Listener question: what's at stake?

Listener question: Am still struggling to understand the ‘what’s at stake’ part of going deeper and being curious and feeling the feelings. I feel like there are so many patterns and conditioning bubbling to the surface to be seen, but when I ask the question ‘what is at stake’ I come up with an answer and I don’t know if it’s true. Or my mind just making something up? Or I just hit a brick wall. Can I give you an example please…. I get really anxious on hot days. I endlessly check the weather to see what it’s going to be like and if it falls into my narrow band of ok weather it’s a sigh of relief, if it’s over 22 degrees I feel the contraction of anxiety and start worrying about it before the day has actually arrived. I even check the direction of the wind because if it’s from the south it’s a major disaster! I wake up anxious about the hot day to come. I have done this forever. I watch myself doing it now, the checking, the worry thoughts, the anxious feelings, and I ask myself what’s at stake here? Somewhere something is telling me that I think people pass out in the heat and that might happen to me, that I look awful with a sweaty head and hair, that it means I should be at the beach or in the country having nice sunny days out and that’s impossible right now because of high anxiety levels. There’s so much story to this one thing! Am I on the right track with this Clare. What’s at stake is the idea of myself passing out, looking sweaty, mid panic on a beach in front of hundreds of people? It all about how this imagined idea of me should look and act? Sorry if this sounds crazy and confusing.

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