Sex Birth Trauma with Kimberly Ann Johnson

In this episode, the third in the Santa Fe trilogy, Kimberly speaks with Ranier Amiel, an artist, bodyworker, and single mother who is restoring a century-old church in Truchas, New Mexico, and turning it into a home, studio, and eventually a space of community and sacred inquiry. Recorded inside the church itself, their conversation moves between the balance of motherhood and creativity, the grounding power of physical labor, and what it means to hunt for and make God after losing faith in the spiritual community you were raised in. Ranier shares her vulva portraiture work, including its two-year run inside an immersive theater project in Amsterdam, and the stark contrast she witnessed between American and Dutch women's relationships to their bodies. They discuss the trauma orientation as a cultural overcorrection that can become avoidant of self-expression, the obsession with self-definition versus actually embodying who you are, and the need for hierarchy, tradition, and compression alongside the essential self. The conversation closes with reflections on the layers between: body and soul, survival and art, the seen and the unseen. Bio Ranier Amiel is an artist, bodyworker, movement teacher, and painter based in Truchas, New Mexico, where she is restoring a century-old church into a home, studio, and community space. Born in Santa Fe and raised deeply inside a spiritual community, she has spent the last two decades on what she calls a path of hunting and making God—seeking the sacred through the body, art, and radical vulnerability. She is known for her vulva portraiture and witnessing work, which she has practiced for over twelve years, including a two-year collaboration with an immersive theater company in Amsterdam. A single mother to her son Ollie, Ranier's life and work sit at the intersection of art, motherhood, bodywork, and the creation of sacred space. She envisions the church as a place of deeper meaning, community inquiry, and a different perspective on spiritual truth—guided by a board of priestesses. What She Shares: – The wrestle of motherhood and creativity as a single parent – Restoring a century-old church in Truchas as her biggest art project – How physical labor, trenching, building, moving rock, became the most grounding thing she's ever done – Hunting and making God after spiritual disillusionment at 19 – Her vulva portraiture work and what it reveals beyond trauma – The night-and-day contrast between American and Dutch women's body relationships – A vision for the church as sacred community space led by a board of priestesses What You'll Hear: – Motherhood and creativity: the wrestle of being a full-time single mom and a wild artist – Defining for herself what a good mom looks like and what she's willing to let go of – The history of the church in Truchas and how she found it on Zillow – Desperation and audacity: taking on a property with no plumbing and no heat – How building her own home with her hands healed her nervous system – Being a white woman in a historically Hispano community and being welcomed – The church's journey from services to gallery to bedroom to future sacred space – Growing up in a spiritual community that fell apart and watching people cling harder to beliefs – What church means to her: hunting and making God, creating sacred space – Removing the patriarchy from people's bodies through bodywork, movement, and painting – The vulva witnessing work: reclamation paintings, celebration paintings, and touching the place beyond the trauma – Two years of live witnessing inside an immersive theater project in Amsterdam – American versus Dutch women: puritanical repression versus healthy embodiment – Kimberly's reflections on writing Erotic Seasons and holding both wounding and alchemical power – The trauma orientation as avoidance of self-expression and a block to maturation – Watching her teenage son self-diagnose and the cultural swing from denial to over-identification – The geranium and the jungle plant: helping people find the conditions they need to thrive – Uniqueness tangled with individualism and the obsession with self-definition – The loss of hierarchy, tradition, and roles—and why compression helps us find essence – The body as the physical form of the soul, not a separate sack of flesh – The layers between as that which actually makes everything separate and not – Kimberly on occupying a between space in the culture and cultivating trustworthiness over customer satisfaction Resources Location: Truchas, New Mexico Website: https://ranieramiel.com/ IG: @ranieramiel

In this episode, Kimberly speaks with Dr. Chanti Tacoronte-Perez, an artist, educator, and depth psychologist based in Santa Fe, New Mexico, and the designer of the cover of Kimberly's upcoming book Erotic Seasons. Part of Kimberly's Santa Fe trilogy, this conversation explores what it means to teach and live emergently: responding to what's present rather than what's planned. Chanti shares her doctoral work on the wound of homelandlessness as a Cuban American, and how she developed a practice of creating and living with the image of one's wound as a daily, evolving relationship rather than something to fix or overcome. They discuss the difference between revisiting and rumination, the ancient link between art and therapy, and why images hold meaning differently than words; allowing wounds to keep shifting rather than becoming rigid stories. The conversation also touches on the Cuban concept of resolver, what it takes to be a student of one's own creative impulse, and how imperfection and planned spontaneity become doorways to aliveness. Bio Dr. Chanti Tacoronte-Perez is a Cuban-American artist-author, ritualist, and non-clinical depth psychologist. She believes that images speak a profound language; her life's work is a translator of the unseen and an advocate for the imaginal. She holds two master's degrees in Engaged Humanities and Depth Psychology from Pacifica Graduate Institute. In 2023 she completed her doctoral dissertation Navegando Liminal: Rituals to Translate the Image of the Wound. Her work and teaching follows and welcomes, imagination, creativity, dreaming, and deep rest. She teaches workshops, and collaborative training focused on creativity, yantra painting, dreaming, intuitive movement, myth, restorative yoga, and yoga nidra. Her passion and aim are to inspire all to rediscover their creative self by weaving the blessings with the wounds while honoring the land and ancestors. Dr. Chanti also works individually with clients using a transdisciplinary approach through creative therapeutics. Learn more. What She Shares: – Chanti's doctoral work on the wound of homelandlessness – The practice of creating and living with the image of one's wound – How emergence is like an emergency—the urgency of being present – The toolbox of an emergent teacher: listening, trust, and tolerance for tension – Why images hold meaning differently than words – The Cuban concept of resolver—figuring things out with what you have – How she navigated a PhD program as an image-based thinker – The link between art and therapy as the oldest form of alchemy What You'll Hear: – What emergent teaching actually requires: listening, trust, and a good ear for the pulse of the space – The tension of being the leader who says "I don't know" – Chanti's wound of homelandlessness: ni de aquí, ni de allá – Growing up being told "you belong over there"—and arriving in Cuba as a foreigner – Creating the image of the wound and living with it as an altar – The word estúpida on the image—and reclaiming what was once shame – Pursuing a PhD in Jungian Archetypal Studies as an image-based thinker – The project-based dissertation: two books, one of words and one of images – Wound and blessing: the etymology of bless as bleed in French and Old English – The difference between revisiting a wound and ruminating on it – How fixed meaning stops a wound from continuing to grow and change – Choiceless choice: when creative impulses announce themselves – The incubation period—how long to sit with a bubbling before it overflows – Art as something that overflows from you and becomes something else – Kimberly's experience writing her book with a co-editor through word games and play – Exhaustion, rest culture, and the shadow side of Yin – Creativity as living in the third space between social and sympathetic nervous systems – Working with dreams through images and movement – Mutual seed planting: how flamenco and imagery crossed between them – Imperfection as doorway: planned spontaneity, blindfolds, dice, and letting things fall – The layers between words and images, cultures, and belonging Resources Website: https://www.yantrawisdom.com/ Kimberly's Next Course: https://kimberlyannjohnson.com/STANDUP/

In this episode, Kimberly speaks with Jaye Marolla, a bodyworker, martial artist, Qigong teacher, and founder of The Body Innate and the Yin Dojo in Santa Fe, New Mexico. They explore the integration of martial arts, bodywork, and Qigong as a path of healing and sovereignty, and what Jaye calls "yin warriorship:" a reclamation of the warrior archetype rooted in surrender, Eros, and facing one's own mortality rather than competition or heroism. They discuss how Jaye came to open her home as a dojo, the ancient tradition of merging practice space with living space, and the energetic responsibility that requires. The conversation moves through the role of Eros and sexuality in training spaces, the difference between safety and emergence, the trauma frame versus a vitality frame, and what it means to lead atmospheres rather than follow scripts. They also explore queerness as a state of questioning, the tension between sovereignty and individualism, and the concept of couples dojos as somatic spaces for partnership. Bio Jaye Marolla is a bodyworker, martial artist, and Qigong practitioner based in Santa Fe, New Mexico, where she runs the Yin Dojo. She is the founder of The Body Innate and has trained extensively in multiple martial arts traditions including Aikido and Jiu Jitsu, as well as Thai bodywork, which she studied for three years with a master teacher in Thailand. A former Division 1 basketball player, Jaye integrates decades of physical training with Taoist philosophy, somatic practice, and community-based teaching. Her work sits at the intersection of yin warriorship, Eros, and embodied leadership, and she teaches martial arts, Qigong, bodywork, and leadership through emergent, atmosphere-based practice. She also leads couples dojos and collaborates with practitioners including Stephen Jackson on retreats exploring death, embodiment, and communal practice. What She Shares: – How the Yin Dojo came to be in her home in Santa Fe – The ancient tradition of integrating bodywork and martial arts under one roof – Yin warriorship as a response to cultural chaos and the call of the body – Vitality and animism versus the pathological medicine frame – The role of Eros, eroticism, and sexuality in training spaces – Her journey from D1 basketball to Thai bodywork to martial arts teaching – Couples dojos as somatic, embodied spaces for partnership – Queerness as a state of questioning and healthy boundary transgression What You'll Hear: – Kimberly's introduction to Jaye's work and their collaboration at Ghost Ranch – Creating a home-based dojo and the energetic configuration of practice, treatment, and living space – The interplay of healing and combat knowledge across traditions – Why body workers need to train their own bodies – Sovereignty versus taking on others' energy in bodywork – Transitioning from an all-women's dojo to an all-gender space – The "toxic masculinity" conversation and the abandonment of the masculine – Leadership as emergent, atmosphere-based, and rooted in physical training – The creation of atmospheres: moving away from comparative gaze toward cooperative gaze – Warriorship as a dying art rooted in death awareness, not competition – Frames beyond trauma: warriorship, vitality, eroticism – Training for three years in Thailand and the gray space of becoming a practitioner – The necessity of being in the flesh in a technological age – Eros in training spaces: the puritanical bind of encouraging then discouraging the body's response – Self-modulation and erotic sovereignty as a resource – Sovereignty versus individualism: belonging and exile – The trauma orientation as a cultural and capitalist hindrance – Simple ceremony and self-reverent practice – Yin and Yang: growing capacity in both simultaneously – Emergent teaching versus deterministic scripts in group spaces – Safety as a placation of wildness versus supportive disorientation – Queerness as living off the main path and transgressing boundaries healthily – What "the layers between" means: space, Yin, and limitless possibility – Couples dojos: somatic conversations beyond the sexual context Resources Business: The Body Innate Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico Website: https://www.thebodyinnate.com/ IG: @thebodyinnate

In this episode, Kimberly speaks with Jane Hardwicke Collings, a post-menopausal grandmother, former midwife, and founder of the School of Shamanic Womancraft. They explore how the lessons learned from the natural childbirth movement must now be applied to menopause, discussing what Jane calls "sage-escence," the becoming of the wise woman. Jane shares her journey from hospital nurse to home birth midwife, how her midwifery awakened her to the patriarchy's medicalization of women's bodies, and why she sees a natural menopause movement emerging. They dive deep into the connections between all rites of passage, from menstruation to birth to menopause, and examine how unresolved trauma surfaces during these transitions. The conversation also explores sexuality and the erotic through life's seasons, the impact of childhood trauma on menopausal symptoms, body shame, aging, and the cultural pressure toward hormone therapy versus embracing natural processes. Bio Jane Hardwicke Collings is a post-menopausal grandmother, mother of a blended family with four adult children and four grandchildren. A former Registered Nurse who worked in Paediatric Intensive Care Units and Women's Operating Theatres, she became a midwife at 26 and left the hospital system so as not to be complicit with institutionalized acts of abuse and violence on women and babies masquerading as safety. She was a homebirth midwife for 30 years in city and rural areas of Australia. Jane carries the lineage of Shamanic Midwifery from her teacher Jeannine Parvati Baker and created the School of Shamanic Womancraft in 2009, an international Women's Mystery School. She travels internationally giving workshops on the wisdom of cycles, the spiritual practice of menstruation, sacred dimensions of pregnancy, birth, and menopause, and reclaiming women's rites of passage. She also offers teacher training, books, and e-courses. Jane is a co-creator of Hygieia Health, a not-for-profit with a mission to create freestanding birth centers and fund homebirth. She lives in the bush on the edge of a forest in New South Wales, Australia, committed to walking her talk and treading lightly on the earth. She sees herself as an Agent of the Goddess, a Priestess at the altars of transformation. What She Shares: –Journey from hospital nurse to home birth midwife –Applying lessons from natural childbirth to menopause –Sage-escence: the becoming of the wise woman –How childhood trauma affects menopausal symptoms –Salutogenic vs pathogenic perspectives on women's health –Personal healing journey around sexuality at menopause –Crowning the Crones ceremony –Preparing for the transition to elderhood at 70 What You'll Hear: –Jane's awakening to the patriarchy through midwifery training –Why she left hospital to become a home birth midwife –Bringing midwife eyes and heart to all rites of passage –The state of birth in Australia and globally –Free birth, doulas, and current threats to birth workers –How home birth advocates are embracing medicalized menopause –HRT keeping women in a static hormonal state –The natural menopause movement emerging –Anti-aging culture and the privilege of aging –Body shame rooted in menstrual shame –Kimberly's reflections on cosmetic procedures and nervous system impact –How orgasm and sexuality change across a woman's lifetime –Healing sexual inheritance from mothers and grandmothers –Unresolved trauma surfacing at menopause as healing opportunity –First sexual experience as imprint that unfolds through life –Libido changes through life stages –Finding new reasons for sexuality post-reproduction –The spiral of life: what unfolds at each new season –Honoring crones and receiving their wisdom Resources Website: https://janehardwickecollings.com/ IG: @janehardwickecollings Kimberly's Mobilize Freeze Course: https://kimberlyannjohnson.com/freeze/

Kimberly is joined by luminary thinker Dr. Betty Martin as they discuss the evolution and impact of the Wheel of Consent, a vanguard model for enthusiastic consent, asking for what you want, and living out embodied intimacy. Dr. Martin, who developed the model, shares her journey from creating the wheel through her hands-on workshops to writing a book so the wheel may reach an even larger audience, with Kimberly noting just how deep of an impact Betty's work has had on Kimberly's teaching and offerings. They explore the challenges of enthusiastic consent, the importance of feeling with one's hands, and the universal nature, as well as the cultural nuances, of touch and sex. Betty emphasizes the need for accurate teaching and the development of the wheel of consent in various fields, including therapy, businesses and social justice. The conversation highlights the significance of embodiment and the incomparable emotional impact of present and thoughtful touch. Bio Dr. Betty Martin spent her childhood in a large family and her youth in experimental communities, learning about people in more groups than she can count. Founding a co-housing community with countless hours of meetings taught her the value of excellent facilitation. Now she enjoys helping others learn the skills she picked up along the way. She graduated Chiropractic College in 1976 and practiced for almost 30 years, including several body-mind integration modalities. She has taught Peer Counseling for teens and adults, Educational Kinesiology and other bodywork for professionals, sexuality workshops for women, gender liberation, and boundary and communication workshops of many flavors, including Cuddle Party. After retiring from her Chiropractic practice on Vashon Island, she moved into Seattle and opened a private practice as a relationship and intimacy coach, where she guided people through somatic experiences, sometimes erotic and sometimes not, so they could learn how to be comfortable in their own skin and experience pleasure in ways that supported their development. It was during those years of working with hundreds of people that she noticed and developed the Wheel of Consent, a practice and a model of taking apart receiving and giving. She started sharing her experience with other practitioners and developed the 5-day training, Like a Pro, focusing on the Wheel, communication and professional standards. In 2018 she co-founded the School of Consent, where she has trained numerous facilitators of Wheel of Consent workshops, and a handful of faculty to teach Like a Pro. She is happily handing over teaching to those she has trained, and these days contributes to other organizations' trainings and presents to various professional groups. She also enjoys offering supervision and mentoring to practitioners. She once again lives in community and is the proud mom of 3 and grandma of 2. What You'll Hear Dr. Martin's background in chiropractic, body-mind integration modalities, and her development of the wheel of consent Betty's 13 year writing process and how her clients led her to constantly evolve her concepts for the book The development of the Three-Minute Game the value of taking turns and asking for what you want Why receiving can often be harder than giving. The importance of touch and attention to intimacy Why training new teachers is so important to Dr. Martin They discuss cultural differences as it relates to touch and sex The emergence of the term enthusiastic consent The reach of The Wheel of Consent from relationships to communities to businesses to social movements The exercise of waking up the hands to improve ability to feel with them Resources Website: https://www.wheelofconsent.org/ Ig: @drbettymartin Book: https://www.wheelofconsent.org/thebook Activate Your Inner Jaguar: Sexuality and the Nervous System sign up link is here

Elena Brower, an author, poet, and seasoned yoga teacher, joins to explore themes of radical forgiveness and the quest for daily stillness. She shares insights from her new book, emphasizing the importance of letting go of past narratives for self-discovery. The conversation touches on personal perspectives regarding family, parenting young adults, and navigating menopause. Elena reflects on handling public scrutiny through consistent practice and discusses the challenge of remaining focused in a chaotic world. This exchange is rich with wisdom and practical guidance.

Bio Michel Odent, MD, is a French obstetrician trained as a general surgeon known for his tireless research on how environmental factors present during pregnancy and birth affect babies, children, and our communities. He is the founder of the Primal Health Research Centre and authored the first articles on the initiation of lactation and the use of birthing pools. He has authored 15 books and passed on August 19, 2025. What He Shares: Why birth is an important subject not only for birth workers, but for all people interested in the future of our species. Why the period of birth is a critical period in a person's life The inability to study the long-term, non-specific affect of modern pregnancy and birth practices Exploring the changes in Homo sapiens resulting from birthing practices What You'll Hear: How birthing hormones affect our biological programing Understanding the needs of a laboring person Why the microbiome of a newborn baby affects a their lifelong health How the future of our species is being modified based on birth environments Discovering the correlation between birth choices and children's behavior Developing appropriate questions around new pregnancy and birth practices Improving research ability to answer unknowns The difficulty of understanding the long term risk factors of birthing choices Prioritizing the development of new research questions Why pregnancy is not the best time to educate yourself on these issues Expanding our view beyond the individual choices to the medical establishment Becoming bilingual in the languages of intuitive knowledge and scientific research Exploring how making birth a social event altered the fetal ejection reflex How technological advancements have altered birth Links Youtube of the Interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPKd9TmyMB0

In this episode, Kimberly and Sarah Wildeman dive into the importance of community and relational support and the experiences that led each of them to prioritize community building so centrally in each of their lives. Sarah shares her journey from a communal Christian upbringing to building her own "space of welcome" as an adult. Both Kimberly and Sarah emphasize the need for practical community-building practices, balancing personal needs with community support, and the challenges of maintaining a village in today's world. Sarah's "Our Common Life" program offers a four-month course to help individuals build meaningful community experiences, addressing topics like belonging, conflict resolution, and relational practices as mothers. About Sarah My 'work' in the world is to be a guide and companion, a seer and seeker of beauty, a soul reviver, activator, and community builder. At my core I am driven by deep and meaningful relationships and find my greatest joy in building intentional relational containers to facilitate learning and growth. I am known for my ability to get beyond what presents on the surface to the underlying beliefs or patterns that keep you stuck. I speak honestly and directly with gentleness and clarity. Whether in a group, or one-on-one, my ability to truly see people allows me to call them to their highest potential.My experience working and coaching in complex organizational dynamics has equipped me to work with people to navigate nuanced relationships with authenticity and courage, empowering individuals and teams to get creative and create lasting change. I have a unique inclination to both emotional intuition and strategic thinking, which allows me to create spaciousness while still helping you to 'get stuff done'. With nearly a decade's worth of intentional community living, I am particularly drawn to building rich gathering spaces. I have been a long-time space holder for leaders and community builders as they carry the responsibility of serving others. I have not pursued a status-quo approach to life, and feel uniquely suited to support visionaries in living into their callings.I am also 'Mom' to two strong, beautiful, passionate, creative daughters. Mothering them has been the greatest course there ever was in leadership and personal growth. Family is one of the ways I deeply experience and tend community in my life. My business operates out of Coldstream, BC, which we humbly acknowledge is in the unceded territory of the Syilx tmix , Secwepemcúl'ecw, and Okanagan First Nations. What they discuss: Sarah's upbringing and relationship to ceremony/rites of passage as a child in a non-demonitional Christian church What's an open door policy for a family home? How to find community if it's not through a formal religion? How to find a space of belonging that aligns with us as as adults How do we navigate the loss of community and loss of village? Living in an intentional community Christian community with a focus on environmental stewardship What role do faith and community play in our sense of belonging? How to navigate differences with a spouse in what you are seeking when it comes to communal living? How do you balance family and communal needs? The power of a web of support for families? How communities are insurance policies for care and support. How mothering and child care bring community practices to the fore. Challenges of building community, including the exhaustion and overwhelm that can come from new practices and habits. The importance of compassion and self-awareness in the process of building community, recognizing that it may start small and gradually grow. Strategies for building community, such as starting with small, manageable actions and gradually expanding to larger projects. Introduces her re-villaging program, "Our Common Life" a four-month journey that provides resources and support for building community. Resources Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/our__common/ and @sarahwildeman Website: https://www.our-common.com/ Program: https://www.our-common.com/our-common-life

Jamie Mustard, an author, artist, and researcher, reflects on his traumatic upbringing in Scientology and its lasting impacts. He shares insights from his memoir, 'Child X,' and discusses the innovative Stellate Ganglion Block (SGB) treatment that helped him overcome trauma symptoms. Mustard emphasizes viewing trauma as a biological injury, highlighting its effects across various demographics, from soldiers to survivors. He also explores the potential of alternative therapies and the importance of brain health in recovery, all while advocating for the stories of those who've suffered in silence.

In this episode, Kimberly and Bethany discuss their reflections and experiences of attachment and mothering their adult children. Bethany describes changes in how she viewed herself and parenting while her daughter became an adult herself while Kimberly shares her experiences mothering her daughter who is about to move out of their home for the first time. They share challenges, frustrations, and confusing moments around their attachment and parenting, particularly as they age themselves. As most parenting content focuses on the early years, this conversation reveals the nuances of what attachment parenting actually is and how they are navigating its challenges while parenting their grown daughters. Bio Bethany Saltman is a literary agent, mother, wife, zen practitioner, and author of "Strange Situation: A Mother's Journey Into the Science of Attachment." She has an extensive background in writing, teaching, publishing, and devotes her time as a literary agent helping people put their stories into the world. She is a long-time friend of Kimberly's and a repeat podcast guest. What She Shares: –Different kinds of attachment and the adult attachment test –Mothering through seasons –Generational differences of parenting –Navigating challenges of mothering adult children What You'll Hear: –Different types of attachment –Securely attached is independent –Develop through creativity and exploration with secure base –Flexibility and response with parenting –Behavior versus attachment –Parameters for boundaries when discussing children publicly –Posting children on social media –Attachment research with adults –Generational leaps around attachment and development –Mothering through perimenopause –Hormonal changes through mothering and phases –Similarities between toddler and teenage years –Experiencing the second half of life while mothering –Values shifting through mothering phases –Cultural differences around parenting young adults –Leaving versus staying the nest –Generational differences of survival wiring –Frustrations of parenting adults –Self-actualization leaving parents' house –Adult attachment interview protocol –Mixed feelings shows secure attachment in adulthood –Importance of rupture and repair instead of only positive –Spirituality, religion, and parenting Resources Website: https://www.bethanysaltman.com/ IG: @bethany_saltman Class Sign up for Jagamama Summer School here: https://kimberlyannjohnson.com/jagamama/