Make Life Less Difficult

My guest today is Nicole Anderson.Nicole is a seasoned professional with over 20 years of experience in driving organizational success through human-centered change management. As a Partner at The Kaler Group, her unique ability to integrate people, processes, and technology has made her a pivotal force in enhancing organizational effectiveness and fostering positive culture and employee experiences. She is known for her strategic vision, innovative problem-solving skills, and a deep understanding of organizational and team dynamics.  She partners with her clients to empower people and teams to thrive and achieve lasting success.  In our conversation today, Nicole shares pieces of her journey of seeking freedom and learning how to define success for herself.  She shares about both the joys and challenges of this.  When we shift measures of success from the external expectations around us to the internal desires and values, it can be disruptive… and liberating.Nicole, thank you for sharing your stories, your reflections, your wisdom.  I’m so grateful to know you and be inspired by you.  Thank you for the light you are creating in the world and in the lives of those you work with!To learn more about Nicole and her work, you’ll find links below:LinkedInSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Linda Hoopes. Linda helps organizations, teams, and individuals thrive in turbulence.  She’s a writer and speaker on the topics of resilience, change, and employee well-being. Linda is a returning guest, having been on the podcast a couple of years ago with Kris Burbank, where they talked about their co-authored book, Embracing Another Normal: Resilience Stories and Strategies for Raising Children with Disabilities.Linda is back with me today to dig a little deeper into her work around resilience and her framework of Prosilience.  Her book Prosilience: Building Your Resilience for a Turbulent World, helps us assess our readiness for challenge and design a plan to become even stronger. Linda is also a sailor, musician, photographer, and traveler.Linda, thank you for this inspiring and thought-provoking conversation.  Your framework on building the muscles to help us respond effectively during times of turbulence are incredibly practical and applicable in life!  I’m grateful for your perspectives, groundedness, and wisdom.To learn more about Linda and the work she does in the world, you’ll find links below:Resilience Alliance404.309.3331 (c)Calendar: https://doodle.com/mm/lindahoopes/booking Interested in more? Sign up for my newsletters:Prosilience: Strategies for building personal and organizational challenge readinessOrganizational Change Intersections: Fresh perspectives on effective change in organizationsFamily History ProjectsThe Journals of Emma Troutman Boylan: My great-grandmother's journalsTravels with K: My great-aunt's world adventures Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Elif Malmqvist.Elif is an executive coach who is currently studying cognitive neuroscience so she can better understand the why behind human emotions and connections.  Elif is passionate about helping people understand neuroplasticity, specifically around understanding negative thoughts or baggage from the past and how to create more positivity and happiness through better understanding of our brains.Elif and I met many years ago through Margareta Sjolund, who has also been a guest on my podcast.  Our passion for emotional intelligence training linked us and yet because we both moved multiple times to difference countries, this conversation is the first we have had in many years!  Elif is currently based in Malaysia but has lived in various countries in Asia and Europe.  Elif, thank you so much for this inspiring conversation. Thank you for sharing with us your stories and what you are learning about the brain and how it can help create more happiness in our lives.  I can’t wait to hear more about your research!To learn more about Elif and her work, you’ll find links below.Connect with Elif on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elifmalmqvist/ Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Jules Kuroda.Jules’s life passion is helping people get past the ideas they have of themselves to unlock more fulfillment. Our minds are wonderful and dangerous tools, she says, depending on how we wield them.Jules loves complexity and strives for simplicity and believes the world is more interesting with our paradoxes explored.Her aim is to bring more joy and understanding into the world, and I believe our conversation today will bring you both joy and new understanding of the world and yourself.Jules’s book, The N8 Self: You are more than your Mind, Body, and Emotions, offers a tangible way to understand and create more meaning and purpose in our lives.  You’ll hear Jules share principles from her book today that are indeed really practical and tangible.  Jules, thanks for sharing your insights, your stories, your wisdom.  The work you are doing is adding so much light and connection to the world and I’m honored to help share it here.You can find links in the show notes to learn more about Jules and her work.Jules's Website: https://www.n8self.com/Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

Welcome back to Make Life Less Difficult.My guest today is Michael Ulrich.Michael is a contemplative psychotherapist based in Copenhagen, Denmark, with a background in clinical practice, systems thinking, and integral development. His work bridges traditional therapeutic modalities with emergent, self-organizing ways of relating and healing.In our conversation today, Michael and I explore the ongoing practice of presence—what it means to meet ourselves and others without needing to fix or explain. We speak about narrative and identity, power and subtlety, and what emerges when we listen deeply, even to silence.This dialogue invited me to slow down, to notice the patterns beneath the words, and to trust the wisdom that arises in shared reflection. Michael’s insights—both personal and professional—are a powerful reminder of how growth and groundedness can coexist.Michael, thank you for this rich and layered conversation. I’m still unpacking it.To learn more about Michael and his work, you can connect with him here:Michael’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/psykologmichaelulrich/Let’s dive in.Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Andra Davidson.Andra is a collaboratively trained Certified Divorce Coach and mediator who created the Better Than Before Divorce™ Program to provide emotional support to men and women navigating divorce.Her clients benefit from her 25+ years of experience in crisis communications, branding, and marketing, as well as my calm strength and commitment to tangible results. She believes anyone dealing with divorce can learn to minimize conflict, communicate effectively, and prioritize healthy coparenting.  Her strength-based approach provides the tools and skills needed to reduce overwhelm and make informed decisions based on goals, not emotions.Andra’s favorite past time is enjoying her blended family:  amazing 24-year-old twins, two incredible step-kids, and three adorable dogs.Andra and I met through a storytelling workshop and I was delighted when she agreed to come on the podcast!  Andra graciously shares pieces of her own journey of a divorce she didn’t choose and how she has come to find her strengths, confidence, and purpose on the other side.  We talk about the value of finding your NorthStar through the process of divorce, setting manageable goals, having a support system, and determining the best path of parenting if kids are involved, including the difference between co-parenting and parallel parenting.Andra, thank you so much for this inspiring conversation.  Thank you for sharing deeply meaningful stories and wisdom alongside practical and tangible strategies to make divorce a little less difficult.To connect with Andra and find out more about her work in the world, please see the links below.  There are also links to the books and resources Andra mentions. Website: betterthanbeforedivorce.comSocial Media: https://www.facebook.com/CompassRoseDivorceCoachhttps://www.instagram.com/andradavidson_/https://www.linkedin.com/in/andradavidson/https://www.youtube.com/@CompassRoseDivorce Resources:Bill Eddy, High Conflict Institute, and all his books - https://highconflictinstitute.com/Let Them, Mel RobbinsThe Four Agreements, Don Miguel RuizThe Gifts of Imperfection, Brene BrownParentteam.com (amazing parenting coaches)Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Debra Kiva. Debra is a certified grief educator and coach who works with, and is trained by, renowned grief expert, David Kessler.  Debra facilitates loss groups for Kessler's online grief community, Tender Hearts, and co-facilitates loss groups for grieving complex relationships. And she supports people facing anticipatory grief, the grief of losing a loved one by long term illness/dementia, as she has deep experience in dementia and sibling loss.  As an adult she has experienced the loss of her brother, both parents (who were very difficult/abusive when she was a child), and many friends. Debra also devotes her time as the Director of the Hummingbird Choir, a joyful singing community for those with memory challenges and she is the Co-Director of Yuba Spirit Threshold Singers and a member of Whidbey Island Bedside Singers which brings gentle songs to those on the threshold of life, bringing moments of ease and comfort for clients, family and caregivers.  Debra has begun a new group for working with those who are grieving parents or caregivers were neglectful, narcissistic, emotionally absent, addicted, or mentally ill. She and her co-facilitator Katia Miniovich have created a place where participants can feel understood within the complexities and confusion which may arise from these losses, as these losses are often not recognized by the culture or peers who have had different upbringings. Debra believes that healing happens within connection and she is dedicated to serving others, letting them know they are not alone and are held with compassion. She supports clients on Zoom and in person in her office on Whidbey Island, Washington.I first saw Debra’s name through a notice of her grief group and was so intrigued by this offering, recognizing complex grief and loss.  I reached out and I’m so glad she agreed to come on the podcast.  She and I talk about this deep complexity of grieving loss when the relationships were difficult, for many different reasons.  This isn’t something that I’ve seen talked about in this way before and I share various pieces of my own journey of losing my first husband Eric and the complexity of grieving while recognizing the challenges of our marriage and relationship.We recorded this conversation in early April and it is serendipitous that it’s being published now, as my father passed away just a few days ago, after a slow decline from Dementia with Lewy Bodys.  I was listening to this conversation to get it ready for publication while with my family during my dad’s final few days and wow, I was so grateful!Debra, I’m so incredibly grateful for the connection with you and for this conversation.  Your beautiful and graceful presence is a gift in this world.  Creating spaces for talking about and experiencing grief without judgement is an incredible way to make life less difficult. And one final thing before we jump into our conversation, I just want to share this quote from Debra:  You don’t get over grief, you just continue and grow around it….  You have to figure out how to move forward and grow around it and find more love than pain.If you are grieving the loss of a loved one, please know that you are not alone.  Don’t hesitate to reach out if you’d like to connect. Debra KivaCertified Grief Educator/Support Provider Certified Grief Coach Certified Grief Movement Guide debkiva@gmail.com530 913-0320Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Milena Trevisani.Before becoming a coach, Milena worked for 20 years in the corporate world, and which took her to many different countries.  Along the way, she met lots of extraordinary people who opened her eyes to the possibilities that we all hold within us. During her 10 years at The New York Times as a Director of Business Development and Sales, Milena had a coach who helped her and laid the foundations for her coaching passion. While at the NYT, Milena began to understand that to become a leader you have to train, and secondly, her coach helped her to see that a task is more than just a task. It’s who we become while we are doing it that matters. She became fascinated with human behaviour and relationships and Milena shares that she thinks that’s what led her to the life she has now.In our conversation today, Milena shares pieces of her story that shaped her life – losing her dad unexpected at 13 years old, being unable to afford university and creating a successful life despite that, and always holding a desire to study and get her degree.  And now, she has started that journey, realizing it’s not too late.We talk about how stories are contagious – for both positive and negative – so how can we recognize the stories our brains are absorbing?  We discuss the importance of finding the good tension between our dreams and the practical necessities of life.  And the power of choosing what we “feed” our brains.This conversation is deeply inspiring and I’m so honored to share it with you.Milena, thank you for your stories, your wisdom, your thought-provoking and eye-opening metaphors.  I’m a better person for having met you and learned from you and I know that those who listen to this will feel similarly!To learn more about Milena and her work, please see the links below.Milena's Website: https://milenatrevisanicoaching.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/milena-trevisani-467b191/Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Maura Lightfoot.Maura is a leadership and culture coach with a wealth of experience and knowledge.  From human resources in the Middle East to financial services management consulting in London to nonprofit organizational culture in Washington D.C., Maura’s experience equips her with a unique perspective that is both grounded and global.In our conversation today, Maura and I talk about her model of Exploration Leadership.  We dive into the curiosity and bravery it takes to explore – both within ourselves and throughout our worlds.  We talk about the beautiful concept of slowing down so we can meet ourselves right where we are.  And we touch on the beauty of the differences among us AND the core desires of every human – safety, belonging, dignity.Maura, thank you for this beautiful conversation.  It is an inspiring exploration and I’m still pondering and reflecting on so much of what you shared.  Your stories and work are contributing to making the world a brighter, more connected place.To learn more about Maura and the work she does, you’ll find links below.Maura's website: https://www.mclcoaching.org/Connect with Maura on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mauralightfoot/Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Mikaela Seligman.Mikaela is the Founder of the company, Lumin/Us, which offers tailored leadership coaching and education, facilitation, and organizational consulting.  Mikaela brings her 30+ years of experience leading in and also coaching/consulting for mission-driven organizations and leaders.At the heart of her work, Mikaela helps leaders have impact without burnout.  She’s worked her entire career to redefine outdated ideas about leadership.  Everyone, she says, wherever they sit in the social and organizational hierarchy - can heed the call to exercise leadership every day. The world needs us to do so more than ever.Mikaela has decades of experience applying the Adaptive Leadership framework and adult development theory in staff and senior organizational roles   She is a lifelong student and practitioner of somatics and mindfulness. She blends these and a range of emergent approaches in every aspect of her work.Our conversation today is a beautiful emerging of ideas and insights!  Mikaela shares pieces of her own journey that were incredibly difficult, including her parents divorcing when she was 6 years old, and her father dying when she was 17 years old.  She also shares about the people and practices that helped make those difficult times a little less difficult.  Mikaela, thank you for this inspiring and thought-provoking conversation.  Thank you for sharing your stories, your reflections, and your wisdom.  You truly bring a much-needed light into the world through your work and through just being you!  I’m so grateful our paths have crossed!To learn more about Mikaela and her work, you’ll find links below.Mikaela's website: https://www.luminusleadership.com/Connect with Mikaela on LinkedInSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra