Finding Brave 237: Summer Pick #5: 5 Ways to Use Rejection To Fuel Your Success
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"Now that I'm older, I truly think about it differently. Every single rejection you get, I have learned, if you listen and observe carefully without all the defensiveness and the ego getting hysterical, it can unlock amazing doors for you." - Kathy Caprino
Rejection, both from others and from inner selves, is a common issue faced by the many thousands of women I have heard from and worked with. This is why in this episode of Finding Brave, I talk about the different aspects of rejection and how we can handle it in a new way - one that fuels and expands our success instead of crushing it.
How you handle and feel about rejection will directly determine the degree to which you can experience growth, fulfillment and excitement on the journey to your goals. Some time ago, I posted an image with a quote about rejection on LinkedIn, and it resonated with many folks, with over 55,000 views and 1,100 likes in just a few days.
It may be hard to believe sometimes, but rejection can and will lead to amazing success if you approach it the right way. Today I share my own personal, and often painful, experiences around being rejected, and I share 5 positive lessons rejection can offer that can fuel your success, rather than demoralize you and set you back.
As always I would love to hear how this episode resonates with you, and I'd love to hear how you've overcome rejection in ways that opened door to more thrilling opportunities that you're grateful for. Please reach out to me by email, or on social media via LinkedIn, or on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Pinterest to say hello and share your ideas!
Highlights from this Episode:
- The ways I reacted to rejection when I was younger versus how I think about it today [6:07]
- How rejection can lead to making valuable changes to your idea, project or product [9:17]
- Why the timing, and actually being ready for success, matters so much [14:36]
- The reason I'm such a fan of research regarding new products and programs but why your friends shouldn't be the ones you turn to for it [16:47]
- The way to approach feedback so that you're not limiting your own success unintentionally [18:57]
- How you can begin to recognize how amazing you are and why this is necessary to live the best life you can [21:42]
- What to identify in order to share a more authentic self [24:28]
- How to know when "perfectionistic overfunctioning" is holding you back [30:02]
Resources Mentioned:
Kathy's Career Path Self-Assessment
Kathy's Close Your Power Gaps private coaching program
Kathy's article – 3 Key Steps to Moving from Self-Rejection Toward Self-Love
Kathy's TEDx Talk "Time to Brave Up"
Kathy video and post:
What Is Feminism and Why Do So Many Men and Women Hate It
Kathy's Forbes post: How Being Raised by a Narcissist Affects Your Self-Esteem
Kathy's Forbes interview: What Selling Three Million Copies of 'The Dance of Anger' Has Taught Harriet Lerner
Kathy's Forbes interview: What the Most Rejected Person in the World Can Teach About Triumph and Creating Work We Love featuring Daniel Seddiqui
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QUOTES:
"I love to look at what the big challenges are so that we can address those with eyes wide open, and so we can move forward faster, better and easier." [2:46]
"What I see in so many thousands of women that I hear from and work with is there's a lot of self-rejection going on." [3:44]
"10 years ago nobody cared about professional women's challenges. That's the difference 10 years can make." [14:04]
"The Universe sometimes pushes back on an idea and makes you wait until it can come to fruition, because the timing wasn't right." [14:24]
"Feedback, which can be rejection-oriented, can actually inform you, but you're not going to hear it and you're not going to understand it if you are too busy defending yourself and being angry at it." [20:14]
"You're not self-absorbed and you're not narcissistic just because you love yourself." [25:13]
"You will develop more self-love the more you put yourself out there." [27:31]
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