Our hosts discuss the recent research by Jindi Mann into men's emotional experiences at work. It is easily downloaded as a pdf and it's freely available - no email signup or any hoops to jump through. They surveyed 55 male managers, primarily British and working in a mid to senior management role. The results show a surprisingly broad range of responses. Over coffee Pilar and Tim explore what it means to be a male manager. A big theme that emerges is that whilst 21st century corporate leadership has been dominated by men, men feel limited in how much of themselves they can bring to work. Show notes:
00:30 mins Pilar shares how she came into contact with Jindi and his men's circles through her Facilitation Stories podcast (you can listen to Jindi and Pilar's conversation about facilitating dialogue spaces in episode 58)
4:45 The first section of the report (page 6) shows the emotions that men feel most often at work: frustration 33%, anxiety 24%, anticipation 22%, fear 22%, joy 20%, trust 16% and anger 13%. Tim is surprised how many of these are emotions he'd prefer to not experience at work (with a quick shoutout to Jeremy Dean's Emotional Culture Deck.). Pilar as always tries to see the bright side, but even she is worried after seeing the full range of responses as a word cloud (page 7).
7:45 Tim struggles to understand the irony that our workplaces have been so dominated by men, particularly at the most senior levels, and yet this same work environment creates so much unhappiness for male managers.
8:50 Many work cultures have become warmer and more inclusive but there is still a lot of room for improvement.
9:30 The second section talks about what men would like to be able to talk about at work: mental health, stress, insecurity and their personal life. Pilar and Tim speculate on whether these responses would be different with women. It's interesting to note how men want something quite different to the alpha male stereotype.
14:10 It feels like progress just for men to be sharing their emotional needs. Tim jumps down to section 6 which talks about what vulnerability means to men. The results are so polarising: Some men view vulnerability as strength and courage, whereas others see it as weakness and shame. What a cognitive dissonance it must create for this latter group when modern leadership practice encourages leaders to be vulnerable!
17:10 We've been rightly focussed on gender equality in the workplace and the world is changing. It's important that men also get some space to explore these changes. It's complicated, we still need so much to change but we need men to be a part of the solution. And understanding how men might struggle with the direction work is heading can help us all.
21:30 It's important that those with a natural affinity for emotional literacy and vulnerability are aware that not everyone finds it easy. For some men particularly it can be a real struggle and they have an easy out to default back to a "strong silent type".
23:30 Some of the actions proposed in the research include role modelling, safe spaces for conversations and greater psychological safety.
25:40 Tim shares that he and Duncan were lucky to work in an environment at Shield GEO that was 80% female. And amongst the many benefits they experienced, it was relatively easier to be expressive because it was a safe and supportive environment. Which brings us to another point of irony - that men might feel better able to express themselves at work if there was more diversity in management roles.
27:30 Tim thinks that men are secretly crying out for more gender balanced leadership.
What about you, dear listener? Do you think male leaders are finding it difficult to be themselves at work? We'd love to hear from you! Get in touch through our Contact Form https://managementcafepodcast.com/contact/