Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast

Pete and Nikki kick off the new season by naming the thing nobody wants to put on a vision board: the post-holiday crash. If you’ve come out the other side feeling “behind,” they argue you’re not failing—you’re recovering. And because ADHD loves a transition about as much as it loves a quiet restaurant, that return-to-normal whiplash can hit harder than you expect.The temptation, of course, is to fix the feeling by buying a brand-new feeling: new planner, new system, new you, new personality, new carbon-based lifeform. Nikki gently drags that impulse into the daylight and offers a more realistic move—skip the reinvention and reestablish one anchor routine you already know helps. Something small, repeatable, and boring in the way that’s actually useful, whether it’s hydration, an end-of-day reset, or getting sleep back on purpose instead of by accident.They also lean into compassionate reframing—swapping the “I blew it” narrative for language that’s both true and less cruel—because shame is a famously unreliable productivity tool. There’s a new resource tied to that idea, too, and it’s meant to be the quick handrail you grab when January starts acting like a performance review.Links & Notes📃 Download Compassionate Reframing for the ADHD Brain (00:00) - Welcome to Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast (02:23) - You're Not Behind... You're Exhausted ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Melissa Bacheler, also known as 'DiscordMom,' takes the reins for a fun-filled quiz show finale. The hosts share quirky personal hobbies like Nikki's love for puzzles and Pete's passion for filmmaking. They dive into childhood fears and nostalgic nicknames, recalling teenage crushes from Ralph Macchio to Winona Ryder. The conversation includes imaginative 'what if' scenarios, like choosing fictional ADHD coaches and swapping co-hosts. Listeners get a glimpse of their life soundtracks and hear what music defines their decades.

Discover how motivation for those with ADHD starts with emotions, not logic. Dive into the concept of emotional planning and its practical applications. Learn why meaningful goals lead to better consistency. Explore helpful strategies like novelty, environment changes, and body doubling to find your personal 'wind.' Plus, hear real examples of how emotional alignment can transform mundane tasks into meaningful actions. Joining a supportive community can amplify motivation, making daunting tasks feel achievable!

Jami Shapiro, a certified senior move manager and ADHD coach, shares her insights on aging with ADHD, shaped by her own late diagnosis and discovering her mother's unacknowledged ADHD. She discusses the emotional intricacies of downsizing and the heavy decision-making that often overwhelms ADHD adults during life's transitions. Jami also highlights the impact of retirement on structure, offers practical tips to safeguard seniors from scams, and promotes a compassionate understanding of possessions and family relationships, encouraging a positive view of aging.

Dive into the world of tolerations, those pesky little tasks we tolerate that drain our energy daily. Discover how they evolve and become invisible over time, from crooked pictures to unaddressed maintenance. Explore the emotional impacts of living with these annoyances and learn how to differentiate between tolerations and avoidance. The hosts offer practical tips on creating a tolerations list, prioritizing tasks, and visualizing completion to overcome procrastination. Embrace the journey to a clutter-free mind!

This week’s guest is Kyrus Keenan-Westcott (Ky), a content creator and mental health advocate known for his insights on ADHD and introversion. Ky shares his journey of being diagnosed with ADHD at 35, exploring feelings of grief and acceptance. He debunks myths about introversion, emphasizing it's about energy management, not dislike of socializing. Ky discusses 'introvert guilt,' the joy of solo travel, and the beauty of setting boundaries. Plus, he reveals his whimsical new fragrance collaboration inspired by adult ADHD!

Dr. Nachi Felt, a clinical psychologist and Columbia University professor, returns to explore the Cycle of Accountability. He emphasizes the shift from viewing accountability as punishment to recognizing it as a connection to personal values and purpose. Their discussion reveals how motivation for those with ADHD is deeply tied to meaning, and how small acts of self-acceptance can trigger significant change. Nachi also reframes attention as presence and delves into how early responses to ADHD shape our self-worth and identity.

In this engaging discussion, James Ochoa, a licensed counselor and author of Focused Forward, sheds light on long-term planning challenges for individuals with ADHD. He emphasizes the importance of treating your future self with compassion rather than pressure, helping listeners reframe their relationship with responsibility. James introduces the reflective tool 11Q Your ADHD, designed to aid self-understanding and progress. The conversation also highlights the need for community and tailored support systems to enhance motivation and foster emotional safety.

Alan Brown, an ADHD coach and the innovative mind behind ADD Crusher, shares his journey from misdiagnosis to a powerful advocate for self-advocacy. He reveals how shifting your mindset from 'I suck' to 'I'm trying' can transform your approach to challenges. Alan emphasizes the importance of articulating specific needs and requesting workplace accommodations, using his own experience of transitioning to a private office as a key example. He encourages understanding ADHD's impact to build empathy and support in professional settings.

Dr. Amie DeHarpporte, a licensed psychologist and ADHD assessment specialist, dives into the complexities of diagnosing ADHD. She discusses how social media, particularly TikTok, shapes perceptions and leads to misconceptions about the condition. The episode explores the balance of overdiagnosis and underdiagnosis, stressing the need for thorough assessments to validate experiences. Dr. DeHarpporte highlights the importance of understanding ADHD as a nuanced lens, rather than a binary label, and emphasizes the emotional validation and strengths unearthed through proper diagnostics.