58: Making Major Life Choices with Jenny

Do you feel a yearning to have a child? All women feel a desire to create, to give birth to things and to experience unconditional love. Sometimes, we project that on external things. Or, maybe we women feel we need to have a purpose. It may be that we need to move into a place of unconditional love for ourselves. We need to learn to love and nurture ourselves. You don't want to have a child and then expect the child to fill your inner voids, or to make up for all the places you don't love yourself. We should be as clear as possible about our decision to have a child, before bringing a baby into the world, so we do not project our emotional wounds on to the child. So consider, are you sure it is a baby you want, or is it something else you are yearning for? It takes courage to investigate what is true for us. Today's caller, Jenny, is struggling with whether or not she wants to have children. As we dig deeper, it becomes apparent her issue is really about her honoring her own truth, and how she may not be able to reach clarity on the issue until she clears up some old beliefs and patterns. They are many reasons why you may not be 100% clear about a decision you are facing. Your clarity may be affected if you are not at a good point in life to make the decision, or if you are too impacted by what other people think, or society's expectations of you. You may also have difficulty if you have issues from your past influencing you, or if you are considering the choice as an either-or. All of these things can keep you in limbo. Consider form versus essence, where the baby is the form, and the essence is everything you think that baby is going to make you feel. If you are longing to become a parent, what is it you want to feel, and how can you bring it into your life now? The more you trust you are able to mother or father yourself in a loving way, the better mother you will be. Practice forgiving any misunderstandings about what being a parent means, that you may have bought into when you were a child. My personal mastery coaching course, Over It and On With It, is now open for registration until October 20th, 2016. The 6-week course includes a 90-minute call every other week, worksheets, guided meditations and more. This course is the best of my spiritual practices and practical tips. An investment in yourself is the best investment you will ever make. Go to ChristineHassler.com/Mastery to register or email Jill@ChristineHassler.com. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you feeling the pressure of your biological clock? ● Are you struggling with a big life choice? ● In dating, or any other relationship, do you struggle with your own authenticity? Jenny's Question: Jenny feels the subject of having children is coming up more and more during her relationships, but she's not sure where she stands on the issue. Jenny's Key Insights and Aha's: ● Her early motherhood influences were not positive. ● She doesn't feel pressure from her biological clock, it's pressure from other people about her biological clock. ● She wants to be married in the future. ● She tends to be repeating the patterns of her mother. ● She may not unconditionally love herself. ● She wants to find the perfect partner. ● She can not seem to get to the root of her issue. ● Her definition of authenticity may need to be adjusted. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should stop looking to other people to help her make her decisions. ● She should find self-love and self-trust within herself, before making the decision to have a child. ● She should try to bring out the mother archetype within herself. ● She should trust her intuition. ● She should write out her misunderstandings she adopted when she was a child. ● She should ask for guidance during her spiritual practice. ● She should rephrase her authenticity statement. Assignments and Takeaways: ● Look at what is impacting your choices ○ Are you too far ahead of yourself? ○ Are you too impacted by what other people think? ○ Are there issues from your past, clouding your judgment? ○ Are you holding your choice as an either-or? ● If you are longing to be a parent look at the ways you can do it right now. ● Make new agreements with yourself, you are able to keep. Resources: Christine Hassler How to Make Change Happen and stick! FREE Webinar Valid until 10-20-2016 Over It and On With It Personal Mastery Coaching Course Expectation Hangover Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com