Disordered: Anxiety Help

Want to talk about what you hear on this episode? Join us in the Disordered community space:https://disordered.fm/community---In this episode, Josh and Drew tackle a common hurdle in anxiety recovery: what happens when an exposure feels like a "failure" or when you choose to "bail."An exposure is the deliberate act of evoking an anxious response. It is a way to rewire the brain by intentionally lighting up the threat response and practicing response prevention. The goal is to teach your brain that you are safe even when you feel scared, rather than trying to force yourself to feel calm.Many people believe that feeling high levels of anxiety during an exposure means they have failed. This is a misconception. The exposure is designed to make you feel anxious; therefore, feeling those symptoms is exactly what is supposed to happen."Failure" is often a label generated by your Inner Critic based on perfectionist expectations. True growth comes from being willing to experience the discomfort, even if the execution feels "messy".Bailing occurs when the discomfort becomes overwhelming and you choose to retreat. While this can feel like a setback, it is often a signal that you need more self-compassion. We discuss the "punch in the face" moment. That's the the point where the plan goes out the window because the physical sensations or intrusive thoughts become intense.The "Bad Day Playbook": Don't try to make it up on the fly when you're panicked. Have a pre-planned set of actions to take if an exposure doesn't go as intended.Avoid "White-Knuckling": Simply "pushing through" while counting down the seconds to escape is not the same as a willing exposure.The Goal is Willingness: Recovery is about changing your relationship with the anxiety, not eliminating the feeling. Even an "unplanned" exposure—like a sudden intrusive thought or a physical symptom—is an opportunity to practice these principles.Go Through the Peak: If possible, try not to leave the situation at the height of your distress. Leaving on the "back end" of the peak, on your own terms, provides the best learning opportunity for your brain.We also share "Did It Anyway" stories from the community, including a powerful example of navigating health anxiety during a family party.---Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.-----Got a question or did it anyway to share? Send us an email or voicemail on our website.

Want to talk about what you're hearing today with Josh, Drew, and others that are sharing your experience? Check out the Disordered Community Space:https://disordered.fm/community---This episode of Disordered addresses the experience of constant, simmering anxiety that fluctuates in intensity throughout the day without fully disappearing. We refer to this as undulating panic or a loop of peaking anxiety.The Nature of Rolling Anxiety: Many people that they are different because they don't have anxiety that appears, then disappears. It rolls and undulates throughout the day. This is the rule, not the exception. We explain how an internal fixation on bodily sensations and thoughts creates a cycle where anxiety rises and falls continually.The Monitoring Trap: Using scales like Subjective Units of Distress (SUDs) can become a compulsion. When you constantly scan your body to check if you are a "four" or a "nine," you maintain the rolling, undulating sensitized state you are trying to escape.The Sand Timer Analogy: Physiological and mental arousal (yes, even a full panic attack) has a beginning, middle, and end. Once the "sand timer" of an adrenaline spike is flipped, it must run its course. Attempting to "shake the timer" through frantic coping mechanisms only slows down the natural process of settling.Recovery Through Action: We share listener stories of "doing it anyway" despite monophobia and physical pain. These examples illustrate how recovery involves moving forward while discomfort is present rather than waiting for it to stop.Recovery is grounded in the principle of psychological flexibility. The goal is to learn to be with difficult internal experiences like fear and physical sensations rather than trying to control or prevent them. By treating these fluctuations as a background noise rather than a defining event, you teach your brain that the state is not a signal of danger.---The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.---Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.-----Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.

Want to discuss what you hear on this episode with Josh and Drew and others that are sharing your experience? Check out the Disordered Podcast Community Space.https://disordered.fm/communty----In this episode of Disordered, we celebrate the "Global Edition" of Did It Anyway. We're sharing inspiring stories from our community members around the world who chose to face their fears and take action despite experiencing intense anxiety.From navigating health anxiety at a drum and bass gig in London to managing emetophobia while being physically ill, these stories highlight the power of psychological flexibility. We discuss how recovery isn't about the absence of anxiety, but rather the shortening of the time between "oh my god" and "oh well".The "Did It Anyway" Mindset: How listeners applied this approach to return to work, travel, and social situations despite panic and agoraphobia.Desensitization in Real-Time: Using exposure therapy principles to stay present with uncomfortable physical sensations rather than retreating.Challenging Safety Behaviors: Stories of individuals staying home alone for the first time in weeks or eating "fear foods" to reclaim their lives.Overcoming the Inner Critic: Learning to move into productive problem-solving mode instead of self-berating when anxiety spikes and thinking isn't perfectly clear.Recovery as a Journey: Emphasizing that while these principles are simple, implementing them is a gradual process that requires patience and persistence.We also touch on the importance of self-compassion and acknowledging that even when life is genuinely difficult—such as dealing with family health struggles—you can still apply these principles to your recovery and desensitization work.---The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.---Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.-----Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.

They explain the "Stress Jug" metaphor to show why anxiety and panic can seem to come from nowhere. Topics include how positive and negative stress accumulate, why the brain invents threat stories, and the harm of being stressed about stress. Listeners share brave 'did it anyway' wins like solo driving and travel. Recovery ideas focus on tolerating overflow and uncovering long-held emotional 'gunk'.

Questions about this episode? Want to interact with Drew, Josh, and other members of the Disordered audience? Check out the Disordered Community Space!⁠https://disordered.fm/community⁠-------This week we're discussing the relationship between anxiety and self-compassion. Self-compassion is often dismissed as a way to avoid difficult tasks or "whine" about struggles, but it is actually a functional part of the desensitization process.Drew shares how he originally viewed self-compassion as a weakness that would lead to more avoidance, only to realize that berating himself was not actually an effective motivator. Josh explains how a lack of self-compassion can lead to "re-sensitization" when you turn recovery into a performance you have to perfect.What We Discuss:The "No Self-Compassion" Mistake: Why driving yourself with brute force and criticism often backfiresAccepting The Current Version of You: The importance of acknowledging that you are currently afraid or avoidant without berating or rejecting yourself for it.Self-Compassion vs. Coddling: Distinguishing between being kind to yourself while doing hard things and using "kindness" as an excuse to stay on the sofa.Navigating Misunderstanding: How to handle friends or family who do not understand anxiety disorders and the importance of validating your own experience instead of waiting for them to do it.Recovery requires the flexibility to be afraid and move forward simultaneously. Using self-compassion means letting the scared version of yourself into the experiential classroom so you can actually learn the lessons found in acceptance, tolerance, surrender, floating, and exposure!---The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.---Want a way to ask questions about this episode or interact with other Disordered listeners?  The Disordered app is nearing release! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Visit our home page and get on our mailing list for more information..-----Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.

Discussion of how attention shapes anxiety and recovery. Stories about tolerating adrenaline by choosing where to focus. Why internal checking and calming tricks can keep fear alive. Practical attention-training examples like grounding, walks, and holding fear then shifting focus. Metaphors and listener wins showing practice builds confidence in moving attention.

After many months of building and planning, the Disordered Community space is now live. We could not be more pleased about this!Check out the community space here:https://disordered.fm/communityWhy did we do this?Endless scroll, algorithm-driven, attention focused platforms that only want to monetize your struggle are awful places to support anxious people.A smaller, more focused, intentional community where we can interact in a meaningful way and foster education, inspiration, and encouragement is actually useful in the real world.There are way too many anxiety "communities" that make egregious promises to fix you, cure you, lead you to freedom, and make you better - often at a very high cost. That's not how to do that. We're personally tired of dancing for Meta and Google. It's a huge amount of work to reach a small number of people (even with lots of followers) on platforms that don't really value the topic and the discussions we're having.We built this space to foster interaction, sharing, cheerleading, and encouragement. We've jammed it full of articles, tips, ideas, podcast episodes, and all the psychoeducational workshops we've produced over the years. All included in the community.You do NOT have to join the community to get better. This is absolutely optional and we're not going to hide things behind the paywall. Our content will continue to be out here on the Internet at large. But we do think we've made something useful and reasonable and that's where we're gonna be hanging out.

Clear rules for anxiety desensitization are explained in plain terms. Do the life tasks you would if you were calm, even while anxious. Let anxiety be present but not the main decision maker. Stories of real people facing public speaking, travel, and parenting struggles illustrate the approach. Practical examples show how quick, somatic exposures and values-driven choices move recovery forward.

In this episode of Disordered, guest co-host Kimberley Quinlan joins Drew to pull back the curtain on one of the most persistent hurdles in anxiety recovery: rumination. Whether you call it overthinking, worry, or mental "problem solving," the process is a universal constant across panic disorder, OCD, health anxiety, depression, and other related issues.We examine why rumination feels like a productive tool when it is actually a mental compulsion designed to avoid the discomfort of uncertainty. Kim and Drew break down the "tax" that rumination imposes on your life, specifically the deep physiological and emotional exhaustion that leaves you without the energy to make the actual changes you want.What You’ll Learn This Week:The Process vs. The Content: Why the specific thing you are worried about matters less than the fact that you are stuck in a circular thinking process.The "What If" Statement: How to recognize that "what if" is a statement of fear, not a question that requires an answer.Problem Solving vs. Rumination: Identifying the moment thinking stops being an investment and starts becoming a drain.Beliefs About Worry: Challenging the "positive" beliefs we hold, such as the idea that worrying makes us a better parent or more prepared for disaster.Attention Control Training: Practical ways to re-engage with the present moment, even when your brain is screaming for certainty.Recovery is about learning to put the thoughts down and returning to whatever is next in your day. It is hard work, and you might "suck at it" initially, but managing rumination is a skill for life that reduces suffering and brings you back to your own experiences.Find Kim's podcast here:https://www.youtube.com/@youranxietytoolkitKim's courses and workshops:https://cbtschool.comKim's Instagramhttps://instagram.com/YourAnxietyToolkit---The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.---Want a way to ask questions about this episode or interact with other Disordered listeners?  The Disordered app is nearing release! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Visit our home page and get on our mailing list for more information..---Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.

In this episode, Drew and Josh discuss the world of anxiety cures and the "miracle" solutions often marketed to those struggling with panic, OCD, and health anxiety. They share personal stories of the various methods they tried during their own recoveries and explain why many popular trends fail to provide long-term relief.The Magnetism of the Miracle Cure: Why we are drawn to supplements like magnesium or specialized "breathing devices" when we are desperate to feel better.Control vs. Acceptance: How many anxiety cures are actually just hidden control strategies that prevent true psychological flexibility.The Reality of "Natural" Supplements: A look at the laxative effects of magnesium and the empty promises of "science-based" miracle powders.The "Secret" Rituals: Why techniques like EFT tapping or specialized humming might feel helpful in the moment but often reinforce the idea that anxiety is a danger to be managed.The Risks of "Gurus" and Online Cults: How to identify predatory marketing and why a "lived experience" qualification does not replace professional, evidence-based training.The guys break down why the search for an external fix often leads to more discouragement. They discuss how true recovery is found in learning to tolerate and be with difficult internal experiences rather than trying to engineer them away with bracelets, essential oils, or "secret" techniques.If a solution is marketed as a "miracle" or "what nobody tells you," be cautious.Recovery is an internal process of building distress tolerance, not an external process of finding the right product.Support people are there to cheer you on through the fear, not to keep you "safe" from a feeling.About Disordered: Drew Linsalata and Joshua Fletcher are therapists and authors who have both recovered from severe anxiety disorders. They use evidence-based principles from ACT, CBT, and mindfulness to help you navigate your recovery journey without the empty promises of "magic" cures.---The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.---Want a way to ask questions about this episode or interact with other Disordered listeners?  The Disordered app is nearing release! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Visit our home page and get on our mailing list for more information..---Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.