Stay at the Top S4E13. How to go from self-neglect to self compassion with Dr Hayley D Quinn
Nov 17, 2025
In this conversation, Dr. Hayley D. Quinn, a clinical psychologist and author of From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion, highlights the often-overlooked connection between high achievement and self-neglect. She discusses how societal conditioning leads ambitious individuals to mistake sacrifice for strength. Hayley shares practical tools for cultivating self-compassion, emphasizing the importance of awareness and value-aligned choices. Plus, she offers insights into overcoming self-criticism and leading with compassion to prevent burnout. A must-listen for anyone striving to balance performance and wellbeing!
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Catch Criticism, Check Values
- Develop awareness of self-criticism and cultivate a compassionate relationship with yourself.
- When comparing, ask if others' choices align with your values before imitating them.
Choose Real Care Over Performance
- Pause and notice if cultural 'shoulds' push you to perform instead of attend to your needs.
- Prioritise small authentic self-care acts over performative celebration when depleted.
Treat Yourself Like A New Friend
- Get to know yourself like you'd get to know a new friend: ask questions and listen to bodily signals.
- Before saying yes, notice if the choice makes you exhale or feel immediate stress or resentment.
