soju with sarah navigating the toxicity of east asian cliques… (soju advice column #5)
Dec 12, 2025
Delve into the complexities of adulting and friendships in your 20s and 30s. Explore the dynamics of toxic East Asian cliques and how to establish boundaries in social settings. Discover lighthearted dating advice and learn how to attract the right partner. Hear firsthand struggles of navigating a drinking culture when you don’t indulge. Plus, get practical tips on how to assert yourself at work and communicate effectively. Join the journey of self-discovery, laughter, and personal growth!
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From Molten Lava To Diamond
- James and Sarah joked about a fan asking how to 'get a handsome guy like James' and admitted growth happened over time.
- Sarah teased that she found James during a lower point and helped him improve.
Why Cliques Form In Asian Circles
- East Asian friend groups can become clicky and ostracizing due to pressure to conform and uniform backgrounds.
- Diversity within groups and individual friendships reduce that toxicity.
Try Leading Inclusion, Or Walk Away
- Test a group's malleability by introducing newcomers and observing receptiveness; act as a mediator when possible.
- Prioritize individual friendships or mixed-background groups over uniform cliques.