Telling the Story of Awakening

Tis’ the season for story-telling. I don’t know about you, but there are certain stories I can hear over and over again. These stories often have mythic and archetypal elements, that seem to resonate with the poetics of the soul.

In the Zen Buddhist tradition the first week of December is the week we commemorate/remember/celebrate the Buddha’s awakening.

We do this with our bodies. Sitting retreat with the orientation that we too can realize our true nature. That we too can awaken.

We do this with our hearts and minds. Reading, listening, contemplating the elements of the Buddha’s story, which is mythic in nature. And as we hear the story of the Buddha we are reminded of our own path—that awakening is possible for us and that it is unfolding right here, in this precious life.

Below I will share a brief sketch of the Buddha’s story. Please listen to the talk if you want to hear a more fleshed out version. Of course, like all stories, this one changes every time it is told. There actually isn’t any recorded biography of the Buddha in the Pali Cannon, we have some references he makes to his journey and scholars/practitioners have worked to put them together in a cohesive narrative.

In this telling, I am choosing the elements that have resonated with me on my own path. I am appreciating how the Buddha’s story has elements of the hero’s journey as well as important dharma teachings.

Maha Maya’s Dream

The story begins with a dream. Maha Maya, whose name means illusion, dreams one night that she is taken to the mountains by four spirit beings. She is then bathed, anointed with oils, perfumes and flowers. A white elephant appears, circles her three times and pierces her side with his six tusks. She awakens from the dream knowing that she is pregnant with a son.

When she tells her husband, King Suddhodana, about the dream he invites the town seer to interpret it. The seer confirms that Maha Maya is indeed pregnant with a son and that he will be either a great king or the founder of a new religion.

Upon hearing this prophesy, King Suddhodana decides to make his son’s life so comfortable that he will never want to leave the palace.

So Siddaratha Gotma (the Buddha) is born, and lives a sheltered life. He describes it in one sutta, saying:

I, lived in refinement, utmost refinement, total refinement. My father even had lotus ponds made in our palace: one where red-lotuses bloomed, one where white lotuses bloomed, one where blue lotuses bloomed, all for my sake… A white sunshade was held over me day & night to protect me from cold, heat, dust, dirt, & dew.

Disillusionment with a Protected Life/The Four Sights

Eventually Siddhartha becomes a young man and one night he wakes before dawn after a party at the palace. He looks around and feels a bit disgusted by what he sees, bodies strewn around, sleeping, smelling of alcohol and sex—from having indulged in all forms of pleasure the night before. His heart questions what he is doing, what kind of life he is living.

After this experience, he feels like he needs to see what is beyond the palace walls. So he enlists his charioteer to take him into the town. While they are there Siddhartha sees what has become known as the four sights. He sees someone who is ill, sick crying out in pain. He sees some who is old, hunched over, skin full of wrinkles and he sees a corpse. With each sight, he feels disgust and curiosity. A knowing arises in him that this will also happen to him. He too will age, become ill and die.

He becomes disillusioned by his current state of health, youth and life. For what is the point in indulging in the pleasures of health, youth and life, if you are ignoring the truths of sickness, old age and death. Something about this experience really starts to way heavy in his heart, and fill him with great doubt.

Then he sees the fourth sight, a renunciate sitting serenely under a tree. He is touched by the look of contentment on this person’s face. Something in him knows that there is a path to realizing a contentment that is beyond sensual pleasures, that one could know freedom, love and joy that wasn’t dependent on conditions.

Leaving His Father’s House

He knows he has to leave his father’s house. It isn’t an easy decision. One I imagine he tries to ignore, but his doubt and curiosity grow stronger and stronger. In one telling of the story, his wife Yasodhara has eight dreams about the path he needs to take, and so encourages him to go. Before he leaves, they make love and conceive a son.

Then Siddhartha shaves his head, puts on the ochre robes of a renunciant and begins the nomadic life of a home-leaver. He meets two teachers, studies with them for years and eventually masters their teachings. But finds that their dharma leads him into deep states of concentration, but does not bring him to liberation. So he eventually leaves them, even though they urge him to teach with them.

He then meets five wandering ascetics and starts practicing austerities. He tries to suppress thought, stop his breath, and survive on one spoonful of food a day—none of these techniques work well for him. He speaks of undergoing great physical and emotional pain but being no closer to liberation. In a state of desperation and hunger, a memory arises from childhood, which he describes:

“I thought: ‘I recall once, when my father the Sakyan was working, and I was sitting in the cool shade of a rose-apple tree, then — quite withdrawn from sensuality, withdrawn from unskillful mental qualities — I entered & remained in the first jhana: rapture & pleasure born from withdrawal, accompanied by directed thought & evaluation. Could that be the path to Awakening?’ Then, following on that memory, came the realization: ‘That is the path to Awakening.’ I thought: ‘So why am I afraid of that pleasure that has nothing to do with sensuality, nothing to do with unskillful mental qualities?’ I thought: ‘I am no longer afraid of that pleasure that has nothing to do with sensuality, nothing to do with unskillful mental qualities, but it is not easy to achieve that pleasure with a body so extremely emaciated. Suppose I were to take some solid food: some rice & porridge.’ So I took some solid food: some rice & porridge.

So he takes some food to nourish his body and with a new clarity, a deeper connection to purpose and himself, he resolves to sit under the bodhi tree until he awakens.

Mara’s Temptations

Though he is clear in his resolve and clear about the path forward, he still encounters great difficulty. Mara (the tempter or doubting voice in Siddhartha) appears during his meditations tempting him, creating feelings of restlessness in body and in mind, showing scenes from the pleasures he used to have at the palace, conjuring fear/doubt and telling him to give up.

Siddhartha eventually sees Mara for what they are, a voice of doubt, and Mara slinks away.

The Buddha awakens, upon seeing the morning star rising in the east, after a week of meditation. On the final night he has insights into impermanence, cause and effect and finally the nature of suffering/bondage and the path that leads to the cessation of suffering/bondage.

He says in one story, “I, together with all beings and the great earth, awaken.”

In another he says:

House-builder, you’re seen! You will not build a house again.

All your rafters broken, the ridge pole destroyed, gone to the Unformed, the mind

has come to the end of craving.

The earth rises up and confirms the Buddha’s awakening. After Mara appears and throws more shade on the Buddha.

The Buddha questions whether or not he can teach. And remains sitting under the Bodhi tree for another week. During this time a great storm rolls through, and Mucilinda (the snake king), protects the Buddha from the storm with his seven heads.

It’s also said that on the night that the Buddha awakened, his wife, Yasodhara gave birth to their son, Rahula. She had been carrying their son for six years, and underwent he own spiritual journey, never leaving home.

Does the story really end here? Not really, practice-awakening continues, on and on and on. There are many ways to appreciate a story like this, I have been enjoying looking at the story from the lens of the hero’s journey.

So many of the elements of the Buddha’s story are elements that are a part of our own life and the path of practice-awakening. I the new year, I will offer some teachings and reflections on elements of the hero’s journey and the spiritual path. But for now, I would love to hear if any elements from the Buddha’s story touched you in anyway.

* Have you had important dreams that gave you confidence about the next step on your path, even if it didn’t make rational sense?

* What is your own experience of being disillusioned? Or needing to challenge a teaching, belief or lifestyle that you were raised in? How has doubt been part of your path?

* Can you relate to having an experience as a child that feels connected to your path/practice now? Sometimes it feels like we are relearning something we knew naturally as children, does this feel true to you?

* The Buddha was supported and protected by the Earth and the snake king—what protectors, supporters or allies have you had in your own life (people, animals, plants, places, dream figures)?

* I appreciate Yasodhara’s story as one that happens in the dark space of unknowing, unfolding in her home as she cares for the child she is carrying. In what ways has your own path/practice had elements of darkness, hiddenness, not-knowing and/or nurturing something precious that perhaps you don’t yet know what it is?

* Are there any other elements of the Buddha’s story that resonate or that you feel curious about?

Weekly Online Meditation Event

Monday Night Dharma — 6P PT / 9P ET Join weekly for drop-in meditation and dharma talk. Monday Dec 15th we will do some seasonal reflection as Ango ends and we approach the winter solstice.

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Universe Somatic is a practice that integrates group meditation, movement and energy work with a spirit of experimentation and playfulness. We explore the union of spaciousness and embodied energies in a contemplative practice that is embodied and expressive.

The theme for this Universe Somatic is The Bright Thread In the Dark. We will play in knowing and not-knowing, hope and despair, yin and yang, creation and destruction, dancing in deep relationship with these polarities while also listening for the thread that doesn’t get stuck on either side.

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I’m Amy Kisei. I am a Zen Buddhist Teacher, Spiritual Counselor, Astrologer and Artist. I offer 1:1 Spiritual Counseling sessions using IFS and Hakomi (somatic mindfulness). I also offer astrology readings. Check out my website to learn more. I currently live in Columbus, OH and am a supporting teacher for the Mud Lotus Sangha.

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