how closely Ken Starr forged the link between his live made-for-tv political reality show and the profits at all the networks.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 108: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:44) SPECIAL COMMENT: The Rules Package the new Speaker of the House/Hostage Kevin McCarthy will present today will include a subcommittee with which Jim Jordan and Matt Gaetz insist they can investigate ANYTHING the Justice Department does, including active criminal investigations. What these toads don't know is that they're not the first half-baked fascists to try this, and something called The Linder Letter will protect DOJ from testifying, supplying evidence, or prosecuting anybody for contempt of Congress for ignoring the Gaetz-McCarthy masturbatory star chamber. Trump can't escape justice - not this way. Though the Holman Rule, which in theory could allow the House to zero out the salary of anybody in government, is a little more of challenge, there's a way to work around that, too. So as you hear the Taliban 20 and their puppet McCarthy emit dire threats today, have a good laugh. B-Block (15:40) EVERY DOG HAS ITS DAY: Waffles in Shreveport. (16:52) POSTSCRIPTS TO THE NEWS: Deport Bolsonaro back to Brasil? Why? Deport Bannon and Jason Miller to Brasil - DETAIN Bolsonaro here. And, just when you thought Matt Schlapp had lost his grip. (19:23) IN SPORTS: Now we have to worry about the popular baseball pitcher Liam Hendriks. (21:52) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: How to delete an offensive tweet and get others to disseminate it for you, by a Florida MAGA Congressmen, plus the National Hockey League has an idea for its All-Star Skills Competition: ALLIGATORS. C-Block (25:49) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Two happy anniversaries, within days of each other. How I helped to launch ESPN Radio, and then days later while traveling FOR the new network, happened to meet the lovely, delightful, gifted actress - the late Elizabeth Montgomery.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 107: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:43) Kevin "Oceans 11" McCarthy is overshadowed by The Daily Beast report that CPAC lynchpin and MAGA Caucus inspiration Matt Schapp has been accused of "sustained and unwanted and unsolicited" sexual groping by a man working for Herschel Walker's Senate campaign. The Schlapp story overshadowed what should've been the real headline: Congressman Don Bacon floated, on Fox News no less, a plan to offer the Democrats improved committee ratios and other procedural (but not insignificant) goodies in exchange for support for McCarthy because the GOP is going to have to be bipartisan to get anything done and it might as well start now. (6:00) But at least half a dozen other Republicans stepped on rakes. One of them led to the House breaking out in chants of "Ha-keem Ha-keem" and another is as remarkable a diatribe as I've ever heard in politics. (9:30) I don't put much stock in Ali Alexander, but he accused Marjorie Taylor Greene of an unspecified crime in Georgia and went deeply misogynistic to insult her. Get your popcorn. B-Block (14:20) EVERY DOG HAS ITS DAY: Zsa Zsa in Georgia (15:40) POSTSCRIPTS TO THE NEWS: The January 6 Presidential Citizen Medals vie for news space with a wrongful death suit against Trump, a sexual harassment suit against Rudy, and Prince Harry's Frozen Junk (19:00) IN SPORTS: You can use the word miracle: Buffalo Bills player Damar Hamlin is moving his limbs and asking for scoreboard updates, and Alex Rodriguez may have gotten caught shoveling about shoveling (21:07) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Conservatives blast Hannity, Bothsidesism in the House, and Joe Rogan is the dumbest guy on the planet. Again. Still. Forever. C-Block (26:47) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Sunday would've been Elvis Presley's birthday so it's time to play it again: not only did I - at age 18 - actually do a radio commercial for an Elvis Presley Concert that he never lived to see, but the tape of it still exists!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 106: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:44) SPECAL COMMENT: OK, you guys. I got it. I got the solution to the Republican debacle over the endless Sisyphean votes for Speaker of the House. BEFORE Congress convenes at Noon, Democratic Leader Hakeem Jeffries walks into Kevin McCarthy's office and says "Kevin! Do you WANT to be Speaker? Do you REALLY want to Speaker? I can MAKE you Speaker. Right now." And he hands him a small index card which reads "212 DEMOCRATIC VOTES" and then he says... B-Block (15:23) EVERY DOG HAS ITS DAY: The Mt. Vernon, New York, shelter is closing. We need to save its dogs and cats by the end of the month. (16:22) POSTSCRIPTS TO THE NEWS: FBI tries to goose the 1/5-1/6 Pipe Bomber investigation and hey, Trump, guess who's back in town? (18:11) IN SPORTS: The Red Sox do SOMETHING, will anybody get in the Hall of Fame, and meet Marcel Marcel (21:00) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Roll Call introduces the political equivalent of baseball metrics (and will regret it for the rest of time), Kari Lake goes nuttier, and MSNBC whores itself out - again. C-Block (27:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: He was the most famous newscaster in Los Angeles from 1960 through 2002 and he had the most famous sign-on catchphrase and everybody in Southern California knew it by heart - except for the night HE FORGOT IT.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 105: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: The Taliban Caucus lights the Republican Party and the House of Representatives on fire, while on his first day, the New Democratic leader Hakeem Jeffries perfectly whips his members to do literally do nothing more than bring their popcorn and watch everybody from Gaetz to McCarthy burn, baby, burn. It was a beautiful thing, and it left the full range of fascists from Tucker Carlson to Rep. Byron Donalds having to cobble together the nonsensical sophistry that their self-defenestration was actually democracy in action. If Jeffries can manage to keep the Democrats from reverting to their natural desire to do ill-timed good on behalf of the institution rather than let the Republicans shoot themselves again today, he will have won the 118th Congress no matter which Liz Truss the GOP eventually settles on in place of the wounded McCarthy. B-Block (15:15) SPECIAL COMMENT No. 2: There is the tragedy of Damar Hamlin of the Buffalo Bills, and then there is the disgusting reality that the National Football League is now trying to gaslight us. OF COURSE the league intended to resume Monday night's game even after the stricken player fell. And now the NFL has lied about it and sleazily blamed Joe Buck, Suzy Kolber and all of ESPN, to cover up its own insensitivity and callousness. This is, of course, the history of the NFL, which did the wrong thing after JFK was assassinated, and after Mayor George Moscone and Councilman Harvey Milk were assassinated hours before a Monday Night Football game in San Francisco, and after it was told flights could not be guaranteed to get its players and media to games the weekend after 9/11. But this lie makes the Hamlin nightmare even worse - as does the rank exploitation of it by the anti-vaccine conspiracy theorists, who spit on the memories of Chuck Hughes and J.V. Cain and Hank Gathers and so many athletes who died on the field, from cardiac distress. (30:54) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Trump and Michael Flynn are no match for Congressman-Elect George Santos. C-Block (36:09) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: In 1973, Charles Crawford was interviewing me for his TV news story from one of the earliest baseball card shows. In 1983, he was sitting next to me on the anchor desk at CNN. He introduced himself and I said "we've met before." His reaction when I told him how and when is worth your time.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 104: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:44) Of course, in the spirit of the candidate, and the entire Republican Party, when I say "I know who the secret candidate for speaker is," I might be lying. I am, however, telling the truth about the inevitability of the farce that must result if you run endless Political Purity Tests and try to use The Universal Solvent as a political tool. (6:20) Also ruining the Republicans' day, the George Santos saga. More lies - about Covid and Brain Tumors - and the Brazilians reviving their prosecution of Santos for fraud. (7:39) And were that not enough to spoil the coronation or schlock-blocking of McCarthy, there are the final Farewell Gifts from The House January 6th Committee, from Steve Bannon's plan for a January 21st Coup to Hope Hicks' breathless worry about her resume leading to the rhetorical question "Whaddya mean, NOW?" B-Block (15:30) EVERY DOG HAS ITS DAY: Polo in New York (17:11) IN SPORTS: The health of Martina Navratilova, the self-defeating success of Outdoor Hockey games, Jim Harbaugh's latest NFL dalliance and the day I operated on his knee, and how in the hell was Trump claiming a 2015 tax deduction for a football team he bankrupted in 1985? (21:30) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: two New York politicos, one blocking measures to save shelter dogs, the other resigning for Election Fraud (guess his party?) compete with Sean Spicer who can't spell, Period. C-Block (26:57) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Next Monday it'll be exactly 40 years since I looked out my apartment window just before bed, and looked down to the street and got a big surprise. The saga of Keith and the Molotov Cocktail.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 103: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:55) BARBARA WALTERS: IN MEMORIAM. Since her death Friday, there has been one story after another about Barbara Walters the groundbreaker and Barbara Walters the feminist and Barbara Walters the interviewer and Barbara Walters the role model and each of these accolades is more than justified. But I'm not seeing enough about Barbara Walters, the person with a large soul who survived as huge a disaster as ever befell the career of anybody in television, who fought her way back from punchline to immortal, and who thanked everybody who protected her, and tried to protect everybody - women and men alike - who might be facing any of the attacks she fought off in the years following 1976. As she wrote me once: "I'm not as tough as I pretend to be and the support means the world to me. I cannot thank you enough." B-Block (16:40) SPECIAL COMMENT: Chief Justice Roberts reinforced his reputation as the human embodiment of the "This Is Fine" dog in the burning room meme. Did his year end message on the judiciary for New Year's 2023 address Samuel Alito's insults towards this country? The revelation that he discussed Hobby Lobby with one of the theocrats before ruling? The madness of Ginni Thomas trying to overthrow the government? The Court throwing away its remaining credibility? No. He knows who the real victims here: The Justices. C-Block (26:15) SPECIAL COMMENT: Roberts, of course, is nothing compared to Sam Alito. Where is Alito's reply to The New York Times report about his leak to Hobby Lobby? Where is the Court's reply to the Judiciary Committees of the House and Senate demanding answers about it? Alito is a clear and present danger to this country.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 102: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:43) SPECIAL COMMENT No. 1: George Santos is the Brian Williams of politics. I joked last week "If that IS your real name." Now there's question as to whether or not it is. And about where he went to HIGH SCHOOL. And the time he claimed he was black. And about how he could get Kevin McCarthy elected speaker - and get him fired later. As the Feds begin to follow his equally dubious campaign money, I repeat my plea to Democrats: don't try to keep him from being seated by the House of Representatives next Tuesday. After it dawned on me that the comp for Santos is my unfortunate former friend Brian Williams, it also dawned on me that there might still be a way for Santos to worm his way out of it. And that's also reflected in the saga of the George Santos of 1954: Congressman Douglas Stringfellow of Arizona. B-Block (18:36) SPECIAL COMMENT No. 2: There is method to the January 6th Committee's madness of waiting until the Christmas-New Year's Break to release its final report and these fascinating deposition transcripts. I think they did it to shield the recommendation to invoke the Insurrection Clause of the 14th Amendment. As a bonus yesterday we got testimony that Kim Guilfoyle is an idiot, and that Melania Trump lived in mortal fear of being seen in her robe by Rudy Giuliani. B-Block (33:51) IN SPORTS: The death of Pele, an analysis of the athletic gifts that made him his game's greatest ever, and his surprising legacy in New York and the United States. (37:55) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Bad reporting at The New York Times, New York Magazine, and Politico is no match for - as Scottish tweeter Al Kennedy wrote - "I have to hand it to Andrew Tate, this is the first time I've seen someone be so outwitted by a teenager that they end up in jail without it involving a dog that solves fake ghost mysteries." C-Block (43:21) FRIDAYS WITH JAMES THURBER: His most reprinted story: "The Night The Bed Fell."See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

EPISODE 101: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:43) SPECIAL COMMENT: Be as righteously indignant as you want, Democrats. But do NOT attempt to block the seating of George "If That Is Your Real Name" Santos. No matter which way Kevin McCarthy turns, Santos will be his undoing, so just shut up and invest in popcorn. As a Republican District Attorney opens a probe of his campaign and his cornucopia of lies, Santos is still doubling down and dismissing as "nitpicking" those recoiling at his lies about his religion, family, the Holocaust, the Pulse Nightclub, 9/11, his finances, jobs, education, time spent in Brazil, time spent in Russia, possible criminal records, buildings he does or doesn't own, and lies about a DOG RESCUE. This is not a man even approaching the building that contains the hallway that leads to step one of the 12-Step Program for compulsive liars. It's so bad one Republican ex-Congressman is openly hoping they can seat Santos, then talk him into voting for McCarthy for Speaker, and only then resigning! B-Block (19:45) EVERY DOG HAS ITS DAY: Maltipoo Honey in New York (20:53) POSTSCRIPTS TO THE NEWS: I'm running for CEO of Twitter, the health of Jamie Raskin, the Bill Cosby Comeback-And-Spiked-Drink Tour (22:54) IN SPORTS: The Raiduhs Quarterback must go down and he must go down hard (24:38) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: The New York Times can't stop itself: now it's hyping books written by three correspondents who held news back from The Times in order to get book deals. Plus Elon Musk, and Mayor Eric Adams endorsing turning New York over to "Big Brother." C-Block (29:12) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Because I found the cassette recently, please enjoy the first professional sportscast I ever did, on July 10, 1979, plus sportscasts from Disco Demolition Night and the retirement of Catfish Hunter. Or don't. I won't hold it against you if you don't listen to 43-year old sportscasts!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.