The One You Feed | Personal Growth, Emotional Resilience & Purpose

Brent Williams suffered for a long time from depression and anxiety and during that time he kept a journal about his thoughts, feelings, and experiences. That journal has now been turned in to a beautiful graphic novel called, Out Of The Woods: A Journey Through Depression and Anxiety. In this episode, Brent and Eric use his story as a jumping-off point to discuss how depression can show up in your life and how you can realistically, practically, and effectively find your way out of it.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Brent Williams and I Discuss… His book, Out Of The Woods: A Journey Through Depression and Anxiety How subtle depression can be in your life – permeating everything  All the things he went to as a diagnosis before he admitted it was depression he was suffering from His resistance to taking depression medication How he watched his father take medication for anxiety and how it changed him His resistance to taking help from others His experience in therapy The metaphor of depression medication being a life preserver but you still have to swim back to shore The components of self-care: eat well, exercise, be with people, be outside, get support, stop ruminating, proper sleep How fundamental good nutrition is when it comes to mental well being Doing small and manageable things when you’re depressed How the reward mechanism in your brain isn’t working properly when you’re depressed How it took him a while to find the right therapist  The potential danger of meditating when depressed That mindfulness meditation was the form of meditating that helped him most The impact of keeping a mood chart – seeing a pattern that you can’t see at the time That sometimes you just have to push yourself over the hurdle of doing things that are good for you when you don’t feel like doing them Looking at your activities to assess your mental wellbeing Depression showing up as irritability in men Brent Williams Links:outofthewoods.co.nz **Special Offer** for The One You Feed listeners! Buy 1 Book, Get 1 Free to give to a friend, family member or a community center!FacebookTwitterPhlur – Eric created his own sampler set that you can try! Get this curated sampler set or create your own. Get 20% off your first 3 Phlur samples at Phlur.com/wolfFabFitFun – A women’s lifestyle subscription box filled with full-size premium items that you will love. Eric’s girlfriend is honestly obsessed because the items in this box are just so good. Give yourself this gift – use the promo code FEED for $10 off your first box at fabfitfun.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Sue Johnson is an author, clinical psychologist, researcher, and an internationally recognized leader in the field of couple interventions. She is founding Director of the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT) and Distinguished Research Professor at Alliant University in San Diego, California, as well as Professor Emeritus, Clinical Psychology, at the University of Ottawa, Canada. In this interview, Dr. Sue Johnson discuss her best selling book, “Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love” and her groundbreaking research of helping couples to enhance, repair, and keep their relationship.   Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Dr. Sue Johnson and I Discuss… Her book, Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love The wolf parable and how therapists act as the third wolf for couples. Relationships are often stuck in fear and anger Emotional disconnection causes distress in relationships. Humans are wired for close connection with others. Attachment needs continue into adulthood, most notably in romantic relationships. Common conversations in distressed relationships are known as “demon dialogues”. Relationships stuck in predictable patterns is referred to as the “Protest Polka”. “Freeze and Flee” means one person gives up on the relationship.  “Find the Bad Guy” in other words, "It’s not me, it’s you”  Understanding the circle of criticism, or the “dance” you’re stuck in. Learning to blame this “dance” rather than each other.   The “hold me tight conversation” that creates safety in the relationship. Understanding the negative cycle that causes disconnection. Creating a positive cycle by creating a secure bond “ARE” – Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement. Talking about fears rather than acting on them leads to bonding. Emotional connection in a relationship is a source of joy and strength. Dr. Sue Johnson Links: drsuejohnson.com Twitter Facebook TalkSpace – the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. Visit www.talkspace.com and enter Promo Code: WOLF to get 65% off your first month. DoorDash – Don’t worry about dinner, let dinner come to you with DoorDash. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code WOLF Westin – their reason for being is to help you travel well – eat well, move well and sleep well. Welcome to wellness. Explore at Westin.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gabe Howard is an award-winning writer, speaker, and host of the weekly Psych Central show who lives with bipolar and anxiety disorders. His new book, Mental Illness Is an A-Hole – And Other Observations, is what he and Eric discuss in this episode. You’ll be captivated by Gabe’s story as he tells it – it’s compelling, relatable, inspiring, and educational. Whether or not you have bipolar disorder or another mental illness, chances are you know someone or some people who do and so this is an important episode to listen to – you’ll deepen your understanding of what it means to live with mental illness. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Gabe Howard and I Discuss… His book, Mental Illness Is an A-Hole – And Other Observations What bipolar disorder is (and isn’t) and how it shows up in his life His compelling story The myth that people with mental illness come from bad families When he went to the ER because of suicidal thoughts How he defines recovery: spending more time living life than managing his bipolar disorder The 4 years he spent in a battle with his mental illness How you have to learn what works for you – and how that takes time The role of medication in the treatment of mental illness How it stings when your body lets you down Eric’s experience taking and not taking medication for his depression Whole health wellness Suicide Don’t choose a permanent solution to a temporary problem How suicide doesn’t end the pain – it transfers it to someone else Gabe Howard Links:gabehoward.comTwitterFacebookSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi Everyone!Here is a mini episode that was made for our Patreon members called A Teaching, a Song, and a Poem (and sometimes a bad joke!)Teaching: We Can Always Grow and ChangePoem: The Trees- Philip LarkinSong: Tomorrow- James If you'd like to get one of these every week, you can become a member of our community by going to oneyoufeed.net/joinBy supporting and joining The One You Feed Community, you'll get access to: A Teaching, a Song, and a Poem mini episodes Post Show Conversations Ad Free Episodes and more! Your support is greatly appreciated!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Lauren Zander is a life coach, university lecturer, public speaker and co-founder and chairwoman of The Handel Group. Her book, Maybe It's You: Cut the Crap. Face Your Fears. Love Your Life is what she and Eric discuss in this episode. Lauren has an incredibly useful approach to uncovering your limiting inner dialogue so that you can truly catapult yourself forward in life. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait - there's more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It's that simple and we'll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Lauren Zander and I Discuss... Her book, Maybe It's You: Cut the Crap. Face Your Fears. Love Your Life. Getting conscious of the unconscious parts of yourself Her life-changing moment at 19 How much of what is plaguing a person is in their inner dialogue The strategist in your head That over 80% of our thoughts are negative and repeating from the day before The chicken, the brat, the weather reporter Keeping promises to yourself Integrity and spirituality Consequences Accountability Lauren Zander Links:handelgroup.comTwitterFacebookFabFitFun: FabFitFun is a seasonal subscription box delivered 4 times a year with full-sized beauty, fashion, home, fitness, and wellness products for just $49.99 a box - though the box is valued at more than $200. Eric's girlfriend is honestly obsessed. You don't want to miss the upcoming fall box. Use the code FEED to get $10 off your first box www.fabfitfun.comWestin - their reason for being is to help you travel well - eat well, move well and sleep well. Welcome to wellness. Explore at Westin.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Father Richard Rohr is a globally recognized ecumenical teacher bearing witness to the universal awakening within Christian mysticism and the Perennial Tradition. He’s a Franciscan priest in the New Mexico Provence and the founder of the Center for Action and Contemplation in Albuquerque. In this episode, Eric and Father Richard discuss his most recent book, The Universal Christ: How a Forgotten Reality Can Change Everything We See, Hope For, and Believe.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Father Richard Rohr and I Discuss… His book, The Universal Christ: How a Forgotten Reality Can Change Everything We See, Hope For, and Believe What the word “Christ” means for him How God loves things by becoming them, by uniting with them That a mature Christian sees Christ in everything and everyone else The notion of God IN all things vs God IS all things How Christ is a stand-in for everything Focusing on the death of Christ and missing the life of Christ When God hides his face The difference between spiritual darkness and depression A loss of the feeling of faith in God isn’t the same thing as a loss of faith in God How distraction doesn’t make you happy God uses 3 things to draw us out of ourselves: goodness, truth and beauty Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful How God uses evil for your transformation That Jesus punishes nobody When you return in kind – like Michael and the dragon – you become the dragon The 2 virtues you need to move forward on the spiritual path: humility and honesty Father Richard Rohr Links:Center for Action and ContemplationTwitterFacebookWestin – their reason for being is to help you travel well – eat well, move well and sleep well. Welcome to wellness. Explore at Westin.comPhlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there. Visit www.phlur.com/wolf and use promo code WOLF to get 20% off first custom sampler setDoorDash – Don’t worry about dinner, let dinner come to you with DoorDash. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code WOLFIf you liked this episode with Father Richard Rohr, you might also enjoy listening to these earlier interviews:Richard Rohr – Part 1 (2017)Richard Rohr – Part 2 (2017)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Maia Szalavitz is an American reporter and author who has focused much of her work on the topic of addiction. She is the co-author of Born for Love and The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog, both with Dr. Bruce D. Perry. Her latest book is Unbroken Brain: A Revolutionary New Way of Understanding Addiction  In this paradigm-shifting interview, Maia Szalavitz explains that addiction is a learning disorder, a developmental disorder, which is a different way of thinking of addiction than it being a disease or a moral failing.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Maia Szalavitz and I Discuss… Her book,  Unbroken Brain: A Revolutionary New Way of Understanding Addiction That your brain becomes what it does – that the more you repeat an activity, the easier it becomes How addiction is a developmental disorder and how learning is critical to addiction The problems with discussion about addiction as a disease Arguing that addiction is a disease and then treating it like a moral failing Addiction resets your priorities and causes one to make different decisions Addiction = compulsive behavior that continues despite negative consequences How illogical it is then to try and address addiction by focusing on implementing additional negative consequences The complexity of addiction, genes + culture + timing The developmental history that gets you to addiction How the drug isn’t the problem and our efforts to get rid of it isn’t a helpful solution Addiction as a learning disorder that is characterized by a resistance to punishment The problem with “rock bottom” is it’s not helpful scientifically, and it implies a moral component of having to reach a point of extreme degradation before you can stop. What the motivation is that turns people to recovery How addicts keep using because they can’t see how they can survive any other way Recovery begins when you start to see that there are other options People with addiction are living at a point of learned helplessness The role of hope and other ways of managing their life Addiction as a coping mechanism The pleasures of the hunt vs the pleasures of the feast Wanting vs Liking Different motivational states Addiction as escalating wanting Stimulants and chasing that satisfaction The effectiveness and usefulness of 12 Step Programs The role of medicine in a developmental disorder Looking at addicts as students who need to learn better coping skills rather than sinners who need to be forced to repent. Maia Szalavitz Links:maiasz.comTwitter Calm app – Reduce your anxiety and stress and help you sleep better. Meditations for anxiety, adult bedtime stories, soothing music, calm masterclasses with many One You Feed Guests. Visit www.calm.com/wolf for 25% off a Calm Premium SubscriptionPeloton – Looking for a new way to get your cardio in? The Peloton bike will make you rethink the way you look at cycling classes!  Visit onepeloton.com and enter Promo code “WOLF” to get $100 off of accessories with purchase of a bike.  Westin – Westin resorts have wellness offerings that are curated just for you to help you eat, move and sleep well. Explore at westin.comIf you enjoyed this conversation with Maia Szalavitz, you might also enjoy these other episodes!Dr. Gabor Mate’Judson BrewerSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hal Gregersen is the Executive Director of the Leadership Center at MIT. He is a prolific author and motivational speaker recognized by Thinkers 500 as one of the World’s 50 Most Innovative Minds. In this episode, Eric and Hal discuss his book, Questions are the Answer: A Breakthrough Approach to Your Most Vexing Problems at Work and in Life. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Hal Gregersen and I Discuss… His book, Questions are the Answer: A Breakthrough Approach to Your Most Vexing Problems at Work and in Life That whether we know it or not, we’re all living questions Keystone questions Shadow questions How he discovered his questions The heart attack that changed his life His shadow questions Asking better questions Competing Commitments Underlying assumptions Alexander Papaderos How if you want better answers, you’ve got to ask better questions That if you feel stuck you’re probably asking the wrong question Brainstorming questions without answering them Why we don’t ask good questions Catalytic questions that challenge false assumptions How wanting to be right and smart stops us from getting to better questions What if you woke up and asked, what am I dead wrong about today? That if you’re not making big enough mistakes, you’re not trying hard enough The danger of moving into smaller and smaller tribes that are founded on being right Actively seeking passive data – observing and listening The power of the pause Listening to understand vs listening to defend How can I find and reflect the light in you? Hal Gregersen Links:halgregersen.comTwitterDaily Harvest – they deliver absolutely delicious organic, carefully sourced, chef-created fruit and veggie smoothies, soups, overnight oats, bowls and more to get 3 cups free in your first box. Visit www.dailyharvest.com and enter promo code: FEEDTalkSpace – the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. Visit www.talkspace.com and enter Promo Code: WOLF to get 65% off your first month.The Upper Room – a global ministry where you can join a worldwide community of Christian believers in daily prayer and devotional practice. Go to www.upperroom.org/welcome to get a free 30-day trialIf you enjoyed this conversation with Hal Gregersen, you might also enjoy these other episodes!John ZertaskySkip PrichardSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Eric Tivers is a licensed clinical social worker, coach, podcaster, speaker, consultant, and entrepreneur. He specializes in ADHD and has worked extensively with individuals on the autism spectrum. His podcast is ADHD reWired and in this episode, Eric and Eric talk about the experience of being an Adult with ADHD.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Eric Tivers and I Discuss… How he separates “mind” and “brain” ADHD in Adults Impulsivity and Hyperactivity Inattention and Distractability How people with ADHD aren’t lazy – according to brain scans The diagnostic criteria for ADHD The multimodal treatment approach for ADHD His experience with Adderall The lie of “I’ll remember that” Time wisdom The importance of Exercise, Sleep  Separate decision from action The wisdom in flipping a coin A disorder of self-regulation Accountability The anatomy of a to-do list Vision verbing Why cue Life on hard mode – but we can do hard things Eric Tivers Links:ADHDreWired.comTwitterFacebookYouTubeBlinkist – Do you have an ever-growing list of books to read? Blinkist can help! With thousands of non-fiction books distilled down to their most salient points that you can consume in 15 minutes or less go to www.blinkist.com/wolf for a 7-day free trial.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cindy Stulberg is an internationally respected psychologist and is the Director of The Institute of Interpersonal Psychotherapy which provides psychological assessment and counseling for individuals and couples, groups and families and has done so for the past 35 years. In this episode, Cindy and Eric discuss her book, Feeling Better: Beat Depression and Improve Your Relationships with Interpersonal Psychotherapy.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Cindy Stulberg and I Discuss… Her book, Feeling Better: Beat Depression and Improve Your Relationships with Interpersonal Psychotherapy  That your relationships hold the key to your happiness Interpersonal Psychotherapy The areas of life that trigger a depressive episode Drawing your social circle and asking questions about them How to build your social circle Conversation starters The difference between feelings and moods Questions for emotional enlightenment Getting input from others when looking to do things differently for them to make things better Paying attention to how you feel  The question: What’s the best, worst and most likely outcome? Linking rigid expectations to happiness How you can’t expect 1 person to meet all your needs Cindy Stulberg Links:The Institute of Interpersonal PsychotherapyTwitterFacebookPhlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there www.phlur.com/wolf and use promo code WOLF to get 20% off first custom sampler setQuip – Comes in an easy carrying case making it a great portable electric toothbrush – with timed settings to make brushing easy. It starts at just $25. Go to www.getquip.com/wolf to get your first refill pack for freeThe Upper Room – a global ministry where you can join a worldwide community of Christian believers in daily prayer and devotional practice. Go to www.upperroom.org/welcome to get a free 30-day trialIf you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes:Amy BanksEric MaiselSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices