Invest In Your Life

Financial decisions can be tricky. Some people buy whatever they want no matter what the consequences. Others won't spend on anything unless they need it, even if they have the funds. Other people feel like they should do certain things and follow an invisible unwritten rulebook. Other people reward themselves whenever they need a little boost, even if their hard work or exhaustion isn't correlated with the purchase, reward, or the funds to pay for it. The above behaviors fall into one of four buckets that drive financial decisions. Some people fall into one or the other. Some people may be a combination. Things can get confusing when one spouse is one, and the other spouse is a different one. James breaks down these four categories and how they drive our financial decisions. Then he shares ways to look at things differently to have a more balanced outlook and decision-making process. Episode Highlights: [02:52] Frugal people often draw the line at needs. If they don't need it, they're not going to get it. This teaches ourselves that wanting things isn't allowed and is somehow selfish and reckless. [04:02] Living at this level is restrictive and resentment can build up. People get stuck in avoiding expenses that could be looked at as frivolous. People at this level also have to make the argument that what they want is something they need to justify the expense. [06:29] There's anxiety around justifying a want as a need. [06:59] The disconnect creates a sense of discomfort. People stuck in this story have to make everything a need. [07:38] Closely related to the need story is the should story. We get stuck feeling like we have to live according to a manual. We should buy this type of house or give to this type of organization. We have a sense of obligation to a set of predetermined roles. [08:33] These people are constantly feeling like they don't have a choice, because they're choosing what they're told they should be choosing. [09:04] They are stuck in the shoulds with rules that are really hard to follow. The rulebook says that you're not allowed. [13:31] People driven by the want story have a want driven response. They are the ones that end up spending money they don't have or get buyer's remorse. [13:59] They medicate the buyer's remorse with more wants and get stuck in the cycle. [15:28] Related to the want is the deserve bucket. We tell ourselves that the want is okay. I've been working hard, I deserve this huge vacation. [16:15] A lot of times the sacrifice isn't saving or earning, it's just a form of exhaustion. It's not untrue, but it doesn't change the fact that you haven't done the work to be ready to purchase whatever you want to get. [19:13] We are either in trouble or have overworked and over committed when stuck in the deserve cycle. [19:44] Need-driven: acknowledge that we all have wants. We're allowed to acknowledge a want. [21:19] The should-driven people need to question where this rule came from. Is this rule for the life that I want to lead or the life that someone else is telling me I should lead? [21:36] We really want to move away from rules and on to family values. Values will give us a framework to make decisions. [22:36] Want oriented people need to get out of the emotional response cycle. They need to get to a place where they have thought ahead of time. Be intentional and have a plan. [24:13] People driven by deserve need to change the cycle. Instead of being exhausted and spending to soothe yourself, get to a place where you don't get over exhausted in the first place. [25:07] Stop justifying your story, because you earned it. Stop earning it. Stop giving yourself that story by having more balance. Resources & Links Related to this Episode Wealthquest Get Started Living a Rich Life: The No-Regrets Guide to Building and Spending Wealth Need, Should, Want, Deserve: Which Drives Your Life?

So much of our lives are intertwined with money, but relationships truly make us rich. Loneliness and lack of connection have worsened as we've come out of the pandemic. James finds this alarming yet fascinating. He talks about how to foster connections and experience the richness of relationships and connections in our workplace and communities. Relationships are so meaningful that we need to spend more time, effort, and money building them. We need to prioritize getting to a place of connection. We must ask if we are fostering and experiencing meaning in our connections. A Harvard research survey showed that 61% of young people between 18 and 25 reported feeling lonely frequently or all the time. 51% of young children's mothers feel lonely almost all the time. A broader survey showed the numbers around 50%, which is still high. James talks about how to address this loneliness epidemic. Episode Highlights: [05:27] James wants us to recognize that this trend isn't getting better as we come out of the pandemic. The pandemic may not even be the cause of these feelings of loneliness. [06:49] Most of us have exposure to relationships in our work. If employees were lonely even before they were sent to do work from home, we have a problem. [07:18] We know a lot of people, but we lack meaningful connection. Are we experiencing meaning in our connections? [08:12] The three components that create deep connections include structural support, functional support, and quality support. Structural support is being surrounded by people in our immediate environment. [09:12] Functional support is feeling like we have co-workers who care about our struggles and understand our successes. [09:43] Quality support is just the positive or negative tone of our interactions. [11:25] For most of us, the three-legged stool is lopsided. How do we foster deeper connections where we have structural support? [13:29] The more connected we are, the more efficient we'll be. The less lonely we feel, the more productive we will become. [14:10] Creating space for connection at a business might feel like wasting money, but it's the most important money you can spend. [14:47] We need to build authenticity, vulnerability, and compassion into the environment. [16:28] We need more casual conversations that take us deeper than just the how are you. [17:18] Build questions into your repertoire to foster connection. Level 1 questions include: What's been the highlight of your day? Are you working on anything interesting? [19:44] We need to train ourselves and our leaders and teams on how to dig deeper and have harder conversations with each other. Prioritize active listening skills and emotional intelligence. Resources & Links Related to this Episode Wealthquest Get Started Living a Rich Life: The No-Regrets Guide to Building and Spending Wealth Register for the Advanced Estate Planning Webinar on October 20th Loneliness in America: How the Pandemic Has Deepened an Epidemic of Loneliness and What We Can Do About It New Survey Shows Increasing Loneliness, Including on the Job Loneliness and social isolation as risk factors for mortality: a meta-analytic review Vanessa Van Edwards

Are your kids economically literate? This is a question that James has been asking himself lately. Do they understand economics? It's critical to comprehend economics for everyone's future success. James is going to talk about why being economically literate matters and how to become economically literate. There is so much negative information being put out there about our economy. James isn't afraid because he understands how our incredible economy works. This episode is about making our kids economically literate so that they will be less susceptible to the influence of negative news and predictions about our economy. The more knowledge our kids have, the less fear they will have! Episode Highlights: [03:53] James is a huge believer in understanding how finances work. He teaches kids financial literacy through the bank of mom and dad. [04:20] As parents, we need our kids to understand how money works. [05:01] With all of the current news about the economy, it's more important than ever for kids to be economically literate. We are constantly being bombarded with threats and worries about the future of our economy. [05:38] By understanding the terms, you can have a more balanced reaction towards all the fear being thrown at you. [06:32] Our incredible economy has self-governing systems embedded in it already. The more knowledge you have, the less fear you will accept. [07:30] We need to set our kids up to be economically literate, so they aren't as afraid. [08:11] Kids grow in economic literacy the same way they grow in financial literacy and that is through exposure. [09:49] Conversations about income taxes can help with fears about tax rates going up. Parents also need economic literacy to help with their own fear. [10:47] In the past 22 years, there have been so many different changes in the tax code. The actual impact of these changes has only been about 1%. [12:09] One thing we can have confidence in is that things haven't really changed that much from a tax standpoint. The rules have changed a ton. [13:05] Being economically literate is understanding what inflation is. In our last 10 years prices have only gone up about 30%. In the grand scheme of things, it's right on trend. Being economically literate buys confidence and stability. [14:53] Different people have different economic circumstances, and it's good to be exposed to everyone. Understanding poverty and being exposed to people in those situations is also part of economic literacy. [16:12] James is passionate about kids having a framework to understand economics and the current state of our economy. Economics should be a required course. People should understand supply and demand, economics, and everything that goes into our incredible system. [17:20] Are you economically literate enough to have these conversations with your kids? Ask questions about what people are afraid of. Resources & Links Related to this Episode Wealthquest Get Started Living a Rich Life: The No-Regrets Guide to Building and Spending Wealth Episode 4 // Teaching Kids About Money By Letting Them Fail Register for the Advanced Estate Planning Webinar on October 20th The Psychology Of Money: Timeless Lessons On Wealth, Greed, And Happiness Predictably Irrational, Revised and Expanded Edition: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions

A lively dive into how the architecture of choice steers our spending and decisions. Fun thought experiments reveal mental accounting and why identical costs feel different. Social belonging and social-proof nudges are shown as powerful motivators. Practical ideas on reframing norms and flipping the script to steer behavior in your favor.

We recently received a listener question from a couple that's just getting started in their marriage. They wanted to know how to manage their finances. Should things be managed separately? Should they split the bills? What's the right way to approach finances as a married couple? This is a topic that James runs into quite a bit as he meets young couples that are just getting started. Older generations usually put everything into one big pot. People who get married young usually default to this. When people marry later, their finances are already established, and things get tricky. James breaks down staying mine and yours or making everything ours. Episode Highlights: [02:55] Many couples now wait to get married and already have established households, budgets, and accumulated retirement savings. [03:30] This can be tricky when people with experience have to merge their finances with another person. More couples are coming together, but keeping things separate almost like a roommate structure. [04:23] It's hard to let go of that sense of control and identity, but stepping into marriage is stepping into oneness. [05:04] A recent study looking at 38,000 participants, found that couples who put everything together are happier and less likely to break up. [06:18] James has found that couples that he's seen pool their finances do tend to be more successful. [06:44] When we think of resources as mine and yours, we retain individual identities which makes it easier to split up again. [07:18] Control issues are common with couples that keep their finances separate. Another issue is one partner may not want to carry the other partner's debt or mistakes. [09:22] People often blame money for why they split up. The way people approach money can be rooted and what's already wrong with their relationship. The way money is handled can be rooted in control issues or broken shame. [10:47] Fairness is not part of the deal when it comes to marriage. Marriage isn't always 50/50. Sometimes it's 100/0. [11:42] The benefit of facing the world together with an ours mentality was greater for couples with less money. The sense of unity and shared burden is one of the reasons we get married. [14:16] Couples with shared finances also had more positive interactions and better connections. It affected how they spoke to each other. [16:38] If your finances are separate and your marriage is working, you should be moving towards shared finances. It's the safest and most peaceful place. [17:35] Everything can be in a common pot, but each person can have a spending account just for them. [19:01] You want to balance the two but still have a little bit of selfishness and joy where you can spend on what you want to spend on. Find balance and think about why you haven't moved to an ours mentality. Resources & Links Related to this Episode Wealthquest Get Started Pooling Finances And Relationship Satisfaction

Sunk costs are a mental trap that we can easily fall into. We can convince ourselves that we somehow have to make up for or recover from some mistake that we've made. We must make good on that deal or fix that problem before moving forward. The ultimate irony is that focusing on sunk costs keeps us from moving forward. James will talk about why sunk costs are such a block for us and how to get to a place where we can move forward and stop getting stuck in mental traps that we can't change. The economic definition of sunk costs is a cost that is not productive and can't be recovered. In personal finance, we get emotionally attached to sunk costs and want to repair them. James talks about why moving on is a better option. Episode Highlights: [02:07] Sunk costs is an economic term that means a cost that has been incurred that was not productive and cannot be recovered. [03:13] In personal finance, we don't identify things as sunk costs, instead we identify them as mistakes. It would actually be helpful to think of mistakes as sunk costs. [04:12] The reason sunk costs in personal finance is so painful is because we are paying for it long after it has been realized in the form of debt. [06:10] It's better to evaluate decisions going forward and find your next right steps. [06:57] Sunk costs can't be recovered, so stop trying. We get emotionally attached to sunk costs and convince ourselves that we have to somehow repair them. [08:29] We need to understand our reality today with less of a focus talking about yesterday. We need to make decisions in the present that will impact our future. [09:21] The sunk costs fallacy is a cognitive bias where we continue to pursue things that haven't been working and won't work. We've put so much into these things it's hard to stop. [10:39] When we make decisions from the past, we actually recreate the past. We turn our future into a version of those same past mistakes. [11:53] We get focused on the story we tell ourselves about the past and then we get committed to it. [14:04] Your past self may have given you a gift that is really valuable. Maybe the season of this gift has come to an end. [15:53] A different experience and a growing awareness can change your outcome. What has your past self given you whether they are gifts you haven't used or mistakes? Move towards the direction of what your future self wants and don't beat yourself up over sunk costs. [18:22] The best gift you can give your future self is freedom from sunk costs in your past! Resources & Links Related to this Episode Wealthquest Get Started Seth Godin Episode 121 Visualizing Your Future Self with Adam Day

Inflation is a constant conversation right now. It's all over the news and media. People want to know how bad it will get and what it means. What is the Fed going to do about it? James will talk about the practical understanding of inflation and how to think about it in this environment. We also need to understand what this talk about inflation does to our minds. We need to realize how it impacts and influences our behaviors. The last time we saw inflation this high was in the 1980s. Many listeners have no context for dealing with an inflationary period. James helps us understand inflation better to avoid panic, fear, and anxiety. Episode Highlights: [02:09] We haven't experienced inflation like this since the 1980s. A lot of people have fear and anxiety about the future. [03:07] Things don't go forever in the direction that they are going. Our economy is incredibly diverse and robust. It's constantly pushing and pulling in different directions. There are self-correcting forces that end up moving the trend line. [04:08] When we see all of these headlines, keep in mind, the world didn't end in the 1980s. The economy is a lot stronger and durable than we think it is. [05:40] Inflation happens when there's too many dollars chasing too few goods. We just had a season with a lot of money out there. [06:16] We've also had supply constraints at the same time. We also saw commodities spike when Russia invaded Ukraine. [07:24] What we think inflation is going to do actually drives a lot of the inflation that we are experiencing. [08:19] The Fed helps alleviate inflation by raising interest rates and getting money out of the system. The main reason this works is that injecting uncertainty creates an economic recession. [09:57] Consumers are beginning to behave differently and shrink their consumption. A lot of this happens just by the Fed talking. [11:06] When we start to think that things are going to get bad our expectation of inflation goes down, because we assume we're going to have a recession. [11:43] We are starting to see the self-fulfilling prophecies come true. We saw an inflation spike. We've now seen it start to alleviate. The next step is that we will probably shrink back too far and underspend. [12:43] We predict there will be less unemployment which will soften the recession. [13:16] How does this compare to past experience? [14:18] What everyone is missing is that in the 1980s when rates went up really high it was coming off the back of a 10-year cycle of problematic inflation. [15:57] In the last 10 years, we haven't had hardly any inflation. It hasn't been an unstoppable 10-year cycle like in 1981 and 1982. [16:38] Please don't panic. Let out your fear and recognize the reality of about average inflation. [17:53] Don't overreact and tighten the belt too far. [19:43] Moving to an economic cycle where things seem normal would be great. Resources & Links Related to this Episode Wealthquest Get Started

Planning for retirement lifestyle, not just finances, takes center stage. The conversation highlights couples balancing financial literacy so both partners understand cash flow. Debt strategies and tax consequences get called out as common pitfalls. Purpose, health planning, and testing locations and gradual transitions are presented as ways to make retirement smoother and more fulfilling.

What makes relationships work? The answer, as it turns out, isn't that different across personal and professional relationships. In this week's short and sweet episode, James discovers the Gottman Ratio and what it means for your relationships. Listen now! To learn more about The Rich Life Book + Coaching, visit www.LivingARichLife.com. This podcast is brought to you by Wealthquest. Learn more at www.wqcorp.com

Go forth and get nothing done, James says. You might have expected a post-pandemic, post-lockdown world to move a bit slower, but it somehow pushed us deeper into the need for productivity! In this week's episode, James looks at the ways we define ourselves by our output, how we can go against this impulse, and 4 questions to help you maintain a healthier mindset. Listen now! To learn more about The Rich Life Book + Coaching, visit www.LivingARichLife.com. This podcast is brought to you by Wealthquest. Learn more at www.wqcorp.com