The Angry Therapist Podcast

Closure isn’t a door you wait to have slammed shut - it’s a bridge you build. In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim breaks the biggest “closure” myths and shows you how to move forward without an apology, a perfect explanation, or one last text. If you’ve felt stuck in relationship residue, this is your map. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why “waiting for closure” keeps you stuck Acceptance over answers (and why that heals faster) How to generate closure without contact Turning an expired relationship into a stronger self Realism > idealism: healing as a process, not an event Community & service as fuel for resilience If this helped, follow the show on Spotify and share it with someone who needs it today. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A 30-second, playful moment sparked this episode - and a reminder: love isn’t generic. We break down how to speak love so it lands without abandoning yourself, especially when partners differ. What you’ll learn (10 takeaways): Love isn’t generic - different emotional blueprints How to avoid the “I’m giving everything, it’s still not enough” trap Building emotional safety so defenses drop Reducing resentment & energy burnout Deepening intimacy beyond the physical Faster conflict repair by making the nervous system feel safe Future-proofing with regular “What makes you feel most loved?” check-ins Co-regulation: why the right love calms insecure attachment Turning micro-moments into daily bonding rituals Why guessing breaks trust (love is a skill) Try this today: Ask your partner, “What lands for you this week?” Then do one unexpected gesture in their way of receiving love (a short note, a quick chore, five phone-free minutes together, a gentle touch, a tiny gift). If this helped, hit subscribe for practical, no-fluff relationship tools.Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim takes you inside his personal journey of building a new life in Costa Rica - the highs, the lows, and the unexpected lessons about presence, clarity, and decision-making. From nausea-inducing dirt roads to perfect mornings surfing in Costa Rica, John unpacks how life-changing decisions aren’t made in one big moment… but in a collection of small ones. You’ll learn: Why clarity about life, love, and career comes from moments, not constant certainty How to notice and “bank” the moments that matter when deciding whether to move abroad, who to love, or what path to take The challenges of living in Costa Rica - from unpaved roads to missing city comforts and the surprising joys that outweigh them How being present is the only way to truly capture moments (and how most of us miss them) Why life’s “yes” often comes from an accumulation of tiny affirmations rather than a single sign Join the conversation! What moments have shaped your biggest life decisions? Have you noticed when your “piggy bank” of yeses finally tipped the scale? Share your story with us. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations about expat life, self-discovery, and building a life that actually feels like yours. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today’s episode, John Kim answers raw, unfiltered listener questions on the theme of breakups and divorce — the things you’d never dare ask your therapist. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim gets personal about the mother wound - how it quietly shapes our self-worth, love life, and sense of safety. From a surprising MDMA journey insight to stories about his Korean-American upbringing, John unpacks what it’s like to grow up without emotional warmth from mom - and how this absence leaves lasting imprints on both men and women. You’ll learn: Why the mother wound isn’t just a “women’s issue” How emotional absence can be just as impactful as physical absence The different ways the mother wound shows up in men (approval seeking, caretaking confusion, fear of intimacy) and women (perfectionism, chronic self-doubt, boundary struggles) How it fuels unhealthy patterns like codependency, attachment insecurity, and emotional projection Practical steps for healing: naming the wound without blame, reparenting yourself, rewriting old relationship scripts, and doing inner child work Join the conversation! Have you noticed the mother wound in your own relationships or self-image? What has helped you start to heal? Share your story with us. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations about love, identity, and the work of healing yourself from the inside out. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks the father wound - how it silently shapes our self-worth, relationships, and ideas of masculinity. Through raw personal stories and practical, street-level insights, he explores what it means to grow up with a “ghost father” and how both men and women can begin to heal. You’ll learn:  Why the father wound exists even if your dad was “there” How it shows up differently for men and women Why emotional absence can leave deeper scars than physical absence How it becomes a blueprint for love, power, and identity Practical ways to reparent yourself and break the cycle Join the conversation! Do you think you have a father wound? How has it shown up in your relationships or self-image? Share your story with us. Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations on relationships, self-worth, and the work of healing. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join licensed therapist Vanessa Bennett, who specializes in depth psychology and runs the Inner Compass Academy, as she discusses healing and breakups with fellow therapist John Kim. They tackle why the concept of being 'healed' is a myth and emphasize the non-linear road of personal growth. Listeners will learn about the emotional complexities of breakups, the differences between codependency and genuine connection, and how to prioritize self-fulfillment in relationships. With humor and insight, this conversation sheds light on love, loss, and the journey to emotional wellness.

Explore the complexities of jealousy as a reflection of deeper emotional issues. Discover how it can serve as a protective signal rather than a burden. The discussion highlights the difference between healthy and toxic jealousy, urging vulnerability and open communication. Learn how to establish 'jealousy-safe' relationships rooted in trust and connection. Transform jealousy into a catalyst for personal growth and self-understanding, turning a potentially destructive emotion into an opportunity for deeper intimacy.

Today, John shares a personal take on creativity, productivity, and the pressures they carry. He explores how AI is reshaping the creative process, the quiet power of everyday moments, and why it's worth challenging traditional ideas of success. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today, John unpacks how childhood experiences shape our ability to express emotions and why traits often seen as flaws can actually be powerful strengths. He also highlights the importance of reframing our emotional narratives, building a strong support system, and embracing the messy—but meaningful—journey toward authenticity. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices