Sex Chat for Christian Wives

About this episode Today's episode has a tantalizing title, but what we're really talking about are positions that work especially well for a wife, ones that don't work, and positions might give you a better opportunity to orgasm. Let's revisit some basic concepts first and discuss why sexual positioning matters. What are some of the more comfortable or pleasurable sex positions for the wife? Now how about what Bonny has called #positionfail? That is, positions you or others have tried that Did Not Work Out? What are some sex positions that could provide a good way for a wife to reach climax? Sponsor Click Here to Learn More From the Bible What does God have to say about positions? His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me. – Song of Songs 2:6, 8:3 Resources Episode 2: Sex Positions Episode 57: Listener Questions (includes thoughts on positions) Episode 87: Trying New Sex Positions Wedge Pillow – Married Dance (affiliate link) Why You Should Try This Sex Position | Hot, Holy & Humorous Sexual Positions in Your Marriage: Hey, I'm a Housewife, Not a Gymnast Unlock Your Orgasm: Through a Christian Lens by Bonny Logsdon Burns "Considering Sexual Positions," Hot, Holy, and Humorous: Sex in Marriage by God's Design, by J. Parker Coital Alignment Technique (CAT), a climax enhancing position Packing the Suitcase, Christian Friendly Sex Positions The first to identify the position J is referring to on Christian Friendly Sex Positions by emailing forchristianwives@gmail.com will receive a copy of her book, Hot, Holy & Humorous, AND Bonny's Unlock Your Orgasm. Wow!

Today, we discuss a question that a reader submitted recently: How far is too far? How much do I compromise? I know I'm not perfect. I know I could have showed up more in the bedroom and have said as much. But I do try. It's hard as a woman, wife and now mother of 2. He says I don't listen and no one ever listens. So, he demands I do things I do not like. At times, it's not so bad. I can't handle it when he is angry. He gets rough. And then when I ultimately refuse he is so fed up and angry he leaves me feeling like I just will never be able to make him happy. I am feeling hopeless. And I struggle with knowing if I really need to be doing more or if I'm over compromising. I love my husband. We have been together almost 9 years, and I consider him my best friend. However, at times I wonder if we can ever get past this to live a happy marriage. Sponsor Click HERE to Learn More And check out Bonny's STRONG WIVES website! From the Bible What does God have to say about this topic? The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. – 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. – Galatians 5:22-23 Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, saying, "I have gotten a man with the help of the Lord." – Genesis 4:1 As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. – Proverbs 27:17 But whether we are at home with the Lord or away from him, we still try our best to please him. – 2 Corinthians 9:10 (CEV) For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open. – Luke 8:17 Resources Who I am in Christ - pdf Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud & John Townsend (affiliate link) Setting Boundaries in the Bedroom | Hot, Holy & Humorous Q&A with J: Boundaries in the Bedroom | Hot, Holy & Humorous Are You in an Abusive or Destructive Marriage? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Signs of depression in men: What to know (medicalnewstoday.com) Faithful Counseling (now Better Help)- affiliate link Prevalence of Distress Associated With Difficulty Controlling Sexual Urges, Feelings, and Behaviors in the United States | Psychiatry and Behavioral Health | JAMA Network Open | JAMA Network (10% stat Bonny mentioned) Episode 109: Your Sexual Self How Should You Pray for Your Spouse? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Visit our website: forchristianwives.com

About this episode Today we're talking about feeling comfortable in your body. This is a struggle for so many women, and it affects every area of our lives—inside and outside the bedroom. So, ladies, when we say "getting comfortable with your body," what does that mean? And why is it so hard to do? What are some of ways that body discomfort shows up in women's lives? And, of course, feeling uncomfortable with your body tends to show up with a vengeance in the bedroom. Why is that the case, and what impact does body discomfort have on women's sex lives? What are some things women can do to begin that process and start moving forward? Sponsor Click Here to Shop at Infinite Moon From the Bible What does God have to say about getting comfortable with your body? So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. - Genesis 1:27 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13-14 Resources Body by God | The Forgiven Wife 4 Ways to Be Present During Sex | The Forgiven Wife A Wife's Breasts Have History! | The Forgiven Wife Enjoy a Plus-Size Sex Life, Part 1 | Honeycomb & Spice Enjoy a Plus-Size Sex Life, Part 2 | Honeycomb & Spice 3 Reasons to Love Your Body | Calm.Healthy.Sexy. 11 Ways to Love Your Body | Calm.Healthy.Sexy. How to Get Your Mind and Body on the Same Page | Calm.Healthy.Sexy. Episode 109: Your Sexual Self What Not to Wear | Watch Full Episodes & More! - TLC Body Image: Why Are We So Hard on Ourselves? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Feeling Beautiful: A Wife's Goal for 2015 | Hot, Holy & Humorous Real Women Come in All Shapes and Sizes | Hot, Holy & Humorous Getting Comfortable Being Naked with Your Husband | Hot, Holy & Humorous Tips for Confidently Baring It All for Your Hubby | Hot, Holy & Humorous Forget What You Look Like While Making Love | Hot, Holy & Humorous Grow Old With Me (Remastered 2010) - YouTube (based on Robert Browning poem) or the lovely cover from Mary Chapin Carpenter Episode 74: Getting Comfortable with Your Body - Sex Chat for Christian Wives

What do we do in our beds besides sex? Sleep, of course! Today we're going to talk about the relationship between sex and sleep. A recent study of over 3,400 women noted that those "who did not routinely get restful slumber were nearly twice as likely to report sexual problems, such as lack of desire or arousal." While researchers don't know which came first—poor sleep or sex problems—their study provides food for thought. How might poor sleep impact our bodies and thus our sexual functioning? How can regular sexual intimacy promote better sleep? Some people fall asleep right after sex, and some don't. Which type are you and why do you think that is? It's not always easy to secure enough sleep! Given the importance of quality sleep for our sexual intimacy and overall health, what tips do we have to help wives get a better's night sleep? Sponsor Click here to find your next pillow or sheets! From the Bible What does God have to say about sleep? There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his. – Hebrews 4:9-10 Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest." – Mark 6:31 In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety. – Psalm 4:8 Resources Better Sleep May Mean Better Sex for Women | Health News | US News Poor sleep nearly doubles risk of sexual dysfunction in women, study says (channel3000.com) Is Your Sex Life Getting Enough Sleep? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Sleepin' is Sexy • Bonny's Oysterbed7 4 Things to Do When You're Too Tired for Sex – CalmHealthySexy Does Sex Wake You Up or Make You Sleepy? | Hot, Holy & Humorous You Probably Need More Sleep – Here's How to Get It (calmhealthysexy.com) Binaural Beats: Sleep, Therapy, and Meditation (healthline.com) Visit our website: forchristianwives.com

Today we are exploring the term "sexual self." Your sexual self is an unfolding aspect of who you are, woven into the fabric of your being. What is identity and how would it relate to a sense of a wife's sexual self? Or in other words, how does your sexual self fit into the whole of who you are as a woman? What affects how comfortable you are with accessing this part of yourself? How do we integrate biblical principles into our sexual selves? What can a wife do to discover or rediscover her sexual self? Sponsor Click here for quality sheets at a great discount! Click here to visit Faithful Counseling (now Better Help) and connect with a fellow believer online within their network of licensed, professional therapists. From the Bible What does God have to say about your sexual self? For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. - Psalm 139:13-14 So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. - Genesis 1:27 Resources Breathe. Relax. Enjoy. How to Use Essential Oils to Increase Your Sensual Energy - CalmHealthySexy Husbands, How to Help Your Wife Feel Sexy - CalmHealthySexy What Makes You Feel Sexy? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Learn to Embrace Your Sexuality - The Forgiven Wife Has Your Sexuality Fallen Asleep? - The Forgiven Wife Park Your "Sexy" in the Garage - The Forgiven Wife Is Sex a Spiritual Experience in Your Marriage? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Episode 29: Lies Women Believe, Part 1 - Sex Chat for Christian Wives Episode 30: Lies Women Believe, Part 2 - Sex Chat for Christian Wives Get Your Sexy On - The Forgiven Wife 10 Things You Can Do to Feel Sexy This Weekend - The Forgiven Wife Praying Before, During, and After Sex | Hot, Holy & Humorous Unlock Your Orgasm by Bonny Logsdon Burns is coming soon! Follow her on Amazon here. Email Bonny about her test panel for vaginal dryness formulation Visit our website: forchristianwives.com

About this episode Today we're going to talk about what prioritizing sex means, what it doesn't mean, what gets in the way of it, and what it might look like in the lives and marriages of busy women. What does it mean to prioritize sex? And is that the phrase you think we should use, or should it be something broader – like prioritize sex and intimacy? And why is it important? Or is it important? On the flip side, what doesn't it mean to prioritize sex? It's fairly typical for sex to become less of a priority as a couple moves beyond the early years of marriage. When that happens, what's typically going on? What are some of the things that get in the way of making sex a priority? What might "making sex a priority" look like in the marriages of busy wives and moms? And what are some of the things they can do to make that a reality in their lives and marriages? Sponsor Click Here to Learn More! Click here to visit Faithful Counseling (now Better Help) and learn about getting matched to an licensed online counselor who is also a practicing Christian. From the Bible What does God have to say about prioritizing sex? "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." Mark 10:7-9 Resources You Deserve a Great Sex Life Too - CalmHealthySexy 3 Words that Can Improve Your Sex Life - CalmHealthySexy Picking Your Priorities (Sex Should Be One of Them) | Hot, Holy & Humorous Is the Spark Gone from Your Sex Life? Honeycomb & Spice Are You in the Mood for Sex? The Forgiven Wife Penis sleeve (affiliate link)

For many years, there were very few resources for Christians who wanted to learn how to have a healthy sex life. Now Christians can find more and more books, courses, and videos to help them. It's great to have choices, but sometimes it's hard to know whether or not a particular resource is good. Today we're joined by Phylicia Masonheimer. She encourages women to discern God's truth and live out their faith boldly in every area of their lives—including the bedroom. We talk about why it's difficult to discern which resources are biblical and helpful, what to consider when evaluating a resource, and whether to use a secular resource and then share a few recommendations. Sponsor Click here to learn more about Revival AI's investment opportunity. From the Bible Ephesians 5 NIV What does God have to say about evaluating resources? The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding. To him belongs eternal praise. – Psalm 111:10 In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil. – Hebrews 5:12-14 See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ. – Colossians 2:8 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. – James 1:5 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness. – James 3:17-18 Teach me, Lord, the way of your decrees, that I may follow it to the end. Give me understanding, so that I may keep your law and obey it with all my heart. Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight. Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain. Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word. – Psalm 119:33-37 Resources Phylicia Masonheimer's website Verity Podcast with Phylicia Masonheimer Sexuality | Phylicia Masonheimer How to Read a Marriage Book | Hot, Holy & Humorous Are You in an Abusive or Destructive Marriage? | Hot, Holy & Humorous The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman & Nan Silver The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, & Stonewalling | The Gottman Institute Leslie Vernick ministry The Emotionally Destructive Marriage: How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope by Leslie Vernick Christian Cosmo: The Sex Talk You Never Had by Phylicia Masonheimer Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations about Sex for Married Couples by J. Parker Virgin Bride Guidebook: Wedding Night Answers by Bonny Logsdon Burns Unlock Your Libido: 52-Week Sex Drive Transformation by Bonny Logsdon Burns Awaken Love: The Truth About Sex that will Transform Your Marriage by Ruth Buezis The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment by Clifford & Joyce Penner Enjoy!: The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women by Joyce & Clifford Penner Authentic Intimacy – Juli Slattery ministry Rethinking Sexuality: God's Design and Why It Matters by Juli Slattery Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage by Ed & Gaye Wheat Visit our website: forchristianwives.com

About this episode The marriage relationship overall can impact a wife's sexual interest. Having a good marriage with intimacy in many areas can make it easier to want and enjoy sex. In this episode, we're going to talk about things you can do in the area of nonsexual intimacy that can have a positive impact on your sex life. Sponsor Click here to learn more about Revival AI's investment opportunity From the Bible What does God have to say about improving your marital relationship? Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. – Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Resources Praying Together for Your Marriage | Hot, Holy & Humorous Could You Use Some Marriage Humor? | Hot, Holy & Humorous FANOS – A Couples Sharing Exercise Couples Quiz – The 5 Love Languages® Episode 101: Enjoying Sex, with Joyce Penner – Sex Chat for Christian Wives Wives, Your Voice Matters (in the Bedroom & Beyond) | Hot, Holy & Humorous Give Him the Gift of Happiness | Hot, Holy & Humorous 25 Ways to Have Fun with Your Spouse – CalmHealthySexy How to Add Some Adventure to Your Marriage – CalmHealthySexy Nurture Your Nonsexual Intimacy – The Forgiven Wife Tending the Garden – The Forgiven Wife Respect Dare archives – The Forgiven Wife Faithful Counseling (now Better Help) – online counseling (affiliate link)

In this episode, we answer a few of your questions. "What are other ways to relax and enjoy my husband guilt free?" "I don't like feeling like it's just sex.... Do I have a block? Was I wrong to be upset? How do I get myself [past] feeling like it's cold and not love?" "I was hoping you could share some wisdom of what it's like moving in with your husband for the first time… what to expect…how to talk to one another about our soon to be sex life, and tips for a soon to be pastor's wife." "What are some positive resources on sex and marriage that are geared toward men? I have been able to find good resources for myself, but my fiancé has not." If you want to submit a question for a future episode, click on Ask a Question in the menu on our website and submit your query. Sponsor Click to learn more about Revival AI. Also sponsored by Christian Friendly Sex Positions Deck of Cards. From the Bible "All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, 'God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.'" 1 Peter 5:5 (NIV) "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ." Ephesians 5:21 (NIV) Resources Mindfulness & Meditation During Sex | Hot, Holy & Humorous The Gift of Sex by Clifford & Joyce Penner Enjoy!: The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women by Joyce Penner Passion Pursuit: What Kind of Love Are You Making? by Linda Dillow & Juli Slattery Intimacy Ignited: Discover the Fun and Freedom of God-Centered Sex by Joseph & Linda Dillow and Peter & Lorraine Pintus Unlock Your Libido: 52-Week Sex Drive Transformation by Bonny Logsdon Burns Intimacy Revealed by J. Parker Do You Pray for Your Sex Life? | Hot, Holy & Humorous A Prayer for Your Sexual Intimacy | Hot, Holy & Humorous Wives, Your Voice Matters (in the Bedroom & Beyond) | Hot, Holy & Humorous The Small Stuff Can Drive You Crazy | Hot, Holy & Humorous How Much Should You Learn about Sex before the Wedding Night? | Hot, Holy & Humorous (guest post from Heather & Eric Viets) What I Wish I'd Known Before the Wedding Night | Hot, Holy & Humorous Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations about Sex for Married Couples by J. Parker Virgin Bride Guidebook: Wedding Night Answers by Bonny Logsdon Burns Episode 93: Newlywed Tips, with Ngina Otiende Knowing Her Sexually (KHS) Ministry (w/Chris Taylor & J. Parker) The Generous Husband | Daily rants on being a better husband (w/Paul Byerly) The Married Guy's Guide to Great Sex by Clifford Penner Awaken Love Men's Edition - Awaken-Love Java with Juli podcast (w/Juli Slattery) Understanding Her Sex Drive - Webinar Replay - Sex Chat for Christian Wives Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing by Jay Stringer Visit our website: forchristianwives.com

Take the Survey As mentioned in the episode, Chris Taylor of Honeycomb & Spice is doing a survey on chronic illness and sex. We'd appreciate you taking the survey, so that she can address this subject well. Click the link: https://tinyurl.com/chronic-survey Or scan the QR code: About the Episode How often should a married couple have sex? You might think this would be an easy question to answer, but we think it's going to take a whole episode. How do seasons of life affect the frequency of lovemaking, and what range of frequency do you think is appropriate for each season? What other factors can affect frequency? What does research say about consistent sexual intimacy? How should you and your husband negotiate frequency? Sponsor Share the Soap has put together a special treat box especially for listeners of Sex Chat for Christian Wives. Click on the image above to learn more—and use coupon code chat21 for an extra bath soap jewel! Click here to get the free recipe for a personal lubricant/sensual massage oil. From the Bible What does God have to say about the frequency of sex? Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. - 1 Corinthians 7:5 If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married. - Deuteronomy 24:5 Resources Gaslighting - Partner Hope Deconstructing Gaslighting with Sarah Morales DARVO (a type of gaslighting) The 10,000-hour rule - original research, concept popularized in Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell (though J recommends The Talent Code by Daniel Coyle for a more thorough treatment), and research-based challenges to the 10,000-hour rule Episode 95: How Does Depression Affect Sex? Stop Hooking Up In Your Marriage | Shaunti Feldhahn - guest post by Juli Slattery Episode 101: Enjoying Sex, with Joyce Penner More Sex Makes Us Happy, But Once A Week May Be Enough : Shots - Health News : NPR 10 Surprising Health Benefits of Sex (webmd.com) Here's How Much Sex Couples Are Having Per Week (theknot.com) How Often Should You Have Sex? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Vitamin E suppositories Your Husband's Libido May Not Be What You Think - The Forgiven Wife Unlock Your Libido by Bonny Logsdon Burns Virgin Bride Guidebook by Bonny Logsdon Burns Q&A with J: Should A Higher Drive Spouse Lower Their Expectations? | Hot, Holy & Humorous 8 Ways to Stay Intimate Even When Life Gets in the Way of Sex - The Forgiven Wife affiliate links included Click Here to Check Out the Bundle! GREAT VALUE. Visit Our Website: forchristianwives.com