Leading Saints Podcast

This is a rebroadcast. The episode originally ran in January 2018. Terryl L. Givens, PhD, did graduate work in Intellectual History at Cornell and studied Comparative Literature at UNC Chapel Hill. He taught courses in Romanticism, nineteenth century cultural studies, and the Bible and Literature and was the Jabez A. Bostwick Professor of English at the University of Richmond. Currently, he is a Neal L. Maxwell Senior Fellow at Brigham Young University. He has published in literary theory, British and European Romanticism, Mormon studies, and intellectual history. Terryl has authored or edited 20+ books, and some of his favorites include his collaborations with his wife, Fiona. Together they are the authors of The God Who Weeps, The Crucible of Doubt, The Christ Who Heals, and All Things New. Baptized initially in the Presbyterian faith by his minister grandfather, Terryl and his family joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints when Terryl was eight or nine. He served as a missionary in Brazil and has served as a bishop. Whether hosting insightful podcasts for Faith Matters or speaking to saints the world over at intimate firesides, Terryl’s mission is to help everyone–no matter where they are in their journey of faith–come closer to Jesus Christ. Highlights 4:30 Terryl’s background and work experience. 6:20 Religious background and faith development. 10:20 How Terryl met his wife, Fiona. The early years of marriage and having kids. 13:45 Terryl’s unlikely journey to becoming an author and his father’s collection of 19th-century anti-LDS literature. The impact of learning The Book of Mormon was the most widely-produced book, other than the Bible 16:50 Books are no longer the primary vehicle for disseminating information. Terryl’s podcast is about his desire to celebrate intellectual and theological richness of Mormonism. 19:20 There is not one typical Mormon testimony; finding one’s own path in coming to Christ. 20:30 Called as bishop in Richmond the week of 9/11. 21:30 Advice Terryl received when he got called as bishop. As a bishop, you occupy a position with enormous ability to make a difference in people’s lives. Be aware of the power of the mantle you wear. One small look or gesture can completely change someone’s Sabbath experience. 22:45 Terryl and his counselors focused on personal interaction as a bishopric. No one left the chapel without encountering the bishop or one of the counselors. They made visits to everyone in the ward in the first year. He made appointments with every single young person. 24:30 Dealing with faith and emotional crises.Terryl didn’t always know how to help people but the number one thing he learned to do as a bishop was to be empathetic. Stop trying to fix it. Just listen and validate them. 30:00 Helping people with difficult faith questions. Listen to the questions people have without interjecting yourself with your own faith position. Terryl shares personal experiences he has had helping people with faith crises. 35:15 As a leader, have the courage to refer someone to a person with more expertise. Be careful about trying to shut off sources of intellectual inquiry. 38:00 Many in the church criminalize doubt. Elder Hugh B. Brown says, “We all have to serve an apprenticeship in doubt on the way to discipleship.” Doubt is a phase on the way to finding something richer. However, people shouldn’t stay in that attitude of doubt. 39:35 Faithful trust instead of certain knowledge. Believe vs know. 44:15 Scriptural examples of individuals having faith without absolute knowledge. It’s ok to say I don’t know. 46:35 Asking genuine questions in adult Sunday school classes. The importance of truly-spiritual gospel doctrine class teachers. 50:30 Is there resistance to addressing questions head-on? In the long run, how will church members be fortified? Terryl shares his experience about being “shut down” in the U.K. when he was teaching. 53:00 What is holy envy? Terryl says that his holy envy is of faiths that see the role of art and literature as sacred vehicles. President Kimball said, “When God didn’t have prophets he spoke through poets.” 55:30 The essence of discipleship is the recognition that we are all wounded and hurting in some way. There is no one whose life can’t be made better by a shared concern. Nearly everyone carries some type of burden. Links TerrylGivens.com Books authored by Terryl The Sin of Certainty: Why God Desires Our Trust More Than Our “Correct” Beliefs Men are From Mars Women are From Venus Read the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast Listen on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library

Tyson Bradley is the future #1 New York Times bestselling author of the book Reclaim Your Inherent Identity: The 5 Steps To Bypass Your Brain and Create Lasting Change Instantly. He has studied mindset and behavior change over the past 10 years and has finally cracked the code on the fastest way to make habits happen. Tyson has a masters in Human Resources and an MBA. He is a certified life coach and specializes in time management, identity-based habit creation, and teaching people the skill of neuro-bypassing. Tyson has served as an elders quorum president, stake executive secretary, and currently serves as a ministering secretary. He is happily married and the proud father of two redheaded girls and one brown-headed boy. Highlights 02:00 Introduction to Tyson Bradley and his work as a neuro bypassing coach. 04:40 Tyson talks about what he sees most with the people that he coaches and what a lot of people are struggling with. 10:15 Tyson’s manuscript that he uses in coaching. It’s not for sale but part of a membership he has for those he coaches. 13:20 We need to start focusing more on identity. 14:40 Inherent Identity method. Also called the I AM ME method. They use Kurt’s calling as an example of how to apply this method. 15:00 I is for Ideal. What is the ideal version of this experience? It could be a goal or a church calling that you really want to improve on. 19:40 A is for Amplify. Take your ideal and amplify it. A lot of times we think small but this helps us to think big. 27:00 M is for movement. What is the next step I need to take? 33:45 M is for Manifesto. Take the action and create it into an identity statement. Identity statements always start with I am… An I am statement needs to be paired with doing something. 40:50 E is for Evoke. Evoke is like to remember. Remember our identity. 49:30 Tyson guides us through the I am me method. Ideal – What would you love to experience? What’s your ideal? Amplify – What would be the 10x or dramatized version of your ideal? Visualize it. Take time to be grateful for it. Movement – what is my next step? What is the one thing I need to do next? Manifesto – creating your action step and turning it into an identity. Evoke – Wake up in the morning and remind yourself of who you are and your true identity everyday. 53:30 Tyson encourages people to change the way they pray. One way that Tyson likes to change his prayers is by writing his prayers down. Kurt writes down 3 gratitudes and 3 glories to God that helps his prayers be more meaningful. 57:50 Tyson shares his testimony and final thoughts on leadership and Jesus Christ. Links InherentIdentity.com TRANSCRIPT coming soon Listen on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library

Vivian Bishop-Cook lives in the Green Bay, Wisconsin area and works as a therapist. She has been a participant and leader at Young Women camps at least 15 times as an adult. Highlights 02:30 Introduction to Vivian and her background. 04:45 Vivian talks about what she is seeing in her therapist’s office. Most people are working on relationship issues, balancing their lives, and working on their self esteem. 07:15 Vivian’s girls camp experience growing up and also as a leader. As an adult she has been to girls camp 15-16 times. 11:50 Vivian focuses on 3 things for girls camp. She calls it the three ring circus. Faith Friendship Fun 14:50 One of the most important parts of camp is mentoring the YCLs and letting them lead. In Vivian’s stake they also call a YCL director. The YCLs are the heart of the camp. 20:40 How Vivian’s stake mentors the youth. Mentoring is the secret sauce. Youth do the devotionals. They pick the topic but Vivian mentors them on how to do the devotional and how to present the topic. 24:50 The number one request from the young women was to have a longer personal spiritual time during camp. 25:20 Vivian shares a story of one of her young women and her experience with personal spiritual time during camp. 26:40 Mentoring the youth to do devotionals is more than just mentoring. It’s an opportunity for the leaders and the youth to connect and get to know each other more. It’s a moment of one on one time to help them with their testimonies and struggles in their lives. 29:00 Part of having the YCLs doing the devotionals is to help them tap into their vulnerability and sharing a part of themselves. 29:45 In preparation for camp they teach the girls what a testimony is and what the components are. This helps the testimony meetings be focused on the gospel and so that the testimony meeting doesn’t turn into a group therapy session. 30:50 The ring of friendship is another important principle at camp. They created “companions” so that everyone has a friend at camp. 35:00 Vivian’s stake has been working on including the YCLs more. They invite them to do the workshops with them. It’s not always easier to have the youth lead but it’s very important to their growth. 39:00 Vivian spent about 8 years outside the Church in her early 20s, where she explored other faiths. But everything led her back to the Church. 42:40 Final thoughts and testimony of leadership and growing closer to Christ. Links TRANSCRIPT coming soon Listen on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library

Sara Brewer is a certified life and faith-based coach, and a Latter-day Saint. She has helped hundreds of people quit porn through her coaching programs and helped thousands of people through her highly-rated podcast, Overcome Pornography for Good. In this podcast, Sara shares a presentation that is now part of the Liberating Saints Virtual Conference. Links Watch the entire Liberating Saints Virtual Summit with a Zion Lab membership SaraBrewer.com is now The Center for Overcoming Pornography It Isn’t a Sin to Be Weak, by Wendy Ulrich Worthiness is not Flawlessness, by Brad Wilcox Helpful episodes from Sara’s podcast that focus on the stop, drop, and breathe technique: Episodes 66, 47, 21 Read the transcript of this presentation Highlights 02:50 Introduction to Sara Brewer, a life coach for people that struggle with pornography use. 05:15 Sara helps both men and women with pornography. 06:15 Sara introduces her presentation and the main root causes. 07:20 The first root of pornography use is ESCAPE AND BUFFERING. Buffering is an action to escape negative emotion. People try to put on a “bandaid” solution on porn. They don’t deal with their emotions. People need to learn to sit with their emotions and focus on healing wounds. 14:00 Shame only makes porn use worse. A lot of members get into a shame cycle with porn use and it never ends. 16:10 The difference between guilt and shame. Holding onto guilt turns into shame. 17:00 It’s not either shame or justification. There are middle ground emotions that are going to be more useful in helping people quit. 18:00 It’s important to differentiate physiology and morality. We all have urges and sexual desires. This is physiology and part of being human. Morality comes from what we do with our desires. 20:10 Application for leaders. Be careful with punishment and adding to shame. 21:10 Leaders need to stop focusing on behavior but underlying emotions. 22:00 Using a filter is a good tool to use but it’s not a long-term solution for porn use and addiction. 25:30 Guilt should not be a motivator. It’s more of a signal that something doesn’t align with our values. 26:40 Root two is OVER DESIRE. Over desire is something that is learned and can be unlearned. It’s your brain and reward system working correctly. Avoiding urges isn’t going to solve the porn problem. Pavlov’s dog theory and what it teaches us about learning and unlearning behaviors. 32:00 Willpower doesn’t work. It’s like holding a beach ball under water. It wants to pop up. Allow the urges and emotions to pass through without getting the reward. 35:20 Sara’s technique to help people overcome over desire for porn. Stop, drop, and breathe. 38:20 Applications for leaders Stop telling people they will struggle with this forever. Avoid all or nothing thinking. Slip ups don’t mean you have to start over. Stop demonizing sexuality. It’s very normal to want sex and to have urges. Avoid saying that more prayer, fasting, and righteousness will fix this. Instead, focus on healing. 40:10 Instead of distracting yourself, sit with the emotions. 44:40 Too often we hear a lot of all or nothing phrases in the bishop’s office. If you can go x amount of days without porn then you can take the sacrament. 46:00 Root three is IDENTITY. 47:10 How we think about ourselves really matters. It gives us energy for our actions. 48:20 Not everyone that uses porn has an addiction. Most young men and women are not addicted. Be careful about labeling people with an addiction. It can be harmful to them. 50:00 Applications for leaders Avoid fostering an addiction mindset which is an I can’t change mindset. Avoid labeling people with an addiction. Avoid members feeling hopeless and stuck. Help members foster an identity of someone that quits porn. 55:20 Bishops should consider sending people to a life coach. They shouldn’t dismiss life coaches. They can work side by side with therapists. 59:20 Sara has many resources for members. She offers programs with group calls or one-on-one appointments. 1:01:00 Sara’s final encouragement to leaders who are trying to help those that are struggling with pornography The Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints’ mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, Kirby Heyborne, and many more in over 700 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Elder Lynn Grant Robbins was sustained as a General Authority Seventy in 1997. After serving for over 25 years, he was released and given emeritus status on October 2, 2022. Elder Robbins served as a member of the Presidency of the Seventy, as President of the North America Southwest Area, and supervised the North America Southeast and Southwest Areas. He has served as President of the South America South, Central America, and North America West Areas. He has also served in the North America Central Area. In his professional career, Elder Robbins was one of the founders of Franklin Quest. He concluded his career there when he was called to preside over the Uruguay Montevideo Mission. Born in Springville, Utah, he married Jan Nielson and they are the parents of seven children and 21 grandchildren. Highlights 02:10 Introduction to Lynn G Robbins; his background in the Church, education, and work 11:30 Lynn talks about his journey in church leadership. 17:40 The early years of leadership as a bishop and mission president 20:00 Transitioning to becoming a new mission president; relying on revelation instead of past experience 21:30 Every Christ-like attribute has a complementary attribute. We can make all the plans but those plans have to be balanced with following the Spirit. 23:00 Elder Robbins explains complementary principles. They complement one another. It’s not justice versus mercy. It’s justice and mercy. Religion and science Men and women 24:15 The contrary principle. Elder Robbins explains the firefly effect. It takes a dark background to manifest the light of the firefly. We need contrary principles and opposites to manifest the truth. 26:30 Any virtue taken to the extreme becomes discombobulated. For example, love taken to the extreme becomes enabling and permissive. 27:00 A complimentary principle that goes with love is self reliance. Elder Robbins gives the example of Helen Keller. 29:00 Bishops need to use these complementary principles of justice and mercy or love and self reliance. When giving welfare help it’s important to make sure that there is self reliance there. 31:50 Bishops also have to balance administration and ministering. It’s easy to write someone a check to help them out. Problem solved. It’s much more difficult to sit down with that person and go through all their expenses but this is ministering. 33:10 You can give a man a fish and feed him for a day. That’s charity. However, it’s far wiser to teach him to fish. This is self reliance and he will be fed for a lifetime. 36:30 Too many people leave the bishop’s office feeling condemned. Always lean to the side of mercy. They should leave the bishop’s office feeling the love of the Savior demonstrated through the bishop and the hope of the Atonement. 39:40 Elder Robbins gives advice on how to help people with repentance. Remember that every case is different. Some sins need more mercy and others need justice and sacrifice. It’s not about punishment. 45:00 The bishop’s office is like a garbage dump. It’s a place where people can unload their garbage and walk away feeling lighter. 49:50 The most important things happening in a stake are never going to show up on a sheet of statistics because they can’t be seen. You can’t count love between husband and wife, conversion, and acts of service. 50:30 The Savior counted the things that cannot be seen or counted as the “weightier matters.” Statistics are things that matter less. Elder Robbins describes the difference between do’s and be’s. 51:30 Elder Robbins talks about how he has helped stake presidencies during stake conference weekend and what they focused on. 54:40 Elder Robbins gives an example of the do’s and be’s and why they are both important. 57:00 The world looks for accolades and titles. The Lord looks for the weak and the simple. Christ’s disciples were fishermen. It’s the Lord that qualifies his servants. 1:02:30 Some people are afraid of extending invites. Why are we afraid of extending invites? 1:05:00 A good question for a leader to ask while doing home visits is, “Would you be willing to share your experience in the Church?” 1:06:00 A totally ineffective question that all of us do at the end of a visit is, “is there anything that we can help you with?” Let’s change that to something more effective. A better question is, “If it’s not too personal, what are the things that keep you awake at night?” Pray with them and for them about these things. 1:07:10 Elder Robbins breaks down the quote from Elder Packer, “True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behaviors.” Behavior is evidence of what’s in their heart. You have to figure out what is driving someone’s behavior. 1:09:00 Elder Robbins shares an experience of teaching his daughter to make her own decisions and letting her be self reliant. Forcing our children into a decision can plant the seed of rebellion. 1:14:00 President Nelson’s story of teaching his daughter. He took a minute to teach her and then let her make her decision to keep the Sabbath day holy or not. 1:15:45 Balance of love and expectations 1:21:30 How do you have high love for people? What can you do on a day to day basis? 1:24:30 Christ’s greatest sermon was His life. The quest of our lifetime is to develop Christlike attributes. Be like Him. 1:27:40 If you were to ask the world to consider the words, leader and servant and if they are antonyms or synonyms, they would say antonyms. However, if you asked Christ, he would say they are synonyms. 1:29:20 Elder Robbins’ final thoughts and sharing how leading has drawn him to Christ and vice versa Links Until Seventy Times Seven TRANSCRIPT coming soon Listen on YouTube Scriptures referenced in this podcast: Luke 9, Alma 31:5, Exodus 31:13 Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Quotes referenced in this podcast: “By proving contraries, truth is made manifest.”—Brigham Young

Marlisa Ahuna, Germaine Tauati, and LaRae Mortensen of the Hilo, Hawaii Stake, joined Kurt for an online conversation about their unique Huaka’i youth trek over spring break 2022. Marlise is currently the stake interfaith specialist in the Hilo, Hawaiʻi Stake. She has previously served as stake communications director, Primary president and music leader, and Relief Society counselor and president. Marlise grew up in Bakersfield, California, served a mission in Fukuoka, Japan, and graduated from Brigham Young University with a BA in International Studies and Diplomacy, and from the University of South Dakota with an MM in Vocal Performance. She is the owner of Marlise Ahuna Music Studio, married to Joseph for 20 years, and they are the parents of four children. LaRae Mortensen is currently the stake Primary music leader in the Hilo, Hawai’i Stake. She has previously served as the stake Young Women president, ward Primary president, music leader, counselor, secretary, and pianist, as well as ward Young Women president and counselor. LaRae grew up in Punalu’u, on the island of Oahu in Hawai’i, and graduated from Brigham Young University–Hawaii with a BS in Business Management. She and her husband Hans own H&L Services LLC, a landscape maintenance company, and have been married for 27 years. They have five children and seven grandchildren. Highlights 02:30 Introduction to the speakers and the trek they did in Hawaii 05:00 The church is very established in Hawaii. The demographics there. 05:45 The tradition of treks and how it’s different in Hawaii 08:00 The trek experience in Hawaii and finding a good location. 09:00 Connecting the tradition of the trek to the culture of the people 11:30 The meaning of Huaka’i 13:30 A summary of the trek and what they did each day 16:20 There was a lot of preparation and activities before the trek. It created a richer experience. 17:30 The follow up experience to the trek. Many of the youth shared their experiences in sacrament meeting. 18:15 The Hawaii trek was adapted in a way that allowed the youth to connect with their ancestors and traditions. They didn’t do as much walking. 20:00 The dynamic of the adult leaders and what they did on the trek 24:30 The trek was almost like a glorified youth conference. They packed the days with activities. Because of Covid they didn’t do overnights. 26:00 The amount of adults involved and what it took to put the trek together 27:00 There were a lot of cultural activities taught by different members of the stake. 29:20 What the youth got out of the activities and what they went away saying about it 31:15 Sometimes we try too hard to orchestrate a spiritual moment. In reality just gathering together with a focus on Christ, tradition, and our ancestors we can walk away with a spiritual experience. 32:30 Things the leaders think they could change for the next trek More youth-led activities Involving the youth more in preparation and planning 33:40 A cultural based trek is an opportunity to show the youth how their culture aligns with the gospel. Many of the youth see culture and religion as two different things. It was important for leaders to show how they could integrate the two. 36:45 A cultural based trek helps the people inside and outside the culture to see each other better. The pioneers in Hawaii are just as important as the pioneers that crossed the plains There are many different cultures within Hawaii. All the youth were able to connect and learn more about Hawaiian culture to bridge the gap between them. 44:00 Kurt recaps the overall trek experience. 44:50 The dress on the trek and the importance of the clothing they chose to wear that was connected to their ancestors 52:00 Final thoughts. The trek was exactly what the youth in Hawaii needed. It wasn’t their event; it was the Lord’s event. Links Video of days 1-3 activities Hilo, Hawai’i Stake Facebook page TRANSCRIPT coming soon Watch on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library

Evan Hathaway owns the Time To Smile Dental practice in Eagle, Idaho, just outside of Boise, specializing in cosmetic and sedation dentistry. He particularly loves serving those needing reconstruction from fear-based dental neglect. Evan grew up in southeastern Idaho and attended Rick’s College and Brigham Young University. He earned his doctorate degree in Dental Surgery at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond, Virginia, and a general practice residency in Northern California prior to settling in the Boise area. Evan served a mission to Leeds, England, and has served in an elders quorum presidency, a bishopric, as a Young Men president, high counselor, YSA bishop, and high priest group leader. He is currently serving as the elders quorum instructor and as a senior service missionary for the Addiction Recovery Program. Evan loves art and creating, reading and learning with his wife of 39 years, Missy, and enjoys weight lifting to stay fit, but his greatest passion is his family and serving and ministering to those recovering from addictions. Evan and Missy have four children and 13 grandchildren. Highlights 02:00 Evan introduces himself and his story. 06:00 Evan’s mindset was, it’s up to me and all I have to do is work hard to overcome this. He wasn’t surrendering to God. 07:20 Addiction started for Evan when he got addicted to painkillers after shoulder surgery. He had a lot of other addictions in his life that he wasn’t even aware of. 09:30 Evan talks about his early addiction to pornography and other things he did to cope. Extreme exercise was one of the ways of trying to stay away from pornography. 12:30 Evan goes more into his addiction of painkillers and his state of denial. 14:00 Overcoming addiction is not about having more willpower. It’s about humility and getting help from God. 15:40 Evan describes the nuclear bomb that went off in his life. He got caught in his addiction, went to a 90-day rehab, almost got his license taken away, and was faced with possible jail time. 20:45 Going to the rehab center and overcoming shame and fear 24:10 “I had to be force-fed vulnerability.” Evan was forced to be humble and truly learn to be honest and vulnerable. 25:45 Evan’s advice to leaders when it comes to letting people share their stories Don’t add to shame culture because you feel uncomfortable talking about certain topics Shame culture shackles healing 31:15 What can leaders do to help with addictions? As leaders we need to be the catalyst of de-shaming. 34:00 Evan illustrates the difference between having a perfectionist attitude and hiding your sins vs being honest, open, and vulnerable. 36:00 As a Bishop are you sending a shame message or a redemption message? 36:15 In today’s world we can’t teach obedience more than we teach redemption and healing. 37:00 Invite someone like Evan to your fifth Sunday to share their story of redemption. 39:00 Let’s stop categorizing sin. All sin keeps us from God. 42:00 Telling stories. We can connect to stories and we can feel the Spirit through honest stories. 44:20 Create a space where it’s ok to admit to the things we’ve done wrong. 47:00 Evan talks about the things that his wife has had to do in order to support Evan and take care of her own mental health. She went through a program called Al-Anon. 48:40 Evan is dedicated to going to 12-step meetings for the rest of his life. This helps him not relapse and keeps him engaged. 52:00 Step twelve is to share the message. Keep helping others. 52:40 What Evan’s recovery looks like today and where he’s at in his dentistry career. 54:30 Recovery as a family. Reconnecting with his wife through recovery and regaining emotional intimacy. 1:01:10 Evan’s wife’s journey to healing and dealing with betrayal trauma. 1:04:45 Evan’s final thoughts to church leaders trying to help people with addiction Links Al-Anon Addiction Recovery Program Read the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast

This is a rebroadcast. The episode originally ran in January 2020. Melody Warnick is the author of two books about thriving where you live: This Is Where You Belong: Finding Home Wherever You Are and If You Could Live Anywhere: The Surprising Power of Place in a Work-from-Anywhere World. Her books have been featured in the New York Times, Time magazine, Fast Company, Psychology Today, and others, and her writing has appeared in such publications as the Washington Post, the New York Times, Slate, Reader’s Digest, The Guardian, Good Housekeeping, and Woman’s Day. A regular speaker about creating connection with your community, Melody lives in Blacksburg, Virginia, where her husband serves as stake president. Highlights 5:30 Serving in Melody’s stake in Virginia 8:20 How the book came about 10:50 Experiments in loving where you live: micro-action steps you can intentionally take to create positive experiences for yourself 18:45 Applying these principles to wards and stakes 19:20 Creating a community based on geography creates a situation where we can practice being more Christlike 21:50 Benefits of “instant community” in the ward, as compared to moving for people not in the Church tribe: familiarity and similarity 25:45 When you struggle fitting into the community 26:25 Leaders need to pay attention to these people 27:30 The more engaged you are, the more you will feel at home 28:30 Everyone can feel left out or like they don’t fit in 30:10 Being proactive can have a big impact 34:00 Serving in callings and outside of callings: have a personal ministry from a desire to be of service 37:35 Taking your talent to the community 41:30 Do we have to participate in the Church community? 43:30 It can be easier to socialize with Church members 46:10 Serving in a Church community within the larger community 50:55 Being the mayor of your street: building social cohesion in your neighborhood 54:40 Cliques and community: creating horseshoes, not circles 59:00 Detaching from your ward and going forward: moving or changing callings 1:07:00 Choosing to live near family… or not 1:13:00 Finding joy wherever you live 1:15:00 Two-hour church and missing connections: You don’t have to ask permission to create community 1:17:45 Asking, “Where are we needed?” 1:20:00 Building relationships with people and finding ways to serve them is key to living a Christlike life Links melodywarnick.com This is Where You Belong: Finding Home Wherever You Are If You Could Live Anywhere: The Surprising Importance of Place in a Work-from-Anywhere World TRANSCRIPT coming soon Listen on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library

Kelly Thompson Clark is a recovering drug addict and alcoholic who spent three decades battling the disease of addiction. Plagued by the effects of mental illness and addiction, she eventually descended into homelessness and prostitution. In 2016, after finding faith in Jesus Christ and entering twelve-step recovery, Kelly’s life of tragedy and despair transformed into one that overflowed with purpose and hope. Kelly is a published author, public speaker, podcast co-host, and social media influencer. She has dedicated her life to sharing the reality of hope with those who continue to suffer from the devastating impact of addiction. Heather Granata Warren and her husband are the parents of nine kids, her two nieces, a daughter-in law, and two dogs. They reside in the Lehi, Utah area, and she owns Little Adventures, a company that manufactures clothing-quality princess dress ups. Her full-time job, however, is as a wife and an Uber driver (for the kids), and handling the emotional, physical and spiritual needs of all those young people. She is a graduate of Brigham Young University with a bachelors degree in Physical Education. Heather currently serves as a Young Women 13–15-year-old advisor. Her favorite callings—and most of the last twenty years—have involved serving the youth and in the Young Women organization. Links Between Monsters and Mercy: An Inspiring True Story of a Soul Lost and Found Helping Addicts Share Their Story | An Interview with Jessica Butterfield & Kelly Thompson Lamar’s story Addiction Recovery Program Read the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights 02:00 Kurt introduces Kelly and Heather. 04:00 Introduction to Kelly’s story of addiction and redemption 07:00 Kelly shares their family background and how they were raised. 09:20 As a very young child Kelly suffered from anxiety disorder and depression. She had very troubled teenage years and got into drug addiction and harmful behaviors. 16:00 Kelly looks back on her journey and shares what her young self needed at that time. The true solution was always God and the atonement of Jesus Christ. 17:40 The journey was important. Kelly had small glimpses of the spirit and Jesus Christ throughout the years. In the end, all those experiences combined to help her finally surrender to God. 21:00 The family dynamic and how they were dealing with Kelly’s problems 25:45 Coping with different substances, food, or work. Putting these behaviors before God and losing all peace of mind. 26:30 Hitting her absolute rock bottom using meth and heroin, losing her two daughters, and living out on the streets of Salt Lake 27:40 Heather shares her experience watching her sister suffer and go out of control, not being able to help her. 29:20 Addressing codependency. How can families not enable the member of the family with the addiction? What can they do to truly help? 32:30 The Atonement isn’t just for sin. Heather shares her grief and unbearable pain of thinking she was going to lose her sister. She had to surrender her sister to God. 35:20 Bishop’s should teach surrender to God. Everything always goes back to the Atonement. Let God carry you. 36:10 Kelly describes her gethsemane and how she slowly learned to turn to God and surrender unconditionally to God. 44:45 Kelly describes her emotional journey and miracles that happened to get sober and come back to Christ. 50:30 The process of getting off of heroin and meth 58:30 It’s not just about getting clean and sober but it’s about feeling joy again and coming back to Christ. Not all people that get off drugs are happy. 59:50 Advice for a ward or Relief Society that is trying to help someone in the midst of addiction and chaos. Love them where they are at with no expectations. 1:01:30 The more vulnerable and honest Kelly is, the more people connect with her. The less judgmental they are. 1:04:00 The Atonement of Jesus Christ lifts the shame. 1:07:20 Rings of light sometimes have frayed ends. However, in time everything will come full circle. Healing is individual and will happen in different time frames for everyone. 1:08:30 Kelly shares where she is now. 1:11:20 Heather’s relationship with Kelly now 1:15:00 Heather’s final encouragement to those that are family members that are discouraged and going through a dark moment with their loved one 1:16:15 Kelly’s final encouragement and advice. Remember that the pain is never wasted. Sometimes we have to go through the darkness to find Christ. The Leading Saints Podcast has ranked in the top 20 Christianity podcasts in iTunes, gets over 500,000 listens each month, and has over 10 million total downloads as part of nonprofit Leading Saints’ mission to help latter-day saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, J. Devn Cornish, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, DeAnna Murphy, Michael Goodman, Richard Ostler, Ganel-Lyn Condie, and many more in over 500 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Pavel Mykhailovskii was born and raised in Ukraine, and served a mission in Dnipro, Ukraine. He was called as the second counselor in the mission presidency in Dnipro only eight months after serving his mission. He has also served as branch president and is currently serving as stake president. Highlights 02:35 Introduction to Pavel and his background 04:00 The current state of Ukraine due to the war. Pavel lives in one of the biggest cities in eastern Ukraine where, for the most part, life is normal. 07:30 Pavel is a 29-year-old stake president. He shares his background in the Church. 15:15 What Pavel learned as a counselor in the mission presidency 18:15 Pavel describes his experience as a branch president in Ukraine and what his ward dynamic was like. 19:30 The effect that the war has had on wards and branches 23:30 Pavel describes how his stake was created. It was a miracle that it was able to be created during the pandemic. 26:30 Getting called as the stake president 31:30 Being stake president during the Russian invasion 37:00 Miracles that happened during the war 52:20 You can’t freeze revelation. You have to act on it immediately. 57:20 How we can help the people of Ukraine 1:00:00 Pavel shares his final thoughts on serving and becoming a disciple of Christ. Links Listen to the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast Watch on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library The Leading Saints Podcast has ranked in the top 20 Christianity podcasts in iTunes, gets over 500,000 listens each month, and has over 10 million total downloads as part of nonprofit Leading Saints’ mission to help latter-day saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, J. Devn Cornish, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, DeAnna Murphy, Michael Goodman, Richard Ostler, Ganel-Lyn Condie, and many more in over 500 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.