Relationship Advice

Kwame Christian, TED speaker, bestselling author, and negotiation educator, reframes negotiation as an everyday relationship skill. He discusses unlearning myths, building the muscle with practice and role-play, and starting with self-awareness. He outlines three core skills—listening, curiosity, and emotion management—and presents the Compassionate Curiosity framework for collaborative problem-solving.

A near-argument over a costly purchase turns into a lesson on using curiosity to pause escalation. Practical question prompts and role-play practices for replacing criticism with information-seeking. Tips on slowing conversations, uncovering timelines and priorities, and holding differing needs without judgment. Short practice prompts to prepare for real-time conflict de-escalation.

Samantha Jerome, a registered dietitian nutritionist and certified diabetes educator, reframes health as whole-person care. She discusses how body image is a felt experience that shapes intimacy and conflict. Conversation covers curiosity over control, dangers of New Year reset extremes, small sustainable habit changes, and clearer partner communication to protect connection.

They explain how constant news shrink your window of tolerance and raise overwhelm. They point out how stress shows up as short tempers, distraction, and less presence with family. They highlight small acts of service as antidotes to despair and show how kindnesses ripple outward. They offer a practical check-in and a single, relationship-focused action to try today.

They unpack vulnerable reaching and how gentle, attuned responses catch that vulnerability. They contrast true outreach with criticism, demands, and passive aggression. They role-play repair conversations and explain why soft responses are hard. They offer practical steps to shift negative cycles, practice repair after conflict, and build safer, more connected relationships.

Explore the two-date rule and why it’s crucial to give second chances in dating. Discover how first dates can mislead due to nerves and circumstances. Learn to 'test the waters' of vulnerability by starting with low-depth disclosures to gauge responses. Find out how to build trust gradually, avoiding oversharing too soon. The hosts emphasize the importance of safe emotional practices while dating, ensuring connections grow steadily and healthily.

In this episode, we explore what a negative relationship cycle is and why couples get stuck repeating the same patterns during conflict. We explain how protective moves like criticism, shutdown, fixing, or withdrawal are attempts to regain safety—not signs that one partner is “the problem.” Knowing your cycle helps partners slow things down, take accountability for their part, and reduce shame. This awareness creates the foundation for staying regulated and eventually responding with more vulnerability and connection. Main Talking Points • Negative cycles • Protective moves • Self-protection patterns • Triggers & meaning • Awareness before change Give Me Discounts! ⁠Check out Relationship Academy! ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Cozy Earth⁠⁠⁠ -  Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! ⁠⁠⁠Beducate⁠⁠⁠ - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. ⁠⁠⁠AG1 - ⁠⁠⁠AG1 has become my go to every morning. ⁠⁠⁠Simple Practice⁠⁠⁠ - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? ⁠⁠⁠Spark My Relationship Course:⁠⁠⁠ Get $100 off our online course. Visit⁠⁠⁠ SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock⁠⁠⁠ for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! ⁠⁠⁠Skylight⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar.  If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠⁠ review in iTunes⁠⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Explore the dynamics of couples therapy as hosts discuss who typically reaches out for help. Discover the concept of 'safety in sameness' and how shared values create comfort. Delve into the 'basement metaphor' to illustrate surprises when deeper differences arise. Learn practical tools for couples, including world mapping questions and a weekly check-in to share highs and lows. Finally, get insights on exchanging formative stories to deepen understanding and connection.

The hosts dive into individuation, showcasing how personal differences shape relationships. They discuss how quirks can shift from charming to contentious when partners clash over needs. Sensory sensitivities and conflicting values often spark misunderstandings. By prioritizing curiosity over being right, couples can foster healthier conversations. Role-playing conflicts offers insights into validation and understanding, emphasizing the importance of realistic expectations and boundaries for enduring partnerships.

Couples Values Construction for 2026⁠ Here you can find some more instruction on how to construct your values as a couple as well as the values list. ⁠HOLD ME TIGHT - Workshop Jan 31 and Feb 1, 2026⁠ Join Cayla Bozovich, LPC, EFCT for a jam packed and fun weekend of learning about how to take your relationship back to a 10 ⁠Get $100 off Spark My Relationship⁠ 14 hours of relationship content Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices