

Securely Attached
Dr. Sarah Bren
Securely Attached is your go-to parenting podcast, supporting moms and dads from pregnancy all the way through their child's adolescence and every stage in between.
Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship.
And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We're answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the "rules."
From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parent—this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust.
About Sarah Bren, PhD
Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.
Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship.
And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We're answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the "rules."
From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parent—this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust.
About Sarah Bren, PhD
Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Mar 7, 2024 • 19min
Q&A: What is the best way to allow my preschooler to play with gender norms?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:10 - Playing with gender norms is developmentally typical for preschoolers and is how they learn to make meaning of things. 3:12 - For most parents, this is less a worry of our child's playful experimentation and more about how the world will respond to them. 8:50 - You can have family rules and still be supportive of your child's experimentation and play - they are not mutually exclusive. 10:08 - We can be quick to jump to questioning what these actions mean for our child's identity development, but often at this age they are just playing. 10:45 - It's helpful to be mindful of the different societal expectations of boys versus girls with gender norms. 15:04 - Playing out the fantasy your child has in the moment can sometimes satisfy their desire. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Mar 5, 2024 • 49min
Raising conscious kids: A thoughtful exploration of bias, cultural identity, and diversity with Dr. Dana E. Crawford
Discover how to navigate bias and guide your children toward a future of genuine cultural understanding and allyship! Join me for a vulnerable and honest conversation on how we can navigate bias, and nurture cultural and racial awareness and inclusivity in ourselves and our children with pediatric and clinical psychologist, Dr. Dana E. Crawford. Dr. Crawford is the developer of the Crawford Bias Reduction Theory & Training (CBRT), a systematic approach to reducing bias, prejudice, and racism, and she has recently opened pre-ordering for her newly released R.A.C.E. Cards aimed at helping foster open communication around issues of race. In this episode, Dr. Crawford guides us on a journey of self-reflection, teaching about strategic vulnerability and the essential steps to reduce bias in our lives and in the way we raise our children. This episode promises to be a transformative experience, offering valuable insights that will stay with you long after the conversation ends.

Feb 29, 2024 • 24min
Q&A: How can I get my 3-year-old to do things they don't want to do?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 2:20 - At 3 years old, kids often start to have more desires for autonomy. 4:13 - The more we can be a predictable container and create consistent routines and boundaries for our kids, the less they will feel a need to test limits. 7:30 - Theory of Mind is the ability to understand that there are perspectives different from one's own. This only starts coming online at around 5 years old. 10:42 - Understanding your 3-year-old's brain development helps you to take their behaviors less personally. 11:55 - Building distress tolerance and impulsivity control will ultimately translate into executive functioning skills over time. 16:24 - How to stretch your child to help them to get from A to Z. 19:20 - There is a whole different skill set for doing something when you don't feel like doing it versus just the skill required to perform the specific task in and of itself (like getting dressed in the morning versus getting dressed in the morning WHEN YOU'D RATHER BE PLAYING). ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Feb 27, 2024 • 48min
How mentally strong people handle life's up's and downs: Unpacking honesty, kindness, guilt, and intentionality with Amy Morin
Discover how being self-aware and intentional in your actions can shape your children's emotional resilience! Joining me today is licensed clinical social worker and the author of 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do, Amy Morin. In this episode, Amy and I are shedding light on how parents, couples, and friends can harness this empowering mindset. From fostering curiosity and confidence to navigating complex emotions like guilt and values like honesty and kindness, we're providing you with practical tools for strengthening your own mental wellness and raising mentally resilient kids, too.

Feb 22, 2024 • 24min
Q&A: How do I support my child through distress without rescuing them immediately?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:28 - This age is when "stranger danger" and object permanence comes online with typical cognitive development. 6:47 - Crying to alert you that they don't prefer being held by another safe adult that is not Mom doesn't always mean they are in distress. 9:41 - Building resilience means reflecting our child's feelings back to them and staying calm in the face of that upset - your feelings are real, and they're safe. 12:05 - Self-regulating and titrating your responsiveness are two key elements of intervening in this exchange. 17:42 - When is this a matter of being held (by a safe adult), and when is this a matter of respecting their bodily autonomy and teaching consent when your child is a baby? In this episode, I talked about The Authentic Parent. CLICK HERE if you want to learn more about my self-paced course that teaches you how to confidently move through your first year of parenthood. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Feb 20, 2024 • 1h
ADHD and attachment security: How to connect with and support your neurodiverse child with Dr. Norrine Russell
Unlock the transformative power of understanding and connecting with your child's ADHD brain - rather than fighting against it! Joining me is the founder of Russell Coaching for Students and the author of Asking the Right Questions Before, During, and After Your Child's ADHD Diagnosis, Dr. Norrine Russell. If you have a child with ADHD, you won't want to miss this episode where we're sharing personal insights, evidence-based techniques, and empowering strategies to guide parents on a journey towards fostering empathy, embracing your child's strengths, and helping them reach their full potential. PRODUCTS FOR ADDITIONAL SUPPORT THAT I LOVE: If your child (or you!) has ADHD, you're going to love all the products from BestSelf as much as I do! CLICK HERE and use code DRSARAHBREN15 to save 15% off your entire purchase!

Feb 15, 2024 • 21min
Q&A: How do I know when my child's anxiety requires a mental health intervention?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 1:52 - When is it appropriate to seek help from a mental health professional to help your child manage their anxiety and fears? 4:40 - How to identify the difference between our child's natural desire for information versus a desire for us to soothe their anxiety. 8:45 - Addressing concepts like death with your child is difficult because it is a scary thing for adults to confront too, which can lead to parents to do more accommodating than is actually helpful long-term. 13:05 - Asking yourself "why now?" - Working to identify if there is anything that activated this sudden shift so you can work toward targeting the root of the problem. 14:48 - Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) is a great resource for parents: LISTEN: Listen to my interview with the creator of SPACE, Dr. Eli Lebowitz READ: Breaking Free of Childhood Anxiety and OCD by Dr. Eli Lebowitz THERAPY SERVICES: If you are in NY State and would like to learn about Upshur Bren Psychology Group's SPACE individual and group therapy options, click here to learn more. 18:38 - What to Do When You Worry Too Much and What to Do When Your Brain Gets Stuck are workbooks we use in our practice and are helpful resources to use with your child. ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Feb 13, 2024 • 52min
Love, intimacy, and parenthood: Fostering our romantic relationships with Dr. Tracy Dalgleish
Did you know that a staggering 67% of couples experience a dip in relationship satisfaction after the birth of a child? Joining me is clinical psychologist, couples therapist, and sought-after relationship expert, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish. Dr. Tracy is the founder of Be Connected Digital, the author of I Didn't Sign Up for This, and the host of the I'm Not Your Shrink podcast. Today, we discuss how to signal for support and communicate our needs (even when sleep-deprived) to our partner, the impact our new identity as parents has on our relationships, and how to navigate the mental load of parenthood. Our hope is to normalize the struggles many parents face in this season, offering a reassuring message: you are not alone and there are things you can do to strengthen your partnership and deepen your connection. EPISODE SHOW NOTES: Click Here DR. TRACY'S FREE GUIDE: 10 Scripts for Defensiveness WANT ADDITIONAL PARENTING SUPPORT: Click HERE to check out my 2.5 hour on-demand parenting course, The Science of Tantrums, that teaches you the exact tools you need for responding in the moment and reducing your toddler's tantrums over time.

Feb 8, 2024 • 25min
Q&A: When I tell my child to stop, they just dig their heels in more—what can I do?
>>> Enrollment is now open for Parenting by Design, my simple, evidenced-based coaching program for parenting your sensitive child in a way that increases cooperation, discharges power struggles, and rebuilds their trust in your authority–all while supporting your child's mental health and your own. Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... 3:50 - At 3-years-old you need to physically be a container for your child, so you might need to be more intentional about what environments are conducive for that during this stage. 7:28 - Try to incorporate moments where you notice the good and use positive reinforcement to supplement the discipline you need to do. 9:38 - When we discipline a child, they may feel ashamed, guilty, or embarrassed, which can cause them to become more dysregulated (but that doesn't necessarily mean we are doing something wrong). 13:48 - "A kid needs a target if we want them to hit that target." 17:20 - It's okay to give your child an out to allow them to save face when they are doing something "wrong." ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨

Feb 6, 2024 • 51min
Back by popular demand: How to change your child's behavior in just 3 weeks
>>> HEAD HERE TO GRAB THE FREEBIE FOR THIS EPISODE: Your Step-By-Step Guide for How to Change Your Child's Behavior in Just 3 Weeks! Back by popular demand! For parents who want to learn my simple framework for how to change your child's behavior in just 3 weeks! In this episode, I am breaking down the 10 simple steps I teach to the families in my clinical practice to help them make small shifts to their own behavior that will result in some big changes in their child. Plus, download my interactive workbook for an easy-to-follow, customized game plan you can use to start seeing meaningful change leading to more cooperation and family harmony! And for a limited-time only, join me in Parenting by Design, my coaching program for parents of sensitive kids that teaches you how to increase cooperation, discharge power struggles, and rebuild your child's trust in your authority–all while supporting their mental health and your own.


