The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women

What happens when the person you love turns out to be violent, racist, and determined to ruin you? This week, Algerian-American comedian Hedya joins Salma to share her shocking journey of falling for a man who seemed like home after years of family tension and cultural expectations, only to find herself trapped in a cycle of abuse. During the pandemic lockdown, he pushed her, dragged her out of the kitchen, and even locked her on the balcony. Yet two days later, she found herself baking him lasagna and chocolate cake, caught in the grip of trauma bonding. When he later sued her for custody of their dog and won, and began pursuing defamation lawsuits against her, Hedya was left financially drained but still fighting to reclaim her voice.In this raw conversation, Hedya speaks openly about reparenting herself, navigating the push and pull of being Arab-American, and learning to reconnect with her body and self-worth after years of shame. Salma reflects on her own experiences with domestic violence growing up, as well as the heartbreak and frustration of watching a friend remain in an abusive relationship, and why society still struggles to support survivors unless they fit the mold of a “perfect victim.” Together, they unpack the messy realities of faith, family, abuse, and survival and the courage it takes to finally take your power back.CREDITS: Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producer: Salma Hindy Cinematographer: Patrick Samaha Studio: 30 Irving Studios Editor: Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

What really makes love last? And how do you find a partner when family, community, and faith are all part of the puzzle?In this episode, Salma sits down with her older sister and mentor, Yasmin Elhady: comedian, lawyer, community leader, and one of the hosts of Hulu’s Muslim Matchmaker.Yasmin has matched over 58 couples and shares her expertise on it all:The 3 things every relationship needsWhy couples therapy doesn’t work without a foundationBeing “relationship young” and learning through mistakesWhy Yasmin insists Salma should never date a comedian (aka dating outside your lane)Small icks that don’t matter vs. real incompatibilityHow porn and swiping addictions wreck dopamineNo more ghosting! And what to do insteadWhy you have to leave the house to meet peopleYasmin’s rule: every married couple should introduce six single friends to each otherThey also get real about heartbreak, celibacy, high standards, and why marriage isn’t the goal, God is.Whether single, dating, or already married, Yasmin shares wisdom on how to build love rooted in integrity, faith, and joy.CREDITS:   Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producers: Salma Hindy & Sara Hussain Cinematographer: Tomas Liebel Studio: 30 Irving Studios Editor: Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of rape, alcoholism, domestic violence, and abuse. Please listen with care.This week, Salma sits down with trauma-informed divorce coach Sarzana Zafar - divorced twice (because once is boring) - to unpack the father wound and consent.Sarzana shares her journey from growing up with an alcoholic father in a Muslim community that judged and shamed instead of helping, to being date-raped at 19 when her repeated “no”s were ignored. What followed was a decade of trauma work, divorce, and reclaiming her voice. Today, she roars her boundaries. Like on her most recent Muzzmatch date, where he tried to kiss her after she’d already refused twice, and she shouted, “No means no. Did you not hear me the first two times?” before he cartoon-drove off in fear.Together, Salma and Sarzana unpack the infamous hadith that says if a wife refuses her husband in bed, the angels curse her until morning. Salma reflects on how this teaching has been weaponized to manipulate women into non-consensual sex, while Sarzana explains how it disconnected her from her own body - even when she was eager, her husband questioned whether she was doing it for herself or just for God.The conversation spans father wounds, how patience from a lover can be the ultimate turn-on, and the radical power of saying no. Salma recalls learning the mantra “If it’s not a fuck yes, it’s a no” at sex clubs - and adds her own gospel: “If you don’t go down on women but expect them to go down on you, you can die.” And a message to Desi men everywhere from Sarzana: “if you want your wife to be a freak in the sheets, get out of your parents’ homes.”CREDITS: Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producers: Sara Hussain & Salma Hindy Cinematographer: Patrick Samaha Studio: 30 Irving Studios Editor: Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

For the Love of Sex: Lover Girl with a Body Count of 100+This week, Salma sits down with Yasmine, a Karachi-born lover girl who has lived, loved, and - by her own account - slept with half of Dubai. With a body count well over 100, Yasmine opens up about her wildest experiences: from sex parties, kinks, and threesomes (including one she literally walked out of mid-session), to discovering the healing power of an open relationship.Raised under a mother who shamed her body and nitpicked every detail, Yasmine spent her 20s on a spree of sex - centering the male gaze - to prove she was desirable, even if her mom never knew. That journey led to her becoming a pandemic bride (marrying her first boyfriend to appease her parents), a divorce, and ultimately a much healthier love story: a gorgeous, white partner who values sex as deeply as she does. Together, they treat sex as an art form - aligning on openness, trust, communication, and chemistry. (Fun fact: she blew his mind on their first night by squirting in his mouth.)Yasmine also dives into bisexuality, body image, discovering who she is outside of the male gaze, putting “I hate hawk-tuah spit noises in bed” on her Type A Feeld profile, and her time doing sex work in Canada - where the hardest part wasn’t the sex itself, but fake-laughing at men’s jokes while most of her elderly clients “smelled like death.” She also explains why conventionally hot men are often the worst in bed, and why her favorite flavor of cock is Egyptian.Salma listens to a wiser, more experienced sexual baddie - and then flips the script to ask: is this a sex addiction? She reflects on her own celibacy, trauma, and what happens when you stop chasing love and hold everything constant. Together, they dig into the real talk around body image, family shame, dating in a new country, and the ongoing struggle of Muslim girls claiming space for their sexuality.CREDITS: Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producers: Salma Hindy & Sara Hussain Editor: Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault, Sexual CoercionIranian-American Sasha got her first period because of 9/11 (yes, really). Growing up in the Midwest to a cultural - NOT religious - family, her life became a crash course in contradictions: purity rings and sex-ed teachers calling girls “hoes,” a mom who said virgins are chocolates in fancy wrappers, dating a man she wasn’t attracted to for three years, being sexually assaulted by him, and hearing her mom respond, “It’s your fault.” She chased a man into the street for sex, cried after a hookup couldn’t get it up, scrolled Tinder to find a husband, and finally lost her virginity at 28. Only then did she realize the “treasure” she’d been protecting was never what she was promised.This is the messy, hilarious, and heartbreaking reality of being too virgin for the West, too slut for the East. Sasha unpacks the impossible contradictions of Muslim womanhood, and what happens when you finally decide to have sex on your own terms.If you need support:Global: Use the NO MORE Global Directory to find sexual assault and domestic violence hotlines wherever you are in the world.United States: Call the RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or use their online chat. Support is free and confidential, 24/7.Canada: Contact the Talk4Healing Helpline at 1-855-554-HEAL (for women in Ontario) or the Canadian Association of Sexual Assault Centres (CASAC) via casac.ca.CREDITS: Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producers: Salma Hindy & Sara Hussain Editor: Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

Growing up Pakistani-American in a conservative Muslim household, Hina learned early that her body was something to hide, police, and feel shame about. From a traumatic first period experience and relentless bullying, to chronic friend-zoning and a lifetime of sexualization, she spent decades feeling like sex was a party she’d never be invited to.In this raw and powerful conversation, Hina opens up about:Navigating vaginismus and pelvic floor therapy while breaking the silence in Muslim spacesHow cultural shame, bullying, and family scrutiny shaped her body image and self-worthThe difficulty - and vulnerability - of receiving love, attention, and pleasureLearning to dismantle inherited beliefs, embrace her sexuality, and redefine joy on her own termsHina’s story is a reminder that sexual pleasure is a spiritual birthright, sisterhood is survival, and there’s no shame in loving who you are.CREDITS: Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producers: Sara Hussain & Salma Hindy Cinematographer: Miles Kelly Studio: WTF Media Studio Editor: Danesha - WTF Media Studio & Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

Palestinian comedian Maysoon Zayid waited until marriage to have sex (at 33 years old). Then life came at her fast. In this raw and hilarious conversation with Salma Hindy, Maysoon opens up about the emotional rollercoaster of her romantic life and how living with cerebral palsy shaped her journey. From dating a Broadway River Dancer, to enduring miscarriages and finding relief after divorce, she reflects on the freedom of middle age and what it really means to reclaim one’s story.LINK TO MAYSOON’S BOOK: https://shinymisfits.com/CREDITS: Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producers: Sara Hussain & Salma Hindy Cinematographer: Maxim Allen-Lan Studio: My Friend's Basement Editor: Salma Hindy Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2025Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

From early childhood experiences, finding out about sex, vaginismus, first experiences with girls, fantasy boy crushes, celibacy to Ayahausca and beyond, Salma Hindy shares her entire sexual journey and the intention of this podcast. GUEST CALL OUT. Anonymity guaranteed.If you would like to be a guest on this pod, please email thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomen@gmail.com with a short synopsis of your story. Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy

Find out about Salma Hindy's FIRSTSFirst exposure to Sex EdFirst time truly learning Sex EdFirst time having sex and losing virginityFirst time learning about VaginismusInstagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy