At Peace Parents Podcast

Paradigm Shift Program alumna Rachel shares her story in this episode, which includes insight she gained enduring serious sickness as a young adult. She brings this perspective to the hardest moments and eras parenting her PDA children, and explains the difference that can make, even while being incredibly difficult.

A mother shares her experiences raising a child with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), detailing the unique challenges she faced. She reflects on the emotional toll of parenting during the pandemic and emphasizes the importance of empathy and understanding. The conversation delves into the transformative power of acceptance in both education and personal growth. Insightful anecdotes underscore the need for nurturing environments and adaptive strategies to support neurodiverse children. Self-acceptance emerges as a key theme in fostering strong parent-child relationships.

I think PDA is its own neurotype, different from non-PDA Autism and ADHD. That doesn't mean PDA kids, teens and adults can't also be Autistic or ADHD - many are, including at least one of my sons. But it means there's a different logic for how we support PDA children and teens - even if they are also Autistic or ADHD - based on the unique way their brain and nervous system works.

You're not doing it wrong! And I know this because there is not one right or wrong to parent a PDA child. Parents I work with make tons of different decisions - and change those decisions over time - depending on the unique circumstances, opportunities, values and constraints they face. And I love that!

Karin is a Dutch medical teacher and an alumna of our Paradigm Shift Program with three children with three different neurotypes. I loved reconnecting with her and hearing how she and her neurodivergent husband use three different parenting approaches in order to successfully support their kids. I hope you find her insights helpful, too!

Many of you know that my PDA son stopped eating most foods when he was in burnout. But I've also worked with countless parents whose PDA child or teen can't stop eating. And so I've dedicated this episode to the topic - how to understand compulsive eating as part of PDA, and an approach that may be helpful. xo,Casey

Chris Wenger, known as Speech Dude, is a neurodivergent speech-language pathologist and creator of a dynamic assessment tool for autistic students. He discusses practical strategies for accommodating teens with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) in schools. Key topics include writing effective IEP goals, fostering autonomy for success, and using intrinsic motivation instead of traditional rewards. Chris emphasizes creating nurturing environments and adapting communication styles to empower both parents and students navigating the challenges of PDA.

Dr. Mel Houser, MD, shares stories from her childhood, career as a doctor, and work reimagining healthcare and community at All Brains Belong in Vermont. PDA Autistic herself, I hope you'll find her insights as interesting, helpful and hopeful as I did.

Explore the nuances of connecting with PDA children and teens, focusing on how to enhance communication through nervous-system cues. Learn why traditional verbal exchanges often fail and the importance of non-verbal signals like facial expressions and body language. Discover techniques such as lowering your physical stance to reduce perceived authority and using declarative language to foster engagement. Embrace patience and allow for processing time, while also recognizing and respecting your child's autonomy in communication. These insights aim to strengthen the parent-child bond.

Five years ago, when my son barely ate anything, and I feared he would end up with a feeding tube, and none of the traditional therapies worked, these are the 20 things I wish someone would have said to me, because I was freaking out! I hope they are as helpful to you now as I know they would have been for me back then.