Make Your Damn Bed

We really gotta get over the fear of being seen. We should never feel bad for trying. The only people who feel comfortable criticizing others for trying are typically envious of your fearlessness, or washed up from their time in the spotlight, and they have nothing against you but everything against them for not being you at that moment. Excuse my language but FUCK EM. Every professional in the history of professions has failed and begun again and failed and begun again. Its between those failures where we define and find our own versions of success. Give yourself a chance to “fail” freely and eventually you’re going to redefine failure. Because you cant call something a failure that was simply practice. It’s not a failure til you quit. Until you give up, everything is just practice. GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

UNIVERSAL TRUTH: Just because it ain’t your fault, doesn’t mean it’s not your responsibility to deal with it. I think taking responsibility for your trauma gets lost in translation a bit. We often say, “everything happens for a reason” or “there’s a lesson in everything”; and while those may be helpful reframes for a select few, most people won’t benefit from those generalities, especially at a time of need. So yes, dealing with your trauma is your responsibility, in the immediate sense: when you have a negative experience (even if it’s in no way, shape, or form your fault) you have no choice but to respond to that experience. It’s unfair, unjust, and unfortunately - it’s a part of life that feels avoidable yet rarely is. The future sense: if it affects your behaviors in a way that may be harmful to yourself or others. Yet this should be done with an appropriately matched, qualified mental health professional. Of course, I never want to imply that all of the bad things that happen to us are “meant to teach us” or that we can avoid all of life’s bullshit if we “reflect or learn or try” enough - I just personally find it takes the sting out of life’s little miseries when you say “it’s all part of the plot” or “It’s character building” and then you don’t have to cry about it more than the healthy amount of crying, so you can move on to the next lil adventure. You’re not your trauma, but you are the badass that overcame it. You aren’t your mistakes, but you are the person who made it here, now. And though you deserve the peace that IS around + the lessons that come from that, I don’t doubt that you’ll kick all the ass that needs kickin’ in the between time. GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Excitement and anxiety fire up the exact same space in your brain, so if we can work on reframing our perspective, we may not even have to shake the anxious feelings at all! You’re not nervous because you’re going to talk in front of a large group of people, you’re excited because you get to feel like Taylor Swift??? The thing we’re nervous about is starting, and a reappraisal can help. If you’re someone who can assess all the ways shit can go wrong, you owe it to yourself and everyone around you to assess all the ways it can go right, too! This way, you have a focus for excitement where there is also anxiety - which is especially helpful when staying calm isn’t an option.  RESOURCES: https://positivepsychology.com/comfort-zone/#google_vignette and https://www.waldenu.edu/programs/psychology/resource/the-pros-and-cons-of-comfort-zonesGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE:www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

DAY 9: COMFORT ZONES: Have you ever heard a term so much that it loses all meaning? I feel that way about comfort zones a little bit. Maybe because mine fluctuates from year to year or maybe cuz I’ve read “life begins right outside of your comfort zone” in too many public restrooms, but when I came back to revamp this episode about getting out of your comfort zone - I knew I needed to reevaluate my relationship with the term. According to Judith Bardwick,“The comfort zone is a behavioral state within which a person operates in an anxiety-neutral condition, using a limited set of behaviors to deliver a steady level of performance, usually without a sense of risk.”So while a comfort zone is both comfortable and safe, it is not a place where much growth can occur. Learning, growing, doing - can be an uncomfortable practice if you are not accustomed to it. So that’s why it’s crucial to understand our personal relationships with our current comfort zone, so we can see where and when it’s been interfering with the (often uncomfortable) learning + growth that is necessary to creating a roomier, and more comfortable comfort zone in the long run.  If we don’t evaluate where we are now, the starting will feel a hell of a lot harder and scarier when it’s time to step out. Incremental change is WAY easier than major change. Tiny changes now save major upsets later (ahem *looking at you policy makers*) but the sooner we start, the sooner we benefit. Just remember direction is more important than speed. So take your time getting started. RESOURCES: https://positivepsychology.com/comfort-zone/#google_vignette and https://www.waldenu.edu/programs/psychology/resource/the-pros-and-cons-of-comfort-zonesGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE:www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A life without any indulgence is just plain sad AF.It’s not just me who says it - there are studies that demonstrate that some indulgence is as fundamental to a happy life as self-control is. Decades of research have shown that self-control is associated with many positive outcomes, including our overall well-being. But as self-control helps us to align our behaviors with our long-term goals (e.g., exercising to stay fit) it can often shield us from conflicting hedonic goals (e.g., relaxing) and because of these often contradictory wants and needs, it can undermine a lot of the positive effects of the long term goals (HELLO intrusive thoughts). So, next time your brain insists on stopping for pizza rolls, it’s not because it’s trying to sabotage you, it’s trying to remind you it’s okay to indulge once in a while. Some of us have been conditioned to resist things that feel good instantly, but even the science confirms:  Self control + instant gratification are both critical pieces in our overall wellbeing. GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 A life without any indulgence is just plain sad AF.It’s not just me who says it - there are studies that demonstrate that some indulgence is as fundamental to a happy life as self-control is. Decades of research have shown that self-control is associated with many positive outcomes, including our overall well-being. But as self-control helps us to align our behaviors with our long-term goals (e.g., exercising to stay fit) it can often shield us from conflicting hedonic goals (e.g., relaxing) and because of these often contradictory wants and needs, it can undermine a lot of the positive effects of the long term goals (HELLO intrusive thoughts). So, next time your brain insists on stopping for pizza rolls, it’s not because it’s trying to sabotage you, it’s trying to remind you it’s okay to indulge once in a while. Some of us have been conditioned to resist things that feel good instantly, but even the science confirms:  Self control + instant gratification are both critical pieces in our overall wellbeing. GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You’ve showed up EVERY single day. Every shower you’ve taken, every tear you’ve shed, every laugh you’ve had, every connection you’ve made, you’ve been there for. And sure you didn't have a choice, I get that, it seems cheesy but eat up, rat friends. - because we spend so much time showing gratitude for our besties if we’ve got them. And I DO love appreciating a good community moment, it’s also crucial to show up and appreciate you. GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

seems cliché, but time is by far our most valuable commodity. Money comes and goes but time you can never get back. This is why we often feel so strongly about the things we’ve invested our time or money into - because we’ve invested we feel we’re losing our deserved payout if we bail. But just because we make an investment, doesn’t mean it’s always the right one for you. In fact, we’re often focused so much on recouping our perceived losses that we ignore the wins we could be making had we cut the costs earlier. Our time and effort are the most valuable resources we have. And if we’re wasting those valuable resources on things that are harmful to us, we need to pay attention to that - because only YOU can know if an investment is right for you. Sure there are “advisors” but deep down, we’re in charge of the way we handle our finances/our Be tactful with how you use your time. Divide it and budget it like you would your money. Respect your free time like cash in the hand. If you’re the type that has no time to focus on your own needs, and must focus ALL of your time on others, everyone ends up broke! So ask for loans. You deserve to be invested in the same way you invest in others. GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

People rarely sustain the exact same routine forever, really. Habits are meant to be used as tools, and sure, some of them stick for many years, but more often than not, I drop habits like it’s bath night at the nunnery! Most things I begin, I give up on. Literal obsessions I have had over the years have given way to make space for new/updated experiences.  Imagine if we clung SO tightly to everything we’ve ever loved or felt passionate about. Life isn’t one size fits all! Find what fits, feels right on YOUR body, and your current style, so you can get back to LIVING your life instead of constantly trying to change it! GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Momentum is far more valuable than motivation. Motivation is inconsistent. Some days I feel like a superhero but most days I just wanna take a nap + eat hot chips. It seems silly to say to “just start” as if it’s easy - sure, starting may be simple, but it ain’t easy. That said, it is easier to stand up + start, than to tack on the additional labor of convincing yourself to stand up + start first, so I truly find the best way to get rid of dread is with action.Sometimes, taking ONE step is all it takes to see how vast the mirage of our overthinking was. Have you ever been stuck in bed without motivation self to do the tiniest piece of the puzzle, the rest falls into place without thought? I find that a shower clears my head of all the internal dilemmas that had me stuck in bed - over planning and hating every second.GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastOR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.