My Momma Told Me

Y'all better make some noise. The legend, Bruce Bruce, graced us with his presence to ask the most important questions of the day. Was Mary Magdalene fine? Is Jack Black the white E-40? CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com JOIN OUR PATREON FOR MORE CONSPIRACIES  https://www.patreon.com/mymommatoldme LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Are dinosaurs real? Langston and David sit down with comedic improviser Cedric Yarbrough (Clint Eastwood's Juror #2, out Nov. 1! ) about his days being raised as a Jehovah's Witness in Minnesota and many "worldly" ideas he was taught not to believe in, including the existence of dinosaurs. Langston surprises both David and Cedric with his research, and they discuss various topics like porn parodies of Reno 911 and getting kicked out of the BET awards after party. CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com JOIN OUR PATREON FOR MORE CONSPIRACIES  https://www.patreon.com/mymommatoldme LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Actor Brett Gray (On My Block, I'm a Virgo, and The Chi) drops by to prove once and for all that robots are racist and no technology is safe. Cellphones, hand dryers, and of course AI...Gray doesn't just ask if they're racist; he wants to know how racist. Are they colorist, too? Langston and David recount the Disney classic sports movies, shout out to Cool Runnings, and beg the little mommas to stop threatening to take their microphones away. Plus, a caller wonders if Ghost Writer was a runaway slave who died a grisly death.  CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com JOIN OUR PATREON FOR MORE CONSPIRACIES  https://www.patreon.com/mymommatoldme LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Langston and David are joined by former UCLA basketball player, NBA Twitter meme king, and podcast host Josiah Johnson. They talk about the 1985 first official draft lottery. Was it rigged or not? And we learn that the 2009 Western Conference Finals were the greatest time of David’s life. The Nuggets were fun during that time, Barack Obama was president, and Michael Jackson just passed: the holy trinity for David's comedy career. Plus, a hot take, they definitely stole some of Jackie Chan's moves for Tom Cruise in Mission: Impossible.  SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LEAVE US A VOICE MESSAGE AT 844-LIL-MOMS (844-545-6667) LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Legendary stand-up comedian Ali Siddiq arrives with a first hand lesson on the history of hip-hop, asking the most important questions like: why is the south still getting disrespected, why haven't we seen Tyreese Gibson with hair, when will the US government suspend Juvenille's taxes and show that man some appreciation for his services? Plus, is fighting embarrassing? Why do parents want to talk through the spanking? Whose COVID was most valid? And a caller wonders if the devil made women.  CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com JOIN OUR PATREON FOR MORE CONSPIRACIES  https://www.patreon.com/mymommatoldme LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The hilarious Dulce Sloan returns to the pod and brings the boiling, flavorless conspiracy theory that white people can't cook. That crockpot lifestyle is just begging for salmonella soup. Langston and David exalt the brilliance of mathematician Terrance Howard, clown Dulce for trying to pick up a guy in the hallway, and one brave caller asks the question we've all been asking, "What color was Michael Jackson's penis?"  CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com JOIN OUR PATREON FOR MORE CONSPIRACIES  https://www.patreon.com/mymommatoldme LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Langston and David open up with updates: Gborie's latest purchase, Mexican markets selling African goods, Langston disowning his last name...the episode zigs and zags, just keep up Lil' Mommas! They make a declarative statement that sheds light on the spectacle/illness that has fallen on America: Love Island. Lastly, the guys answer listener voicemails about burnt hotdogs, hairy nether regions, ICE, and light-to-dark skin gradient scale. SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LEAVE US A VOICE MESSAGE AT 844-LIL-MOMS (844-545-6667) LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Gary Anthony Williams, the voice of Uncle Ruckus dooesn't believe in conspiracy theories, but he does believe in witches. In this episode, he discusses the connection between rappers and the pink mafia, what it's like to have dinner with Erykah Badu, the one piece of advice he got from Billy Dee Williams, and his forthcoming novel 'What I Learned Drinking with White Women'. David and Langston share their fear of running out of sex. More white women should sing like they're running out of breath. Shout out, Alanis Morissette.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Langston and David discuss whether white people listen to flat back music or do Black people just like the music they don’t like? They also answer a voicemail about how unattractive white women are dangerous. SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LEAVE US A VOICE MESSAGE AT 844-LIL-MOMS (844-545-6667) LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1wMf8iYG-imuTwqje2PNg TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@mymommatoldmepod?lang=en MY MOMMA TOLD ME MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Visit https://mymommatoldme.merchtable.com/ FOLLOW LANGSTON KERMAN ON ALL PLATFORMS: @langstonkerman FOLLOW DAVID GBORIE ON INSTAGRAM: @coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is throwing away a plastic bag anti-Black? How many platic's bag worth of plastic bags should a person keep in their home? Comedian Clark Jones guides us on a toray into the shady side of porn sites with his conspiracy that PornHub takes photos of users while they scroll. Is there a database of o-faces? Is Fat Joe a better podcaster than he is a rapper? We ponder these deep questions, plus Langston gives us a proper definition of gooning, and David regales us with his harrowing tales on BART. In this house, we respect our laptops. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.