Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell

With Valentine's Day, just around the corner, I've been thinking a lot about what does it mean to really love my wife, and to love well? In this bonus episode, we pulled a favorite clip from our archive with Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, therapist-turned-coach, longtime mentor, and returning guest on the podcast, in which we asked her: "What does it mean to cherish your spouse?" Her answer is thoughtful, wise, actionable, and hopeful as she teaches how to build truly loving marriages. Resources and Events Don't miss this amazing opportunity to love and make love with your spouse better! Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps (Valentine's Intimacy Challenge started on Feb 1!): https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/ Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/ Get Your Marriage On Cruise: https://getyourmarriageon.com/cruise/ We had a cancellation for our retreat in the spring! Snatch this spot while you can! https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/ Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Ten practical habits that build lasting sexual momentum in marriage. Planning playful time and regular marriage meetings to prioritize connection. Small daily intimacy challenges, naked time, and non-demand arousal practices. Open conversations about sex and a collaborative sexy bucket list. Budgeted date nights, regular getaways, humility and forgiveness, removing negative influences, and inviting faith into the relationship.

It's much more common to be comfortable being the giver in sex than the receiver. In this episode, we explore why learning to relax and receive your spouse may be one of the most vulnerable and transformative skills in intimate marriage. Many couples know how to "get through" sex. Fewer know how to slow down, stay present, and experience deep emotional and physical connection together and they open up and receive. Dan shares how a simple "orgasmic meditation" practice can really increase the emotional and physical connection you share, even without traditional intercourse. Resources and Events Get the free Orgasmic Meditation guide over on our Instagram account: @getyourmarriageon Don't miss this amazing opportunity to love and make love with your spouse better! Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway-Early bird pricing ends January 31! (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps (Valentine's Intimacy Challenge started on Feb 1!): https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/ Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/ Get Your Marriage On Cruise: https://getyourmarriageon.com/cruise/ We had a cancellation for our retreat in the spring! Snatch this spot while you can! https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/

Most couples spend years trying to change the very things in their spouse that will never change — and then feel frustrated, discouraged, or disconnected when nothing improves. Or they wonder why their attempts at connecting intimately fall flat. In this episode, Dan sits down with Dr. Denim Slade, creator of the C.O.R.E. Temperament model, to talk about something deeper than personality: temperament — the unchanging emotional wiring that shapes how we love, connect, and experience sex. You'll learn: The difference between personality and temperament (and why it matters) The four core temperaments that emerged from Dr. Slade's research Why each temperament experiences sex, desire, and intimacy differently How misunderstanding temperament creates unnecessary sexual tension What healthy vs. unhealthy versions of each temperament look like in the bedroom How to stop fighting what won't change — and start amplifying what already works By the end of this episode, you'll have a clearer understanding of yourself, your spouse, and how to build deeper emotional and sexual intimacy by working with your wiring instead of against it. Resources and Events Dr. Slade's free episode worksheet Don't miss this amazing opportunity to love and make love with your spouse better! Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway-Early bird pricing ends January 31! (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps (Valentine's Intimacy Challenge starts on Feb 1!): https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/ Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/ Get Your Marriage On Cruise: https://getyourmarriageon.com/cruise/ Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Have you ever worked so hard to fix a problem in your marriage, only to find yourself right back in the same place weeks later? Most couples don't struggle because they aren't trying. They struggle because they're putting a lot of effort into changes that can't create lasting results. In this episode, Dan explains what it actually means to work smarter on your marriage, not harder. Drawing from systems theory, personal experience, and real coaching stories, he shows why some changes help temporarily while others lead to real, lasting transformation. He breaks down the difference between first-order change (doing more or less of the same things) and second-order change (upgrading the rules your relationship is operating on). You'll learn how to recognize when you're stuck in surface-level fixes, how to identify the unspoken "rules" your marriage is operating by, and what it looks like to make changes at the level that truly creates growth—especially around intimacy, desire differences, and recurring conflict. Resources Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat/ Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/ Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps (Valentine's Intimacy Challenge coming up!): https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/

What if ADHD isn't a bug in your marriage — but a feature? In this episode of the Get Your Marriage On Podcast, I sit down with Kamden Hainsworth, an ADHD coach and host of the Busy Brained Saint, to unpack how ADHD uniquely impacts desire, intimacy, novelty, rejection sensitivity, and emotional regulation in marriage. Kamden shares her mid-life burn out, late ADHD diagnosis, and how understanding her brain completely transformed her marriage and sex life. Together, they explore why ADHD can amplify desire differences, why boredom feels unbearable in intimacy, how rejection sensitivity dysphoria shows up in sex, and how novelty can be a powerful connector (when done with trust and communication). Whether you're the ADHD partner or married to one, this conversation offers clarity, compassion, and practical insight into building a more playful, honest, and deeply connected sexual relationship. Resources 101 Ways to Initiate Sex The Sexploration List Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/ Men's Only and Women's Only Cohorts (starting this week): https://getyourmarriageon.com/events/ Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps (Valentine's Intimacy Challenge coming up!): https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/ Guest Links Kamden ADHD coaching Instagram: @kamden_adhd @thebusybrainedsaint Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Dan Purcell, a sex and intimacy coach and creator of the Intimately Us app, dives deep into the nuances of pursuing intimacy in marriage. He explains the critical difference between pressure and genuine desire, highlighting how emotional connection fosters attraction. Dan candidly discusses the importance of honest communication and the impact of masking feelings. He also shares practical tips to enhance intimacy, including understanding erotic types and the power of self-reflection, making it a must-listen for couples seeking deeper connections.

Roberth and Laticia share their journey from empty sex to a thriving emotional connection. They discuss the struggles of differing sexual desires and the complications that arose after a decade of marriage. Misunderstandings and therapy setbacks brought them clarity through learning about female anatomy and pleasure. Discovering the difference between responsive and spontaneous desire transformed their intimacy. They provide practical tips on honest communication, owning desires, and maintaining emotional connection, offering hope for couples feeling stuck.

Explore the secrets to exceptional intimacy, focusing on presence and awareness. Learn how to enhance your connection through practices like tantra and energy work. Discover the importance of morning intentions for building desire and the playful art of communication without shame. Gain insights on body confidence and the transformative power of candid discussions about desires. From practical tips for playful encounters to daily rituals for connection, this guide invites couples to deepen their romantic journey.

If you've ever felt not good enough, feared rejection, or found yourself reacting in ways you don't even understand, this episode is for you. Marriage & family therapist Trevor (Art of Healing by Trevor) explains why so many couples get stuck in cycles of pursuit, shutdown, anxiety, and disconnection — and the emotional transformation required to break free. This conversation is raw, restorative, and deeply practical. In this episode you'll learn: Why fear of abandonment and "I'm not enough" beliefs show up in marriage The two classic patterns: people-pleasing pursuer + shut-down withdrawer How emotional safety outside the bedroom changes intimacy inside it How to work with your inner child to create real healing A step-by-step framework for emotional transformation How secure partners show up differently in sex, connection, and conflict Why awareness alone isn't enough — and what actually creates change Guest Links Instagram: @theartofhealingbytrevor Website: theartofhealingbytrevor.com Resources and Events Apply for the Get Your Marriage On! Program: getyourmarriageon.com/program In-Person Retreat April 2025 (We're sold out, but you can apply to get on the waitlist!) NEW Get Your Marriage On! Cruise: October 2026 Valentine's Day Weekend Virtual Retreat Men's and Women's Only Cohorts starting in January! Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.