Typology

What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object? Well, it can either be a recipe for a really great relationship…or a not-so-great one. But when a Peacemaker and a Challenger are both healthy, they bring out the best in each other. Today's guests, Christine and Steve Bailey show us how learning to balance their differences as an Enneagram 9 and an Enneagram 8 has helped their marriage and their business thrive. We explore the dynamics between their relationship and how learning to speak each other's language and tapping into the other's strengths fosters a perfect yin-yang relationship. Tune in on Apple, Spotify, or your favorite podcast player for this amazing conversation.

We have a very special guest for you today…author, editor, and Enneagram One, Jana Riess joins me for an in-depth discussion about The Improvers. As the very talented editor of both The Road Back to You and The Story of You, Jana is well-versed in the Enneagram and brings a wealth of knowledge and valuable insights to our conversation about lasting personal transformation. A few topics we explore today are: the Improvers fixation on anger what messages Ones internalize, and how Ones can tap into the high side of Seven to find their joy ABOUT JANA RIESS Since 2008, Jana Riess has been an editor in the publishing industry, primarily working in the areas of religion, history, popular culture, ethics, and biblical studies. From 1999 to 2008, she was the Religion Book Review Editor for Publishers Weekly, and continues to write freelance reviews for PW as well as other publications. She holds degrees in religion from Wellesley College and Princeton Theological Seminary, and a Ph.D. in American religious history from Columbia University. She speaks often to media about issues pertaining to religion in America, and has been interviewed by the Associated Press, Time, Newsweek, People, the Boston Globe, USA Today, the Los Angeles Times, and Newsday, among other print publications, as well as "Voice of America," the "Today" show, MSNBC, and NPR's "All Things Considered," "Tell Me More," and "Talk of the Nation." She is the author or co-author of many books, including The Prayer Wheel; Flunking Sainthood; What Would Buffy Do?; Mormonism for Dummies; and The Writer's Market Guide to Getting Published. Her book The Twible: All the Chapters of the Bible in 140 Characters or Less . . . . Now with 68% More Humor! won first place in the non-fiction category in the Writer's Digest Annual Self-Published Book Awards. Her book The Next Mormons: The Rising Generation of Latter-day Saints will be released in March 2019 from Oxford University Press. She is a senior columnist for Religion News Service.

This week, attorney, author and Enneagram 7, Bob Goff shares how committing to therapy gave him a common language to better understand and communicate with others. We explore the importance of finding safe people to be authentic with and build deeper, more meaningful relationships. He offers incredible perceptions for Sevens and valuable insights that we can all apply to our lives. Bob Goff is the author of Undistracted (March 1, 2022) as well as the New York Times bestselling books Love Does, Everybody Always, and Dream Big. He is the Honorary Consul to the Republic of Uganda, an attorney, and the founder of Love Does—a nonprofit human rights organization operating in Uganda, India, Nepal, Iraq, and Somalia. He's a lover of balloons, cake pops, and helping people pursue their big dreams. You can typically find Bob writing and taking calls from his boat, welcoming people to his Southern California retreat center--The Oaks, or at an event speaking. Bob's greatest ambitions in life are to love others, do stuff, and, most importantly, to hold hands with his wife, Sweet Maria Goff, and spend time with their amazing kids. For more, check out BobGoff.com and LoveDoes.org.

Every personality style has a story that includes a catalog of false beliefs about themselves and the world. But what happens when you take those false beliefs and pain from your younger years and turn them into purpose? Our guest today, award-winning personal trainer and host of the Adversity Advantage podcast, Doug Bopst, explains how he went from hopeless and emotionally bankrupt to helping others overcome adversity to achieve greatness. His inspiring story of transformation is a prime example of what happens when we learn to re-interpret our past and choose to lean into a new narrative.

If we're trying to change a million things about ourselves at once, we're only going to find ourselves feeling overwhelmed and discouraged. So, what do we do? Today on Typology, I'm going to walk you through the daily practice I use to help me change the false beliefs and old messages that support and perpetuate my old, broken story. I call it my "New Story Jar." My New Story Jar contains slips of paper with a new message on each that I'm trying to integrate into my life. I pull one (and only one!) of these slips out each day and work on incorporating the new message or belief written on it into my life. That's it—one new belief or practice that I work on each day that helps support my journey toward living a new and better story. And it can work for you too! What you write on the slips is entirely up to you. For example, right now I'm working through my struggle with fear, so one of my slips states, "Do not be afraid." Another asks the question, "What would I do if I wasn't afraid right now?" You get the idea, but here are a few more examples to get your New Story Jar started: Today, I will make mistakes, and that's okay. Just say no. The present moment contains everything I need to be happy. Disappointing others is a misdemeanor, not a felony. Difficult feelings won't kill me. At first, your New Story Jar doesn't need a million slips in it, but you'll be surprised how quickly your jar fills up. One new message or belief that we reflect on, and practice daily gradually will change us! As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Sow a thought, and you reap an action; sow an act, and you reap a habit; sow a habit, and you reap a character; sow a character, and you reap a destiny." Want to make your own? Click here to download a few statements you can use to start your own jar today! Cheers, Ian

How do you find your "perfect match" during a pandemic? Over the past two years, dating etiquette has changed and transparent and to-the-point conversations out of the gate are now welcome. More singles are making time for self-reflection, therapy, and finally figuring out what they want in a relationship. So, what role does the Enneagram play in helping people develop deeper, more meaningful connections? Today's guest, Global Chief Marketing Officer of OkCupid, Melissa Hobley, joins me to explore different Enneagram types in relationships and how she sees the Enneagram being used in dating. Melissa shares a few basic tips for dating and gives two important insider tips, before asking Ian a few questions of her own. Melissa Hobley is the Global Chief Marketing Officer of OkCupid, one of the largest dating apps in the world. Under her direction, OkCupid has become famous for its message of inclusion and affirmation, winning numerous awards for its breakthrough social campaign. In this role, she is responsible for global brand advertising, marketing, social media, and partnerships. Melissa was the first CMO at OkCupid and brought the brand from decline to being one of the foremost leaders in a competitive space. She regularly appears as an expert on tech and relationships in media like The New York Times and NPR. Currently, she is a regular guest on NBC's "Today Show" discussing relationships in a digital era. She's on the list of "Forbes Most Influential CMOs in the World," is on AdAge's "Women to Watch" list, and was recently featured on AMA's "40 Under 40." (AMA= Americian Marketing Association).

How do you repair that which is broken? You must first be willing to see the truth. We all have broken stories that directly impact the choices we make today. But, when we take the time to reflect on and see the whole truth of who we are, only then can we choose to do things differently. Only then can we craft a new narrative…one that is fueled by forgiveness, kindness, and love. Activist, author, and founder of Freedom Project, Lisa Sharon Harper shines light on the connection between the choices we make and the stories we tell ourselves, reminding us that truth-telling, repentance, and forgiveness are just a few basic things that can begin the process of healing a nation. Leading activist, author and founder of the consulting group Freedom Road, Lisa Sharon Harper has spent three decades researching ten generations of her family history through DNA research, oral histories, interviews and genealogy. In her new book, Fortune: How Race Broke My Family and the World—and How to Repair It All (Brazos Press, February 8, 2022), Harper draws on her lifelong journey to know her family's history to recover the beauty of her heritage, expose the brokenness that race has wrought in America, and cast a vision for collective repair. Her work has been featured in the New Yorker, Relevant, Essence, HuffPost, The National Civic Review, and CNN, and she has appeared on PBS's Religion & Ethics NewsWeekly, TV One, Fox News, NPR, and Al Jazeera America.

How does the Enneagram help you grow spiritually? We've indirectly touched on this on Typology but I've always wanted to specifically explore the Enneagram as a useful tool for profound spiritual formation. Today, pastor, Enneagram teacher, and author AJ Sherrill joins me to talk about the Enneagram and Spiritualty. With two Master's in Theology and a Doctorate in the area of Spiritual Formation, AJ shares spiritual practices each type can adopt to gain clarity and access to a more virtuous life. AJ teaches courses on preaching and also the Enneagram at Fuller Theological Seminary, offers workshops on spiritual formation around the world.

Each Enneagram Type occupies a story about who they are and how they think the world works. The Enneagram Nine's story is built around the mistaken belief that they're not really as important as other people, or sometimes it's just that other people just seem to have more energy and investment in their own opinions, preferences, desires, and viewpoints than Nines do. Coupled with their desire to preserve connections with other people and preserve inner and outer peace, Nines adopt a strategy of avoiding conflict and merging with others. The risk of this story is that they can become self-less…without a self. The healing journey for the Peacemaker is to decouple themselves from that story to rewrite a new one. So, today, one of my favorite singer-songwriters on the planet and long-time student of the Enneagram, Andy Gullahorn joins me in the studio for a conversation about how the Enneagram has helped guide his healing and growth. In this episode we talk about: Character defects or defenses Doing Enneagram work in community Finding a different relationship with anger, and Learning to feel things and form opinions in real-time He also shares a special Enneagram song during the interview. You're going to love it! Cheers, Ian

As you can imagine, when you're in the middle of a book launch, you talk to your publisher quite frequently. One of the things that kept coming up in our conversations was a desire to serve our Typology listeners with some great content from my new book. After batting some ideas back and forth, we finally decided on what I think is a great 'thank you' to our loyal listeners…. and that is to do a bonus episode of Typology where we actually include an entire chapter of the audiobook version of The Story of You. In this episode, you'll hear the entire first chapter of The Story of You, recorded by yours truly from a beautiful studio here in Nashville. Recording an audiobook is really one of the coolest parts of writing a book, so I'm very excited to be able to share a sneak peek of that with you all! We'll have another great episode coming your way on Thursday with my friend Andy Gullahorn. Stay tuned for that episode and if you like what you hear of the audiobook, please consider heading over to Audible and picking up an audiobook copy of The Story of You.