Real Men Feel with Andy Grant

Rebuilding After Betrayal, Divorce, and the Dead Bedroom: Ralph Brewer on Men, Shame, and SupportHost Andy Grant interviews men’s coach Ralph Brewer about rebuilding after infidelity, divorce, and relationship collapse. Ralph shares his own experience of being divorced within 60 days after his spouse’s infidelity and becoming a single father of three, including how he blamed himself for years and later learned he couldn’t control another person’s choices. He explains how therapy and connecting with other men led him to create the “Dad Starting Over” platform, write five books—starting with the breakout “The Dead Bedroom Fix”—and build HelpForMen.com and the paid Brotherhood community with frequent Zoom meetings, forums, conferences, and coaching. They discuss common patterns among anxious, codependent “Mr. Nice Guy” men paired with avoidant partners, how “man up” emotional suppression causes flatness and mental health issues, the risks of bitterness and rapid rebound dating, and why peer support and asking for help are essential.00:00 Shame and Masculinity00:19 Show Intro and Guest01:28 Ralph's Divorce Story02:34 Owning Too Much Blame03:58 Therapy and Brotherhood05:10 From Blog to Brand07:32 Identity After Breakup10:29 Man Up Culture Costs12:15 Anxious Avoidant Trap15:48 Rewiring Shame and Self-Worth18:07 Dead Bedroom Explained19:58 First Step Honest Inventory21:11 Why Men Choose Wrong21:51 Pragmatic Partner Vetting22:55 Divorce Patterns Repeat23:56 Avoiding Bitter Blame25:36 Rebound Relationship Trap26:53 Neurodivergence And Dating29:27 Rock Bottom And Coping32:04 Brotherhood And Community36:52 How To Find Ralph38:31 Ask For Help40:01 Final TakeawaysConnect with RalphRalph Brewer — https://helpformen.com/Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/dadstartingoverInstagram — https://instagram.com/dadstartingoverResourcesThe Dead Bedroom Fix by Ralph Brewer — https://amzn.to/4tgMJ7nAll of Ralph’s book — https://amzn.to/4s85KYMJoin other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 397

The Hollow Man Syndrome: Redefining Success, Vulnerability, and the New AlphaHost Andy Grant interviews Kenyada Meadows, a Bank of America senior vice president and master certified executive coach, about “hollow man syndrome”—men who appear successful but feel empty and unfulfilled. Meadows explains the metaphor of a strong tree with decaying roots and describes how hollowing out can manifest as strained relationships, self-medicating, short tempers, or acting out. He contrasts traditional “alpha” achievement-driven masculinity with “emotional integrity,” emphasizing vulnerability, community, and emotional literacy as skills for connection and asking for help. Meadows outlines his “New Alpha” framework of three domains—relationships at work, at home, and with oneself—critiques the myth of perfect work-life balance with the idea of “wobbling well,” and discusses re-parenting the inner child, grace, and intentional reflection. He shares taking four months of paid parental leave in a competitive Wall Street environment, finding no downside, and encourages men to broaden “providing” beyond money to presence and communication.00:00 The Hollow Tree Metaphor00:31 Meet Kenyada Meadows01:32 Defining Hollow Man Syndrome04:19 Personal Turning Points05:37 Mentorship and The New Alpha08:23 Costs of Traditional Alpha09:56 Emotional Integrity Skills14:38 Why High Achievers Feel Empty16:31 Wobbling Work Life Balance18:40 Reparenting the Inner Child21:07 Taking Paternity Leave24:02 Providing Beyond Money28:04 Three Domains Framework29:49 Rethinking Alpha Culture32:46 Connect and Final Takeaway36:15 Closing and Community InviteConnect with KenyadaKenyada Meadows — https://www.executiveparentcompany.com/LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/kenyadameadowscpaciacfe/ResourcesThe New Alpha: Be Three Times the Leader Through Balance, Not Dominance by Kenyada Meadows — https://amzn.to/4bA4BCVConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 396

Men’s Health, Loneliness, and Real MasculinityHost Andy Grant opens by saying men need truth and connection, not shame or fake strength. After a guest postpones due to health news, Andy shares he has a colonoscopy scheduled and urges men to prioritize physical health: get annual checkups, know family history, ask doctors questions, and follow colorectal cancer screening guidance, noting rising deaths under 50 and citing Chadwick Boseman and James Van Der Beek. He then discusses an international survey reporting that about a third of Gen Z men believe wives should obey husbands and husbands should have final say, interpreting this as a search for identity, direction, belonging, respect, purpose, and brotherhood. Andy argues that men are hurting without language, loneliness increases vulnerability to harmful online narratives, and real masculinity is responsibility, integrity, presence, and emotional honesty, inviting listeners to join his community at https://realmenfeel.org/group.00:00 What Men Really Need00:18 Welcome and Plans Change00:44 Colonoscopy Wake Up Call01:22 Screening Facts and Risks02:31 Gen Z Survey Shock03:18 What Men Are Hungry For04:32 Pain Turns Into Anger05:15 Loneliness and Online Voices06:05 Masculinity Without Domination07:17 Why Real Men Feel Exists07:38 Two Reminders and Next StepsConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join us in the Authentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 395

Escaping the Success Trap: When Achievement Still Feels EmptyHost Andy Grant discusses “the success trap,” where men achieve promotions, money, status, and accomplishments yet feel empty, disconnected, and numb. Citing a Forbes article, he explains the paradox that believing we’re successful can limit growth by creating fear of risking standing in others’ eyes, even when success lacks meaning. Drawing from his corporate experience and nearly 400 Real Men Feel episodes, he describes signs and outcomes such as identity tied to performance, discomfort with rest, emotional inaccessibility, burnout, midlife crisis, relationship struggles, addiction, and self-destructive behavior. Grant shares quotes from Johnny Cash, Maya Angelou, Albert Schweitzer, and Winston Churchill, then offers three solutions: redefine success to include meaning and connection, reconnect with feelings through reflection and journaling, and build brotherhood to counter isolation, inviting listeners to the Authentic AF community.00:00 The Success Trap00:36 Welcome and Setup01:34 Why Success Feels Empty03:03 My Corporate Wakeup03:44 Signs You Are Stuck04:42 Achievement Armor Costs06:03 Patterns From 400 Talks07:01 Redefining Real Success08:01 Three Ways Out09:53 Join Authentic AFConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join us in the Authentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 394

Midlife Identity, Men Speaking Up, and Finding Fulfillment After 50Andy Grant interviews UK-based Philip Briscoe, host of the Mid-life Men Podcast, about his midlife turning point at 50 after leaving a tech job where he felt undervalued and realizing he didn’t know who he was beyond work. Philip describes how stress and lack of fulfillment contributed to depression, anxiety, poor sleep, and lifestyle-related health issues including type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity, and fatty liver, many of which improved after he stepped away. He explains creating his podcast to fill a lack of resources for men, finding purpose by sharing men’s recovery narratives, and later turning interviews into his book Men Speak Up, focused on communication and getting help. They discuss misconceptions about the “midlife crisis,” hormonal and mental-health realities, ageism, normalizing taboo topics like suicidal thoughts, and the importance of supportive friendships and groups.00:00 Burnout and Identity Loss00:57 Meet Philip Briscoe02:08 Turning 50 Wake Up Call03:32 Health Alarms and Change04:09 Finding Purpose Through Podcasting06:46 Work Family and Delayed Joy09:44 Why Mid-life Men Exists12:24 Lessons Men Speak Up15:15 Depression Signs and Support18:45 From Podcast to Book20:51 Midlife Crisis Myths25:59 Purpose as a Continuum27:25 Connect and Final Takeaway30:13 Closing and Community InviteConnect with PhilipPhilip Briscoe — https://www.mid-lifemen.com/Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/midlifemenpodcast/Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/midlifemen/LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/philipbriscoe/ResourcesMen Speak Up: Journeys Through Mental Health by Philip Briscoe — https://amzn.to/4kT4QgJConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 393

Real Men Feel: 10-Year Anniversary—From Blab to Authentic AFAndy Grant celebrates 10 years of Real Men Feel, which first went live on February 23, 2016 on Blab, and thanks co-founder Appio Hunter, past guests, and listeners for helping create a space where men can talk about the full range of emotions. The episode features audio from the very beginning of the first 2016 episode, a clip from episode 100 about two and a half years later reflecting on how the show grew from a planned monthly, 30-minute format into weekly hour-long conversations with guests, and additional segments from more recent discussions. Across multiple guest clips answering the recurring question, “What’s one thing you wish more men knew?”, themes include vulnerability as strength, listening, empathy, belonging and finding a tribe, not having to be the strongest or prove masculinity, being allowed to say no and speak up, self-acceptance and compassion, and not having to go it alone. Andy concludes that men need more connection rather than more advice and invites listeners to join the Authentic AF community at realmenfeel.org/group, offering live calls, men’s circles, meditations, honest conversations, and relationships without performance or posturing.00:00 10-Year Anniversary: Why Real Men Feel Exists02:02 How the Episode Will Unfold: Clips From 2016 to Now02:47 Flashback to Episode 1 (2016): Andy’s Mission & Creating Space for Men04:18 Meet Co-Host Appio Hunter: Emotional Healing & Men as Human Beings06:22 Episode 100 Throwback: Celebrating the Journey & Early Blab Days11:01 From Monthly to Weekly: How the Show’s Format Evolved13:09 “One Thing I Wish More Men Knew” Montage Begins: Vulnerability & Belonging15:49 Relationships as a Portal: Communication, Healing & Intimacy18:58 More Wisdom From Guests: Listening, Ego, Empathy & Authenticity22:45 You Don’t Have to Go It Alone: Voice, Support & Self-Acceptance27:53 Closing Reflections: Connection Over Advice + Join Authentic AFConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 392

Are You Being Real?In this episode of Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant addresses the skepticism surrounding authenticity, particularly among men. He explores how the term has been diluted and misused across contexts, reducing it to a mere buzzword. Andy revisits the core values of his show—authenticity, vulnerability, and compassion—while sharing personal experiences that illustrate the genuine meaning of being authentic. He emphasizes the importance of honesty, responsibility, and emotional openness to truly embody authenticity. Finally, Andy invites listeners to join his online community, Authentic AF at http://realmenfeel.org/group, to further explore and practice genuine self-expression.00:00 Introduction and Host Welcome00:29 The Misuse of Authenticity01:11 Defining True Authenticity02:13 Personal Journey to Authenticity04:13 Practicing Authenticity in Daily Life05:45 Challenges Men Face with Authenticity07:28 Living Authentically and Community Invitation08:07 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | https://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 391

Unlocking the Real You: The Power of Animal ArchetypesIn this episode of Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant is joined by Eric Gee, a published author, life and writing coach, who shares his unique personality typing system based on animal archetypes. They discuss how this system provides deeper insights into oneself beyond superficial traits, helping individuals make better life choices across careers, relationships, and personal growth. Eric elaborates on common misconceptions in traditional personality models and the importance of embracing one's true nature. They explore the real-life application of these archetypes in education, relationships, and creative work, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and authenticity. Highlights include discussions of specific animal types, such as stags and peacocks, and their relevance to personal and professional life, as well as the impact of societal and parental expectations on identity.00:00 The Dangers of Not Being Yourself00:18 Introduction to Real Men Feel00:26 Meet Eric Gee: Author and Personality Expert01:23 Understanding Personality Typing03:52 The Power of Animal Archetypes06:14 Common Personality Types and Their Traits07:36 Personality Types in Men and Society11:57 Discovering Your True Personality13:19 Impact of Social Programming on Boys18:55 Upcoming Book and Common Questions19:25 Relationship Dynamics and Personality Types21:12 Creative Expression and Animal Types22:58 Finding Your Authentic Voice25:44 Understanding and Accepting Your Personality29:29 Harry Potter Characters and Personality Types32:43 Empowerment Through Self-Discovery34:38 Where to Learn More and Final ThoughtsConnect with EricEric Gee — https://www.projectyoutopia.com/Take The Test — https://youtopiaproject.com/Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/the_power_of_personality/Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/eric.c.gee/LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/eric-gee-3565a79/ResourcesPower of Personality: Unlock the Secrets to Understanding Everyone in Your Life by Eric Gee — https://amzn.to/3Zq3ekyConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 390

Transformative Fatherhood with Jon Hord: From Reactive to PresentIn this episode of Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant speaks with Jon Hord, founder of the Engaged Father Project. Jon shares his journey from a stressed-out father to becoming an emotionally regulated, present parent. They discuss intentional parenting, emotional regulation, and redefining strong fatherhood. Jon explains the importance of self-awareness, vulnerability, and conscious choices in improving fatherhood. He also discusses his transition from a corporate career to life coaching and the development of the Engaged Father Project, which helps fathers become the best versions of themselves. Jon offers practical advice for daily practices that can help fathers align their actions with their parenting goals.00:00 The Power of Vulnerability in Fatherhood00:27 Introduction to Real Men Feel00:41 Meet Jon Hord: From Reactive to Present Parenting01:06 The Biggest Disconnect in Fatherhood03:10 Jon's Journey: Becoming the Father He Didn't Want to Be05:40 The Turning Point: Finding a Life Coach08:31 Creating the Engaged Father Project14:03 The Role of a Life Coach15:56 The Importance of Vulnerability in Fatherhood34:54 Daily Practices for Intentional Fatherhood38:09 Final Thoughts and ResourcesConnect with JonThe Engaged Father Project — https://theengagedfatherproject.com/Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/theengagedfatherproject/TikTok — https://www.tiktok.com/@theengagedfatherpYouTube — https://www.youtube.com/@TheEngagedFatherProjectLinkedIn — http://www.linkedin.com/in/jon-hordConnect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 389

Overcoming Life's Inner PrisonsIn this compelling episode of Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant interviews Matt Melvin, author of 'Bullied Behind Bars.' Matt shares his harrowing experiences of incarceration, bullying, and isolation, focusing on the mental prison of blame and anger that lingered long after his physical release. The conversation delves into the challenges many men face, such as shame, fear, and past trauma, and discusses the importance of emotional survival, men's groups, and what it truly means to feel free inside. Matt talks about his journey to self-love and forgiveness and his plans to create a supportive community for men. This episode provides a powerful reminder that freedom is more about inner connection and honesty rather than external conditions.00:00 Introduction to Forgiveness and Accountability00:13 Welcome to Real Men Feel00:34 Meet Matt Melvin: Author and Survivor02:01 Matt's Journey Through Incarceration05:31 Life After Prison: Challenges and Growth13:11 The Importance of Men's Work and Vulnerability19:23 Matt's Vision for the Future27:45 Final Thoughts and Contact InformationConnect with MattMatt Melvin — https://www.bulliedbehindbars.com/Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/matthew.melvin.5621X — https://x.com/barsbulliedResourcesBullied Behind Bars: A Gay Christian Trump Supporter Goes to Prison by Matt Melvin — https://amzn.to/4r2mSi8Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel#RealMenFeel ep 388