Ask Christopher West

How can my wife and I grow in intimacy during periods of abstinence? What is the difference between Jewish marriage and Catholic marriage? Why does Jesus call God "Father" if God is neither male nor female? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

How can I lead my partner deeper in the faith when her faith is already deeper than my own? What is the Catholic Church's teaching on circumcision? Do you have any advice for ministering to men who struggle with sexual sin? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! More on the meaning of Circumcision If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Does sexual union in our fallen world inherently "defile" the man and the woman? How do I balance longing for eternity and cherishing the things of this world? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

I'm afraid my wife feels that my love is conditional based on her physical appearance. . . what should I do? What happens to celibate's sexual desires? Why are marriage and holy orders sacraments but not religious life for sisters, brothers, and consecrated singles? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! Order your copy of God Is Beauty by Karol Wojtyla If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

My son attends Oxford Highschool where there was a recent shooting – he is unharmed but struggling to process the horrors of what happened. Do you have any advice? Believing that Catholicism is "the ultimate religion" makes me uncomfortable. How can we be sure that Catholicism is the correct interpretation of Christ's life? Do you have a list of good movies? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: Get a FREE e-book from Christopher West Theology of the Body at the Movies View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! Professor Destroys Relativism in 4 Minutes! If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Are Adam and Eve saints? When does desiring a romantic relationship become lustful, especially when using dating apps? What do you recommend for the healing and increase of desire for marital intimacy? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Patron Question: Are Adam and Eve saints? What about Cain, Abel, and Seth? If they are saints, was their gaining death in the garden merely the loss of the supernatural gift of immortality, or also a rupture in their relationship with God they later had to repent of to mend their relationship with God so they could die in his grace? Question 2: Dear Christopher and Wendy, I, a 25-year-old male, ended a long-term relationship just over a year ago and a significant reason was my former girlfriend's intent on using contraception in marriage. Shortly after, I came to this podcast for strength, education, and support and I’m confident in that decision. Thank you for your work and passionate responses to all of us listeners. My question comes about dating apps. In short, do you think it's a good idea? Long version, I recently downloaded a dating app after being against them for so long, and it's the first time it's lasted on my phone for more than 24 hours. I am ready to date again, and I want to find a future spouse. But when does it become lustful in wanting a girlfriend? I find myself giving in to temptation, and sometimes the desire of having a new relationship and the experiences that come with that seem lustful to me. Thanks for your thoughts on this. Qestion 3: Christopher and Wendy, we love you! God bless you guys with a most special blessing. You guys have been a great blessing in our life and in our marriage. My wife and I have been married for 4 years. We feel we have a very strong marriage. We’re happy, strong in our Catholic faith, raising 3 kids together. We want to grow in all areas continually but the one area we feel that is lacking is "her intimacy." She, my wife, wants her sexual desire towards me to be stronger and wants to be more loving during sex. We have revealed everything to each other about our past sexual experiences because we wanted to hold nothing back from each other before we got married. (When I heard you say this on the podcast I was so glad to hear that I did the right thing to expose my past self). Her first sexual experience was not a good one. She was also 14 at the time and there were other sexual partners after that also. She says the times she experienced sexual desire was at the beginning of a relationship with someone new. I feel that in our marriage she “does it to please me." We’ve been reading Theology of the Body and listening to your podcasts. I long for her intimacy and more of her presence during our love making. We talk about it together rather often now and she is open to ways to help or resolve whatever the issue may be. Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! Check out the John Paul II Healing Center Be Restored: Healing Our Sexual Wounds through Jesus’ Merciful Love by Dr. Bob Schuchts Naked Surrender: Coming Home to Our True Sexuality by Andrew Comiskey If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Do you have any encouragement for bringing Theology of the Body to the Anglican Church? How should I respond, as a teacher, to one of my highschool girls who thinks she is a boy? What is the Catholic view on arranged marriages? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Patron Question: Hello Christopher and Wendy! First I would like to say thank you and bless you for your wisdom and vulnerable honesty that you share on the podcast. I pray for you both and for the Institute for continued blessing and for protection from the enemy who would want to trip up your good work. I like to listen to episodes of ACW on a bike ride out in the country side here in the north of England or on nice long walk with the dog. I want you to know that the way you articulate Theology of the Body is such a blessing to me. It’s getting into my bones. It’s also getting into my PhD thesis. My research on mystagogy in the early church and listening to you guys express again and again how God wants to unite with us and how deeply that’s written into the order of our bodies is truly helping me to understand the Church Fathers and to write what I need to say in my own work. I’m an anglican and I’m married to a wonderful, faithful man who has recently bee ordained in the Church of England. We both are drawn towards Theology of the Body and feel like it articulates the precious truth about our humanity, sex and gender, and our calling to union with God. I think the Anglican Church is in desperate need of this theology and across the western world, our denomination is, in my opinion, floundering catastrophically in our understanding of sexuality and gender. Though we’ve both felt drawn towards the Catholic tradition and also the Orthodox tradition, throughout our walk with the Lord my husband has felt called to the Anglican Church and to the priesthood in it. And, I’m called to be his wife. Do you have any words of encouragement or exhortation for us who want to be faithful and forthright and bring the healing truth of God in a context that often feels like a house on fire? Question 2: Hello Christopher and Wendy. I thank you for these podcasts. I don’t know why I was always interested in the way the Church sees sexuality. As a teenager, I always wanted to explain to my friends why it was important to wait until marriage for sexual relationships but I didn’t have any arguments or knowledge. Now, I understand a lot of things and I see that the most important is the love and mercy God has for us. I don’t know if I can help others, but in the mean time, I’ve discovered this is helping me a lot. But here’s my question: I’m a high school teacher. I have a 17-year-old student. Her name is Anna, but she says she wants to become a man. In the school, she wants to be “called like a boy” and she is really serious about it. She says her family doesn’t agree with this idea. She feels they don’t understand her. I think I’m the only teacher that doesn’t want to call and treat her like a boy. Some teachers think we don’t have to say “she feels like a boy.” They think she actually is a boy in a girl’s body; she is a he, and all this gender ideology. They really think they’re helping her. I think she suffers and she feels hurt and she doesn’t really know what she wants. I don’t know how to help her or how to talk to her without her feeling rejected. I like what you always say, “become what you are,” but in today’s world, this may mean an other thing. What would you do in this situation? Qestion 3: What is the Catholic view on arranged marriages, assuming free will and consent of both parties? This has been the norm for marriages throughout history, including in the Bible itself, and still common in many eastern cultures. And one could argue that marriages focused on "romantic love" is a modern phenomena. Does the implicit transactional aspect of such an arrangement make it sinful? Does it make the union less a gift of self, since the couple may not have grown in love yet? Or is romantic love not necessary for a holy marriage, and it's precisely therefore it becomes a true gift of self? Surely, since it's been the norm through history, the Catholic church must have blessed such unions? Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! Good News About Sex & Marriage by Christopher West When Harry Became Sally: Responding to the Transgender Moment by Ryan T. Anderson Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters by Abigail Shrier If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

For some reason, my wife alwasy feels depressed on Sundays. . . any advice? Is masturbation permissible to obtain a semen sample for medical testing? How do I overcome lustful thoughts in marriage? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Patron Question: I can't thank you enough for this podcast and the work you do with TOB Institute. Supporting you as a patron, the only organization my wife and I have ever supported in this way, was the easiest decision we've made financially. We have already made plans to attend the TOB I course/retreat in person together in the summer of 2022. My question: For some reason, on Sundays, my wife and I get this depressed feeling, like we should be doing something besides just Mass, and the only option we can think of is to clean the house and get ready for another crazy week with our four kids. Just last Sunday, I remembered what you said about pursuing good eros, so I turned on music I loved, danced with my kids, and seemed to have been lifted from that feeling, but my wife still felt "depressed." I tried to tell her about "good eros" and think of something she loves to do, but she didn't understand it nor could she think of something to do. Our youngest is 7-months-old and takes a lot of her time and energy. My response is usually to take her on a date, which helps, but I feel there should be more she can do for her. What kind of advice can you give to my wife and me who regularly experience this "depressed" feeling, specifically on Sundays. And does the pursuit of good eros play a role here? Question 2: Hi Christopher and Wendy! We're engaged and very soon to be united in the Holy Matrimony. We feel very fortunate to have learned of the great gift of Theology of the Body through your presentations in both Denmark and Brazil. We thank God for your life and your marriage, and pray for more lives to be touched by this truth. About our question: Recently we discovered a medical condition that can be a cause of male sterility. To study it properly the doctors asked for a semen test. We know how the sample is obtained for this test. We want to know in this case, if The Church allows this. We would be very happy to welcome children in our marriage, but also, don't want to go against God's plan for our lives and our bodies. Qestion 3: I have a question about lustful thoughts within marriage. I am 19 years old and right now I am dating. My boyfriend and I are waiting for marriage in order to be faithful to the Lord, and although this is hard, it isn't as hard as battling lustful thoughts. In this stage of life I push these thoughts away and focus on better things rather than lusting, but I cannot help but wonder, how does this work once you are married? With memories of past sexual encounters and fantasies for the future it seems like this is something that would cross a married couples mind. I always thought that it was okay to think about these kinds of things when you were married, but I want to know for sure. Would this be considered a sin within the context of marriage, or is it okay? Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: Check out Restore the Glory Podcast and listen to Episode 42 and Episode 43 featuring Christopher West. Saint Paul VI Institute The Cantata of Love: A Verse by Verse Reading of the Song of Songs View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

What is the morality of embryo adoption? How do you overcome sexual sin in a dating relationship? Why does God permit the blessing of chidren to come from sinful acts? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Patron Question: Hi Christopher! Thank you so much for the work you do. As a young, Protestant, mother-of-two, I've learned so much from the resources you provide. It has deepened my faith as I have come to a better understanding of how I, as a Christian, am to live both body and soul together. My husband and I are looking for clarity in how to approach embryo adoption. We've noticed in our circles a trend in which a wife will feel passionately about embryo adoption and desire to help the babies that have been frozen as the result of IVF, but their husbands are not on board. Such has been our own case. My initial thought was that embryo adoption can be a way to alleviate the suffering that IVF has caused and since it is an adoption, the baby placed in the womb already belongs to the adoptive parents. My husband views this similarly to surrogacy since it separates pregnancy from the sexual act. It seems that the discomfort he and other men share is the idea that their wife would be pregnant with someone else's child. We have tried more than once to find succinct justification for embryo adoption that doesn't simplify it to an "ends justifies the means" argument, but have found nothing. It just grieves me to think that there might not be a solution for these babies that are in such a state of helplessness and abandonment. How can we think through this biblically? Question 2: Thank you for the light you have shared through your work – I’ve been fundamentally changed by your work. I am having a lot of trouble practicing chastity with my boyfriend. Both of us keep repeating sexual sins and confessing and doing it over and over again. We know the gravity of what we are doing and we debrief every time to try and work harder and do better as we discern our possible marriage to one another. I am asking for practical advice on how to really avoid non-marital sex and how to renew in hope after confession. I am always moved and healed by God’s forgiveness but I feel a sense of despair and hopelessness in our continued failure to respect each other’s bodies. I would also like to know if you have any advice for those struggling to persevere in prayer in moments of temptation, and any advice for how to continue practicing chastity in a relationship after failing so many times. Qestion 3: I know that the sins we commit come with consequences. Almost every sin I can think of has a negative consequence, but when it comes to fornication (well, obviously sometimes the consequences can be negative in terms of AIDS and other STDs) but sometimes God’s will is to give the couple who engaged in fornication a child, which I believe is always a blessing no matter the circumstances in which the child was conceived. Why do you think God would intend this, to bless people with children while all other sins have negative consequences? I can’t think of any other sin that has the possibility of giving us a blessing. Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Can our desires reveal God's will for us? I was a sperm donor before my conversion: what should I do? Is it wrong to ask for physicaly affection when dating? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body. Get a copy of God Is Beauty, A Retreat on the Gospel and Art by Karoly Wojtyla/John Paul II. Available now for the first time in English. Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community! Patron Question: Hello, first I would like to say thank you for your podcast. Recently I asked the man I hope I will one day be married to a question. I asked if he could see us together in the future, raising children and living for God together. We’ve been together for 3 years. We started our relationship in a carnal way and have both grown more in the Catholic faith. His response was that he doesn’t know. He said he doesn’t know what God's will is for us and he doesn’t want to say if he can see us together. So my question is, can our desires show us God's will? Can God use what we want for good? Question 2: I was a sperm donor as a younger man before I came to faith, and now follow the Church's teaching on sexual ethics. The clinic where I made my donations still has some of my “material” left over in order to be able to provide fully-related siblings if any of the women who have already received my material wish for further children from the same father. It goes without saying I won't be providing any further material, and I'm strongly inclined to tell them to dispose of whatever remains. I haven’t done it yet because I feel awful that I'll potentially be creating further fractures in families already formed outside of God's will. Any advice or comments would be hugely appreciated. Qestion 3: If affection, especially in dating, is meant to be given only to affirm the goodness of the other and not for yourself, is it wrong when you are in need of comfort to ask for a hug or some other affection? Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com. Resources mentioned this week: There's still time to register! Join our Pilgrimage to Mexico City December 2-7, 2021. View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON! If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram. Discover the Theology of the Body Institute. If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening! Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals. Featuring music by Mike Mangione.