Shameless Leadership

Melissa DaSilva is a clinical social worker and founder of the group practice East Coast Mental Wellness in Providence, RI. She serves as an individual and couples therapist, as well as a group facilitator. She has spent many years working in schools as a school social worker and has an upcoming podcast titled Pride Connections. Melissa is an expert in the field of transgender topics, and works with many trans and nonbinary youth to provide support throughout their transition. She collaborates with outside providers to ensure comprehensive care for those who wish to pursue physical transition. Melissa enjoys working with clients on LGBTQ topics, academic issues, bipolar disorder, and personality disorders. She also has experience supporting clients with anxiety, depression, and life transitions. Her practice is welcoming towards all genders and sexualities, as well as poly and kink couples. She uses a variety of approaches in her therapy including pet therapy, meditation, and places a lot of focus on sleep and nutritional health. When Melissa isn't running her business she is creating art and selling it at local markets.  Listen in to hear Melissa share: What all the letters mean in LGBTQQIA (they are all different and all important) What the terms cisgender, non-binary, gender-expansive and gender fluid mean The difference between sex and gender How to talk to explain sexual orientation and gender to kids in very simple terms How can you and your family be supportive of LGBTQQIA children How to can you be supportive if you suspect your child might be LGBTQQIA How to ask someone about their sexual orientation and/or gender expression How to use gender pronouns correctly and appropriately  Links Mentioned:Podcast Website: PrideConnections.comPrivate Practice Website: eastcoastmentalwellness.comMelissa’s Email: Melissa@prideconnections.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Change is the WORST. Or at least that’s what I used to tell myself – for like 30 years. After becoming a mom I spent a full year feeling completely run over by all the change and unpredictability of my new mommy life. I kept wait for everything to “go back to normal.” As you can guess – that never happened.  I had to resolve myself to the constant change that is motherhood.  As someone who thrives on routine and predictability, that was a tough pill to swallow. But then I looked at some of ways I had embraced change in other areas of my life over the last 10 years and I was able to slooooooowly start embracing motherhood and change in a new and more positive light.  Before I tell you how to get over your fear of change, let me help you understand why you’re afraid of change:  The known is always more comfortable than the unknown We live in a fear based culture – so we’re programmed to be afraid of what we do not yet know We like consistency, predictability and control We’re scared of failure, mistakes, and of wasting our time and energy  And now – the good stuff - how to get over your fear of change: Recognize that you are already in constant flux and transition Consider change an opportunity for a “software upgrade” Know there will be moments of panic and doubt and possibly a sense of complete failure and/or regret Know that practicing and embracing change makes it feel less burdensome Understand that the best way to conquer fear and anxiety is to prove to yourself you CAN do the things you are afraid of change is not bad – it’s just different  Links Mentioned:Sponsor: Aaptiv.com (use code SMA30 for a free 30 day trial)    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tracey and Joanne are mothers and sisters who are living the healthiest, happiest life possible. Together they created Sistermixin’ to improve their families health and spread the word of their life changing discoveries.  They are on a mission to share how you can improve your health and your life by removing toxic additives and preservatives from your diet.  Their mission all started when Joana’s young daughter was having significant health and behavior issues. Desperate for answers and willing to try anything, Jo removed additives from her daughter’s diet and saw her daughter change before her very eyes.  Shortly after this life changing discovery, Joana shared her tips with Tracey and they have never looked back.  Listen in to hear Tracey and Jo share:  How Jo was able to completely change her daughter’s health and behavior by changing her diet What kinds of preservatives your kids are eating that you don’t know are harmful What to look for when reading food labels What additives should be most avoided The truth about food dyes and MSG (and how they are hidden everywhere…) Simple steps to get started with additive free eating  How to support your child’s special eating habits in social settings  Links Mentioned:Website: sistermixin.comPodcast: The Whole CircleSistermixin on InstagramStudy: Southhampton Study of Food Dyes and Hyperactivity in ChildrenCourse: Additive Free Made EasyFood App: ChemicalMaze.comEpisode Sponsor: Aaptiv.com (use the code SMA30 to get your free 30 day trial)  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I think one of the hardest parts of motherhood is all. the. things.  I don’t mean physical things – although there is SO MUCH STUFF. Everywhere. Books, legos, art, clothes, balls, more legos, petrified snacks… But I’m talking more about all the things you need to keep track of on a daily/weekly/monthly/yearly basis. Your brain is constantly firing in multiple directions and that makes it hard to actually forge a path in any one direction for any length of time.  I think this is why we often feel so stuck. We intend to be really productive, but we get distracted or sucked into something unexpected and our best laid plans fall to the way side. Over and over and over. To the point that we don’t even remember what are best laid plans were…. On a small scale this happens every time we get interrupted by a text or we open out inbox. On a larger scale, this happens when we don’t have built in #tinyhabits to create space in our lives and our heads daily.  In this episode I’ll share 5 quick and simple #tinyhabits that will give you energy and help you create the MOMENTUM you need to move forward in any area of your life you choose! Links Mentioned:SMA Episode 102: Scott Colby – Say It With GratitudeEpisode Sponsor: Aaptiv.com (use the code SMA30 to get your free 30 day trial)  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Melissa Fox Lehman (layman) is the CEO and co-founder of Pogo Rides. For the last 15 years, she’s been helping Fortune 50 companies and nonprofits develop strategy and roll-out global programs. She loves developing actionable strategy and seeing those strategies brought to life. When she became a mom she knew she wanted to focus her energies on building something to make life easier for busy parents. This was the genesis for Pogo. Melissa and her team are committed to helping families find safe and flexible transportation for their school-age children. As a mother of two, she understands the logistical challenges faced by busy parents of busy kids and believes in the power of communities to help each other live fuller and less stressful lives. Safety, community, and ease are the core tenants of Pogo Rides. I wanted to have Melissa on the show to talk about how her view of work changed after she had kids. She very consciously chose to shift directions and build a business that could support other families. Her professional mission has evolved right along side her path in motherhood, as I think often happens.  Listen in to hear Melissa share: The power of sharing in your community  Why it’s ok to outsource duties Why asking for support helps you and your community How we can create a lot more win/win opportunities among our neighbors How to revolutionize your carpool network  Links Mentioned:Website: Pogorides.comMelissa’s Email: mlehman@pogorides.comSponsor: aaptiv.com (use code SMA30 for free 30 day trial)  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ok, I’ll admit it… I was hard on myself last week. HARD.  I have a lot going on and I let it get to my head. Sometimes when we have too many things going on we feel we’re not doing any one thing really well. That was me. Just feeling all sorts of mediocre… AND super frazzled. I had a pity party. I even invited a few people to join me. Luckily, they were kind and helped me get out of my head. I also practiced KINDNESS toward myself.  Being kind to yourself is important. No, it is crucial.  Especially when things are chaotic, frantic, overwhelming… Here are 5 ways to be more kind to yourself when the going gets tough:  Practice personal development, even if just for a few minutes Create ME time – especially when you don’t think you have it Catch yourself as you’re falling Move – sweat, if possible Ask for help  Links Mentioned:Book: Year of Yes by Shonda RhimesBook: Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle MeltonBook: The Desire Map By Danielle LaPorteBook: The Slight Edge by Jeff OlsonBook: Daring Greatly by Brene BrownSponsor: aaptiv.com (use code SMA30 for free 30 day trial)  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Amy Lang is a childhood sexuality expert and parent educator who helps parents talk to their kids about sex and sexuality. Her engaging, humorous and inspiring style shows parents how to turn conversations they dread into something they look forward to and embrace whole-heartedly. Though her business, Birds + Bees + Kids® Amy helps parents of all beliefs have easy, open and effective conversations about sex with their kids. She is the author of Birds + Bees + YOUR Kids - A Guide To Sharing Your Beliefs About Sexuality, Love and Relationships and Dating Smarts – What Every Teen Needs To Know To Date, Relate Or Wait. Amy has been featured in the Wall Street Journal, Huffington Post Live and Babble.com. Learn more about her work at www.birdsandbeesandkids.com  I have been dying to get Amy on the show for awhile now because I knew there might be things I was already behind on in talking to my 4 year old about sexuality. In this interview, Amy helped me get my ducks in a row and she’ll help you too!  Listen in to hear Amy share: How her discomfort in talking to her own 4 year old about sexuality catapulted her into a career as a childhood sex expert At what age you should be talking to your kids about sex and sexuality (hint: NOW) Why talking to your kids about sex includes talking to them about masturbation (especially girls) How you can become more comfortable and less awkward as you venture into territory that might be uncomfortable for you The reality of why were seeing more sexualized behavior and mature dress in younger children and how you can protect your child The 3 ways you can protect your kids from sexual abuse Where Radical Responsibility comes into play with parenting and how to find your boundaries between being the parent and being accepted by other parents  Links Mentioned:Amy’s Website: Birdsandbeesandkids.comBirds+Bees+Kids on FacebookBook: It’s Not the StorkApp: Aaptiv.com (use code SMA30 for free 30 day trial!)  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The truth about failure: Failure does not have to suck. In fact, it is 100% possible to WIN while failing. As with most things, it’s all a matter of perspective.  I firmly believe you should fail often and fail fast. That is how you open more doors to see all the possibilities that lie ahead.  Listen in to learn: Why failure can make goals seem less attainable Why failure makes creates FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real) How failure can lead to self sabotage  Then learn my top tips in failing: Fail often Expect hiccups Be ready to pivot ID #tinywins Silver linings Model failure to your kids  Failure is not a loss. It’s an opportunity.  Links Mentioned:Psychology Today Article: 10 Surprising Facts about FailureShameless Mom MOMENTUM Mastermind: https://smamastermind.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Shasta Nelson, M.Div., is the Founder of GirlFriendCircles.com, a women’s friendship learning community. Her spirited and soulful voice for strong female relationships can be found in her books Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness and Friendships Don’t Just Happen! The Guide to Creating a Meaningful Circle of GirlFriends. She also writes at ShastasFriendshipBlog.com and in the Huffington Post, speaks across the country, and is a friendship expert in the media appearing on such shows as Katie Couric and the Today Show.  Shasta is a 10 year Friendship Expert. She knows all the research on friendships – and on loneliness, which is plaguing us even though we are more virtually connected than ever before. Shasta is joining us in The Shameless Mom Academy to share the keys to building friendships and sustaining friendships, which can be a challenge in motherhood. Yes, your time is limited, but the truth is you friendships have never been more crucial.  Listen in to hear Shasta share:  The 3 S’s of a satisfying friendship Why it is essential that we feel loved, known, and supported The epidemic of loneliness that doctors are saying is the biggest health epidemic of our time How our relationship with our spouse is different that our relationships with girlfriends – and why you need BOTH The power of modeling friendship to your children and how to make sure boys are especially aware of the power and necessity of friendship The 3 requirements that must be present for a healthy friendship  Links Mentioned:Join Shasta: Girlfriendcircles.com Resource: Frientimacy QuizBook: Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness Book: Friendships Don’t Just Happen! The Guide to Creating a Meaningful Circle of GirlFriends  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The TRUTH about fitness is that our society perpetuates a ton of myths that make exercise very confusing. That confusion leads to us wasting our time at the gym or not exercising at all because we don’t understand the truth of how easy and simple exercise can be.  Listen in to hear: Three fitness LIES that are damaging your results A BONUS tip that impacts weight loss The dangers in using exercise as punishment How long you need to exercise to make it effective The difference between exercising for health benefits and exercising for weight loss The significance of food intake compared to exercise when it comes to using exercise for weight loss  Links Mentioned:Today’s sponsor: aaptiv.com (use code SMA30 to get a free month trial) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices