We’re keeping it in the family for this monumental episode of SATC S1E6 “Secret Sex,” an allegory for the gay experience.

Carrie goes on her date with Mr. Big in the tits-on-toast dress, Miranda does the ‘90s equivalent of going through your date's search history and finds a spanking fetish, Charlotte is, of course, being waspy and divulges about screwing a Hasidic folk artist, and Samantha is cool with it all.

Find out why you should never mess with a cheese monger, the argument for bringing back brick-and-mortar dates, and why kicking someone in the face is a great way to break the ice.

Justice for Libby!

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Sex and the City S1E6: "Secret Sex"