Raising Boys & Girls

Episode 315: Understanding the Reformer and Enneagram 1’s with David Thomas and Sissy Goff

Oct 9, 2025
A lively dive into Enneagram Type 1 traits and why reformers strive for rightness. They unpack the relentless inner critic and how it shapes behavior. Practical ideas to channel perfectionism into projects and practice “good enough.” Parenting tips for raising conscientious kids and spiritual practices to replace constant self-judgment.
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ANECDOTE

Broken Foot Made A One Vocalize Perfection Need

  • Sissy admitted she said aloud that "it just makes me feel better about life when everything's in its place" while picking up clothes.
  • She shared this while wearing a broken-foot boot, showing how small disorder amplifies a one's distress.
INSIGHT

Relentless Inner Critic Defines Ones

  • Ones carry an ever-present inner critic that consistently points out mistakes and never gives a Sabbath.
  • David describes this critic as relentless, causing constant internal war and translating into external criticism of others.
INSIGHT

Resentment Reveals Ones' Inner Anger

  • Ones' external criticism often signals harsh self-judgment; their anger commonly shows as resentment rather than outbursts.
  • Sissy and David call this the anger triad with eights and nines and describe resentful stomping and fast movement as typical expressions.
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