How To! with Mike Pesca How to Emigrate as a Throuple
Feb 24, 2026
Charley Nieuwesteeg, a Dutch immigration lawyer who knows the Dutch-American Friendship Treaty, and Dan Savage, a writer and longtime relationship columnist exploring relocation with his polyamorous throuple. They discuss using DAFT to establish residency, how partners can sponsor one another, daisy-chain migration limits, business and residency timelines, and using the Netherlands as a base for travel in Europe.
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Use DAFT To Get Dutch Residency
- Use the Dutch-American Friendship Treaty to obtain residency by starting a small business as an American passport holder.
- Charley Nieuwesteeg notes a business bank deposit of roughly €4,500 and a sole proprietorship are sufficient to get a two-year residence permit.
Netherlands Accepts Nonexclusive Partner Proof
- Dutch law allows a DAFT sponsor to bring either a married partner or an unmarried partner without requiring exclusivity.
- Charley explains proving a genuine relationship (photos, letters, emails) suffices even if the couple is polyamorous.
Dan's Travel Exemption Documents Example
- Dan Savage used photos, emails, letters, and local attestations to prove a longstanding romantic partner exemption during pandemic travel bans.
- He describes editing emails and collecting letters from people who knew them as a helpful document pile.