Now That We're A Family

What are the benefits of courting and how to talk to family members who think your child should be allowed to date? We had a 10 month courtship (our first time around) and then a typical dating relationship later. We would not necessarily recommend courting, or at least the way we did it. We don’t want the dating model for our children though either. It’s not to say that a lot of harm can be avoided, but we think it can be so uptight and intense. It can also lead to not developing a great friendship or ground level relationship before you dive into marriage. Getting alone to have one-on-one raw, meaty conversations is a healthy part to getting to know someone before deciding to spend the rest of your life with them. We think it’s more helpful for the guy and girl to explore a relationship together in terms of hanging out a couple times together, asking people who know them questions, asking each other questions, seeing if your personalities connect, seeing if you have fun together, and ultimately, seeing if you want to make this work in the infancy of the relationship. After you’ve done that and you think this person is worth fighting for, then bring them into the family and start putting them through the paces. I think when you put them through the paces before both people are even sure they want to pursue the relationship, it can just really muddle the emotion and be very stressful on everyone involved. If you want to be married to someone of integrity, someone who protects, cherishes and is faithful and loyal to you, you would want there to be this open line of exhortation and discernment from the parents as soon as possible. We think courtship can be a beautiful thing, if you realize as the parent that you are the counselor and your adult child needs to make their own decisions and come to you and you don’t try to control the situation. We want to raise our children in a way that they value our opinion and discernment and be able to trust them, trust their standards and desires for a relationship and marriage. To answer the second question, our parents would say, children don’t need to date. You date to get married. When our child is old enough, an adult and ready to get married, then that’s when they will date. When the time or person is right, then we would definitely encourage them to date. You also don’t need to answer to anyone how you parent your children. You answer to God. To sum it all up, we aren’t bitter at courting and don’t think dating is great. We are somewhere in the middle! :) - Looking for more Now That We're A Family resources? We got 'em! Website: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nowthatwereafamily/ OUR FAMILY MUSIC ACADEMY: https://www.voetbergmusicacademy.com Is your life just too complicated to ever feel peaceful? Check out Katie's: https://getitalldoneclub.com

Families are high above businesses and other outside ministries, but we can learn so much from how we apply ourselves to business and hopefully get convicted and come back to our home and want to put the structure and intentionality into our home and family. However, we don’t want to cheapen what marriage or family is by comparing it to a business. Obviously the covenant of marriage is something God ordained. There is a spiritual and holy element to it that a business will never be able to recreate. We’re doing this from the perspective that family and marriage are in a league of its own when it comes to importance and significance for what God has said about it. Each family, as a culture, will tend to value what the parents value. We’re training our kids with what we do with our time. Companies that run for generations often have had a generational view in mind when they started and the kids were able to take and make it even better, which is the prayer for our family.  Podcast Episode Referenced: 137: Why The Christian Family is Broken // Interview With Jeremy Pryor of Family Teams - https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/podcasts/now-that-we-re-a-family-10/episodes/2147645080 Looking for more Now That We're A Family resources? We got 'em! Website: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nowthatwereafamily/OUR FAMILY MUSIC ACADEMY: https://www.voetbergmusicacademy.com Is your life just too complicated to ever feel peaceful? Check out Katie's: https://getitalldoneclub.com

When a listener asked us, "What is something you've changed your mind about?," it got us thinking that we've changed our mind on a handful of issues and some were pretty big. Changing your mind is a part of growing, especially if the Lord is leading you a different way. The Lord has changed our hearts on a couple things: alcohol, birth control, Christmas, justification and eschatology. We were challenged through the years to go to Scripture, listen to others opinions and determine what we believe, as well as what we think is best for our family. Looking for more Now That We're A Family resources? We got 'em! Podcast Episodes Referenced: Episode 106: Young Christian Couple's Convictions on Family Planning and Birth Control: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/podcasts/now-that-we-re-a-family-10/episodes/2147567944 Episode 136: Why We Are Celebrating Christmas For The First Time: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/podcasts/now-that-we-re-a-family-10/episodes/2147640442 Website: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nowthatwereafamily/ OUR FAMILY MUSIC ACADEMY: https://www.voetbergmusicacademy.com Is your life just too complicated to ever feel peaceful? Check out Katie's: https://getitalldoneclub.com 

Check out everything Angie and her husband, Isaac, have going on with Be Courageous Ministry here: https://www.becourageousministry.org/  - Follow Angie On Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/courageous.mom/ - Listen To The Courageous Parenting Podcast Here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/courageous-parenting/id1447714806 - Check Out The Courageous Parenting Mentor Program Here: https://courageousparenting.com/  

Joe Stout and his wife, Elizabeth, have nine children ages 13 years to eight months old. They live on a farm with 500 goats and run a 90-year-old company that makes health supplements from goat milk. Joe received a Master’s of Science in Clinical Human Nutrition from the University of Bridgeport and a Bachelor’s of Science in Human Nutrition and Food Science from Washington State University. Along with running the farm, He has engaged in graduate studies of Sustainable Food Systems at Green Mountain College and is certified in Permaculture Design.  Joe's Personal Website: https://joestout.org/ Mt Capra Website: https://mtcapra.com/ Listen To Joe's Music Here: https://joestout.bandcamp.com/  Stay up to date on everything we are doing at Now That We're A Family by subscribing to our weekly newsletter here: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/top-5-tuesday-newletter  

Lisa lives in a 1860s farmhouse with her husband and seven children. Welcome to Farmhouse on Boone! A place where Lisa passionately shares her scratch recipes, handmade projects, farmhouse restoration and her family’s simple life.  Visit Lisa's Website Here: https://www.farmhouseonboone.com/ Listen To Lisa's Podcast Here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/simple-farmhouse-life/id1494284839 Check Out Here Awesome YouTube Channel Here: https://www.youtube.com/c/FarmhouseonBoone Follow Her On Instagram Here: https://www.instagram.com/farmhouseonboone/  

Here it is! The coupon code for music lessons. Use Coupon Code PODCASTVMA for 10% off every month you are enrolled. Check out our piano, guitar, fiddle, mandolin, and ukulele lessons here: https://www.voetbergmusicacademy.com/ Here is the link to Katie's health website: https://www.nowthatimamotherhealth.com/  Here is a link to the IG Stories about Picky Toddlers: https://www.instagram.com/stories/highlights/18129910954139293/  If you would like to receive our weekly newsletter, Top Five Tuesday, then you can sign up for that here: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/top-5-tuesday-newletter  

Against all odds we've made it through 4 years of doing the podcast without talking about Halloween. But we cracked. We caved. We succumbed. Succame? . . .The pressure got to us and we could not resist taking advantage of this seasonal opportunity to share our personal opinions and convictions on a polarizing holiday. Neither Katie or I grew up celebrating Halloween so we never needed to have a sit down conversation to go over the pros and cons and come to our own decision about Halloween. It was just never going to be a part of our home. But as our children have grown and become more curious about this autumn holiday, Katie and I have needed to crystallize then articulate our thoughts on the topic. We recon that if we can tell Leon, Lucy, Louis, and Lawrence our perspective on Halloween then we should be able to tell you guys on the podcast.  If you want to watch Katie's FREE WEBINAR then you can do that very thing here: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/peacefully-productive-home-masterclass If you have not yet signed-up for my weekly newsletter, Top Five Tuesday, you can do that thing here: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/top-5-tuesday-newletter  

A book titled "How To Leave And Cleave" would certainly get my attention and the author, my money. Or the publisher would get the money . . .who pays the agent? Idk. All I know is that starting a life and a home together as a married couple seems to go a little deeper than bank accounts and tax benefits. No, we are not going to break down the mystery of how "two becoming one" works. But we are going to share our experience in both leaving families that have strong, distinct, and in some ways polarizing cultures and creating our own home and culture. We have the great fortune of coming from godly families with countless admirable traits. There is SO MUCH we want to emulate from our experiences growing up in big families. But more often than not, newly weds and young parents would prefer if their new family looked nothing like what they experienced growing up. In either situation, the call to "leave and cleave" and form our own home remains. And I am still waiting to be convinced otherwise that a unified home with a clear mission is more powerful than any organization or individual or the death star.  The Bible Passage Katie was trying to remember: 1st Kings 12:8  "But he forsook the counsel of the old men, which they had given him, and consulted with the young men that were grown up with him, and which stood before him" It would mean so much to us if you took the time to leave our podcast a rating or a review. You can usually do it by scrolling to the bottom of your player then following the prompts.  Be sure to subscribe to Top Five Tuesday so you can get specials offers and EXCLUSIVE content. Sign up here: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/site/about     

Here's Where You Subscribe To Top Five Tuesday(where you can get the link to our sabbath video) https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com/site/about  - Looking for more Now That We're A Family resources? We got 'em! Website: https://www.nowthatwereafamily.com  - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nowthatwereafamily/  - OUR FAMILY MUSIC ACADEMY: https://www.voetbergmusicacademy.com - Is your life just too complicated to ever feel peaceful? Check out Katie's: https://getitalldoneclub.com