Restored: Helping Children of Divorce

In many places, we’re facing an epidemic of fatherlessnes. Fatherlessness not only leaves an invisible mark but it also shapes how you view yourself, how you handle your emotions, and how you love in relationships. So are fatherless children doomed?Not at all. In fact, Tommy shows how to compensate for what you didn’t receive from dad and how healing is within reach. In this episode, we also discuss:His dad’s spiral into mental illness, homelessness—and why Tommy hasn’t seen him in over a decadeThe hidden ways father hunger shows up in dating relationships, causing us to seek what we never received from the wrong peopleThe lies he carried for years: “I am alone” and “I have to earn love”—and the truth he found to break that gripIf you experienced any sort of fatherlessness, this episode is for you.Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your FaultGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidShare Your StoryShownotes

So many of us from divorced or dysfunctional families never learned how to deal with pain and suffering in a healthy way. As a result, we usually either numb the pain or get stuck in bitterness. But what if you could not only learn how to navigate pain in a healthy way, but actually draw meaning from your pain and emerge stronger? That’s what we discuss in this episode, plus:The shocking diagnosis Jack received at 11—and how it rewired his entire futureWhy suffering always pushes you into one of three paths (and how only one leads to freedom)The 3 ways to find meaning in suffering and the obstacles that prevent itIf you’re suffering, perhaps because of your parents’ divorce or the breakdown of your family, this episode is for you.Get Jack’s Course or FREE Class: RISE: Drawing Meaning from Suffering Through the Lens of St. John Paul II, Victor Frankl and JesusBook a FREE Mentorship Session with JackGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidGet Joey’s Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your FaultJocko Willink "GOOD" (Viral Video)Shownotes

When Brandy was only a few months old, her parents divorced due to her father’s alcoholism. From the outside, her story might seem like a “best case” scenario—she was raised by a courageous single mom and later a kind stepfather. But underneath it all, she carried wounds no one could see. She believed perfection was the path to love. She feared becoming like the very people who hurt her. One wound even stayed buried for 20 years. In this episode, we explore:The shocking memory that resurfaced in adulthood—and what it revealedWhy her marriage should’ve failed statistically—and how she and her husband beat the oddsAnd what her mom did right that every divorced parent needs to hearIf you've ever felt pressure to be perfect, feared repeating your parents’ marriage, or kept wounds hidden, this episode is for you.Get Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidGet the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your FaultEpisode 84: Angry at God? Why People from Broken Families Struggle Extra in Their Relationship with Him | Sr. Miriam James Heidland Episode 39: The Anatomy of a Wound & How to Heal | Dr. Bob Schuchts, PhDShownotes

What is attachment theory? How does your attachment style impact your relationships? As an expert in attachment theory, Kirsty Nolan joins us to discuss all of that, plus:The four attachment stylesWhat happens when you have a secure attachment early in childhood, but later experience a rupture because of trauma, like your parents’ divorceTips on resolving conflict, specifically how to repair after a ruptureIf you’re curious about attachment styles or just want a healthy relationship, this episode is for you.Listen to Kirsty’s podcast, Attachment Theory in ActionGet help from Kirsty’s organization, ChaddockGet the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your FaultGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidShownotes

What happens when you become your parents’ emotional confidant—their therapist—during a divorce? At first, it might feel like you’re helping. But eventually, it backfires and might even break you. That’s what happened to Cole. In this episode, we explore:How he went through his parents’ separation twice—and how each one affected him differentlyHow he’s slowly rebuilding family relationships after stepping away to healWhy even small decisions felt impossible—and how he learned to choose with confidenceIf you’ve ever acted as your parents’ therapist—or felt crushed by their divorce or the chaos at home—this episode is for you.Share Your StoryGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidWhy you should define your fears instead of your goals | Tim Ferriss | TED#036: Healthy Relationships Are Impossible Without BoundariesCelebrate Recovery CommunityShownotes

So many of us feel depleted and exhausted, yet we might not know why. This is especially true for those of us from divorced or broken families. Research shows that children of divorce typically have worse physical health and more emotional problems. But thankfully, that doesn’t have to be your story. Going from depleted to healthy on every level is not only doable—but simpler than you think, according to my guest.In this episode, we discuss:9 often-overlooked pillars of health that could be sabotaging your wellness.The top 4 areas of health where most people need to start. Quick and simple tips you probably haven’t heard to feel and be your best.If you’ve struggled with your health in any way or just desire to be healthier, this episode is for you.Enroll in Reform OnlineFor 10% off, use code: RESTORED10 (valid until June 15, 2025) Comment end  Visit ReformWellness.coGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidView Restored’s ResourcesShownotes

AJ had a normal life as a college student-athlete. But one night, a violent car accident left AJ paralyzed from the waist down. What started as 15 minutes of hell has transformed into what he calls “The best thing that’s happened to me.” In this episode, you’ll hear:The detailed story of the accident and the unexplainable emotions he experienced in the minutes after the accidentThe two things that helped him cope and beat feeling like a perpetual victimWhat AJ said to the driver of the vehicle and the miracles and transformations that have resulted from his injuryIf you’ve endured trauma, a horrible injury, or you’re just going through an intense season of suffering, this episode is for you.Follow AJ:InstagramTikTokYouTubeEmail: Ajoftherose@gmail.comGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidView Restored’s ResourcesShownotes

At the root of our culture’s many problems is the breakdown of marriages and families. My guest shares sobering statistics, such as that “there are 31% less marriages annually now than in the year 2000” and there are “65% less marriages now than in the year 1970.” He says this is hugely contributing to the loneliness crisis today. Thankfully, there is a cure, which we discuss in this episode, plus:How the lonelinest group of people at church aren’t the oldEncouragement for young people from broken families who fear love and marriageWhat a healthy relationship looks like and how to build it, including the 5 stages of healthy relationshipsIf you’ve been affected by the breakdown of marriages and families, this episode is for you.Buy JP’s Book: The Church's Strategic Move to Save Faith and Family in AmericaGet Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidView Restored’s ResourcesShownotes

Growing up, Dr. Gerry experienced deep turmoil at home. His father was abusive, and his parents’ marriage was full of conflict. When they eventually divorced, he felt like he lost both parents. Feeling alone, he became highly independent. Thankfully, he found healing, and today he helps others heal as a therapist. In this episode, we discuss:How Internal Family Systems (IFS) and “parts work” can help you heal emotional wounds and improve your relationships.The way our parts interact with our significant other—and how to avoid choosing a spouse from a wounded part of you.What a mother wound is and how it affects youHow movies like Inside Out, Encanto, and even Avengers’ movies illustrate “parts work” and the healing journey.If you have perhaps sustained a mother wound or want to heal using Internal Family Systems, this episode is for you.Get Dakota’s FREE Guide: The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to AvoidBuy Dr. Gerry’s Book: Litanies of the Heart: Relieving Post-Traumatic Stress and Calming Anxiety through Healing Our PartsView Dr. Gerry’s Team or schedule a FREE 15 min consultVisit Souls & HeartsView Restored’s ResourcesShownotes

So many of us from divorced or broken families fear repeating our parents' mistakes. If you want to avoid that, one of the keys is building virtue. But what is virtue? How do you build it? And what virtues might you acquire?My guest today wrote Superhabits, an amazing new book on virtue. He answers those questions, plus:How to override the unconscious bad habits we inherited in our familiesOne habit that could save your marriage before it starts and what virtues to look for in a potential spouseWhy virtue, not just therapy, is the key to healing family woundsIf you’re struggling with bad habits or you want to build good habits, this episode is for you.View Restored's ResourcesBuy Book Super Habits by Dr. Andrew AbelaGrow Virtue app Shownotes