

The Non-Anxious Leader Podcast
Jack Shitama
The Non-Anxious Leader Podcast uses a family systems theory approach to increase your spiritual, emotional and physical well-being so you can be the best leader possible. Each episode explores research and practical tips to help you be a personal and professional non-anxious presence.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Dec 2, 2019 • 18min
Episode 47: The Year End Review (with a Family Systems Take)
The most effective leaders do a year-end review. Here are three approaches, including the one that I use. Doing a year-end review will take you about an hour. It will not only help you make the most of your 2019 experiences, it will help you prepare to get a great start in 2020.
This month's theme in The Non-Anxious Leader Network is "Reflection." If you're not a member, join our free community to reflect on 2019 and focus on what matters most to you in 2020.
Show Notes:
Forget New Year’s Resolutions and Conduct a ‘Past Year Review’ Instead by Tim Ferriss
Advice for Entering the New Year: The Yearly Review by Matt Perman
Reviewing the Past Year & Looking Ahead to the Coming Year by Kathy Paauw
One New Habit, One Big Goal: Change Your Life in 10 Weeks by Jack Shitama
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Nov 25, 2019 • 14min
Episode 46: Origin Stories and Family Narratives (the Holidays are coming)
Sharing "origin" stories and family narratives makes a family stronger. The holidays are an especially good time to make this happen. Whether you're asking the right questions or sharing your stories, doing this will help everybody relax and connect with each other.
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Show Notes:
The Psychology Behind Superhero Origin Stories by Robin Rosenberg
The Stories That Bind Us by Bruce Feiler
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Nov 18, 2019 • 16min
Episode 45: Understanding Free Will and Self-Regulation (the Holidays Are Coming)
Yuval Noah Harari maintains that the greatest threat to freedom is the myth of free will. This episode examines free will to understand how we can better self-regulate in anxious situations.
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Show Notes:
The Myth of Freedom by Yuval Noah Harari

Nov 11, 2019 • 17min
Episode 44: Four Rules for Political Discourse (and another look at Donald Trump's leadership style)
Effective leaders are able to say what they believe while giving others the freedom to disagree. The Gottman Institute offers four rules to guide political discussions. Arthur C. Brooks offers these to help end what he describes our culture of contempt. This episode unpacks these from a family systems perspective, as well as takes another look at President Donald Trump's leadership style in the midst of an impeachment inquiry.
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Show Notes:
Gottman’s Four Rules for a Better America by Michael Fulwiler of The Gottman Institute
Love Your Enemies: How Decent People Can Save America from Our Culture of Contempt by Arthur C. Brooks
Episode 35: Sabotage and Empathy (What Works and What Doesn’t)
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Nov 4, 2019 • 17min
Episode 43: Four Relationship Warning Signs (and How to Deal with Them)
Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling are signs that a relationship is going downhill. Maintaing self-differentiation and a non-anxious presence can turn things around.
Show Notes:
The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling by Ellie Lisitsa of The Gottman Institute
The Four Horsemen: The Antidotes by Ellie Lisitsa of The Gottman Institute
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Oct 28, 2019 • 20min
Episode 42: Effective Leaders Trust Self and Others
Trust is a key leadership competency. Developing a culture of trust requires trusting self, then trusting others.
Show Notes:
Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue by Edwin Friedman
The Fundamental Attribution Error
Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard by Chip and Dan Heath
The Moral Molecule: How Trust Works by Paul J. Zak
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Oct 21, 2019 • 21min
Episode 41: Interview with Bill Selby, Family Systems Expert (Part 3 of 3)
Bill Selby is the founder of the Center for Pastoral Effectiveness for the Rockies. He has been training clergy for 20 years to apply family systems theory in their leadership. In this segment, he discusses how to stay connected to anxious people, how to avoid isolation, and the impact of change.
Show Notes:
Center for Pastoral Effectiveness of the Rockies
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Oct 14, 2019 • 24min
Episode 40: Interview with Bill Selby, Family Systems Expert (Part 2 of 3)
Bill Selby is the founder of the Center for Pastoral Effectiveness of the Rockies. In this segment, he talks about how to deal with sabotage in the context of a church meeting.
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Oct 7, 2019 • 24min
Episode 39: Interview with Bill Selby, Family Systems Expert (Part 1 of 3)
Bill Selby is the founder of the Center for Pastoral Effectiveness of the Rockies. He has been training clergy in how to be a non-anxious leader since 1999. This is part one of a three part interview. In today's segment, Bill shares the importance of staying connected, process and content, and identifying healthy leaders.
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Sep 30, 2019 • 19min
Episode 38: Spiral Dynamics, Richard Rohr and the Problem We Face
Spiral dynamics is a model that helps us understand both human and societal development. The challenge of the 21st century is finding unity in the midst of ever-growing diversity. Understanding family systems can help.
Show Notes:
Stages of Social Development: The Cultural Dynamics that Spark Violence, Spread Prosperity, and Shape Globalization by Don Edward Beck, Ph. D.
The Liturgists Podcast, Episode 5: Spiral Dynamics
Fr. Richard Rohr – The One and The Many
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