Sexual Addiction:Strength/Hope/Recovery

It is so exhausting to deal with the collateral damage of being a partner. It is just so unfair!  You didn't ask for the betrayal with all of its emotional wounding and many partners wonder if they will ever be able to recover. To make matters worse, partners put themselves on the back burner. Partners have options to get intense help but they delay it because: They resent that they need to make space for this "_____." They resent that there is a need for this support and that it would take them away from their families for 3.5. or 7 days. And yet we know empiracallly that often times the brain needs to reset and being away in a supportive enviroment with others who have been through the same thing is exactly what needs to happen to recalibrate and find the safety and mindset to move forward into restoration of your own life as a couple and individually, Listen as Carol talks with Heidi Kinsella abouth the Partner Intensives that they have created together for Partners!

When a partner feels Post-Traumatic Growth, she is much more likely to want to share it with other women who need the encouragement! Listen as Carol the Coach, interviews a partner to find out how she got healthy and what she learned about herself!

Today Carol the Coach will be interviewing Floyd G. Potts who has written Why Your Man Will Not Stop Cheating Until He Does This. In his book Floyd unlocks the key to sex addiction recovery and he wants to tell you about it today. This is Floyd's life story and he wants to help others heal.

Today, Carol the Coach will be interviewing the founder of Safe Space who created it as a resource for women who needed perspective and healing due to the destructive impacts of a romantic relationship.  Having experienced an intensely destructive and confusing marriage, she knew how overwhelming, frightening, and heartbreaking it can be.  She explains in our interview, "I left that marriage terrified, disoriented, and very, very broken.  It took me a long time to put a lot of the pieces together- pieces that allowed me to not only make sense of the reality of what I had experienced, but also feel like I was healing personally.  Through my professional work and personal life, I have since come into contact with so many other courageous and beautiful women whose lives have been turned upside down by destructive relationships. And I am amazed (and saddened) by how many of us there are! Every relationship and every individual is different, and experiencing destructive and confusing patterns in a relationship covers a tremendous breadth of lived experiences.  That is why Safe Space is designed to empower women through teaching principles, providing tools, and also empowering women to see what is true—for themselves; to take back ownership of their own lives through engaging with their agency and sense of personal power. Safe Space will not tell you what to do in your relationship.  It will lay out principles and patterns to help improve your awareness.  It will help you differentiate between what healthy looks like, and destructive patterns to you and your relationship that need to be addressed."

Listen as Carol the Coach interviews Julie St Onge as she talks about how brainspotting can assist couples in their relational struggles. Brainspotting allows the emotional brain to reprocess trauma and reorganize it into the cortex or logical brain. It expedites the healing process. It is a process that involves using the optic nerve direction and bilateral music. We tap into where the trauma is and allow it to reprocess and reduce. This is not exposure therapy.  The benefit to couples spotting is that the wounding between the couple comes up immediately. This allows the couple to be more aware of the injuries and triggers that surface without any spoken words. They can be processed and even notice how one wound triggers another. Couples experience connection at a deep level as the emotional base heals. This allows more effective communication and use of tools and skills.

Carol the Coach interviews Dr. Jill Manning, the creator of a Therapeutic Separation Planning Guide. This one-of-a-kind guide provides clinicians, coaches, and couples with a highly structured, worksheet-style resource for planning a customized therapeutic separation. Over 120 open-ended questions cover key topics for separating couples. In addition to a visually appealing layout, expert tips, research data, and quotes are included to assist couples in organizing a therapeutic separation that is as healing as possible. This digital resource is a must-have for anyone contemplating a therapeutic separation, or for professionals working with couples who are candidates for this type of intervention. A Therapeutic Separation Planning Guide is a 59-page PDF digital document that is divided into two main sections. Section one is for individual brainstorming by each partner, and section two is where the finalized therapeutic separation agreement comes together and is signed by the couple and the professionals involved. Each section includes worksheet-style pages filled with questions that are essential for creating a clear and effective therapeutic separation. Carol and Dr. Jill will be discusssing why this guide creates more safety for couples as they navigate their needs.   The open-ended questions cover topics such as: Purpose & GoalsStrengths & WeaknessesTiming & LengthExpectations for Individual WorkExpectations for Couples WorkLiving ArrangementsParenting ResponsibilitiesFamily ActivitiesCouple CommunicationDivision of Household ResponsibilitiesFinancesPhysical AffectionSexual IntimacyDatingHolidays & Special EventsWorship & Spiritual PracticesHandling Issues or Disagreements that AriseSobriety

Listen as Carol the Coach interviews Maurice Crane who is forming a new outreach for men who are struggling with sexual integrity. Grace Based Recovery is the foundation of Be Broken Ministries in San Antonio Texas. Be Broken Ministries is a ministry to men, wives, families with an emphasis on recovery from unwanted sexual behaviors, otherwise known as sex addiction.  Be Broken's flagship outreach is the Gateway to Freedom Weekend Workshops held in San Antonio, TX, Orlando FL and Mt. Bethel PA.  A new outreach is forming to help churches and faith based community leaders come together to continue to address the issue of epidemic sexual addiction:  Grace Based Recovery Groups.  In a Grace Based Recovery group you create an environment of safety for men to gather to share their deepest of sexual struggles as well as their marital/family issues and find the reception warm and inviting to help men, over time, open up to a place of vulnerability. It is an accountability group with an emphasis on growing together through an 8 week training taken from the book Grace Based Recovery by Jonathan Daugherty, founder of Be Broken. Every quarter you start fresh with an 8 week training for new people, but then also hold accountability groups weekly as the group grows.  This is in addition to other groups out there, just a different angle. There is also an emphasis on doing things together as a chance to serve your local community together instead of always living in the framework of me-centric, sex-centric addiction.

Partners who experience berayal trauma can learn how to deal with the impact it has on their health. Today, Carol the Coach, interviews 2 partner betrayal specialists who have helped with other specialists to create a workshop for women who need to reclaim their lives. In this workshop, women will be able to : 1. Learn from partner betrayal trauma and behavioral health specialists 2. Grieve the losses with other women on a similar journey 3. Claim and give voice to their Body Bears the Burden path 4. Honor their story, honor your body, honor yourself Listen as Dr. Janice Caudill and Julie StOnges talk about this healing workshop available on Jan 14th from 9-0pm EST.  They would also like for you to take their survey to gain research on how partner betrayal has impacted you!

Today, Carol the Coach interviews a listener who is confused about his status and his spouses status.There has been many types of betrayal by his partner and he wants help navigating how to keep himself safe. He has much resentment about the betrayals that she was a part of and wants some clarity from Carol the Coach.

Tony Blevins and his wife Rebecca recently started a coaching practice with a two-fold mission: to help men recover from sex addiction and provide resources to their spouses who experience betrayal trauma. Tony uses  motivational interviewing techniques to help men develop and maintain effective sobriety plans so they can lead a healthy sеxual life free of compulsive urges and unwanted behaviors. Rebecca writes her blog for two reasons. It is healing for her to share her feelings and experiences. She also wants to validate you and to let you know that you are not alone, you are not crazy, and you are going to be OK.  Listen as Carol the Coach finds out how this couple has found post traumatic growth.