The Nonlinear Library LW - Navigating emotions in an uncertain & confusing world by Akash
Nov 21, 2023
05:23
Welcome to The Nonlinear Library, where we use Text-to-Speech software to convert the best writing from the Rationalist and EA communities into audio. This is: Navigating emotions in an uncertain & confusing world, published by Akash on November 21, 2023 on LessWrong.
The last few days have been confusing, chaotic, and stressful. We're still trying to figure out what happened with Sam Altman and OpenAI and what the aftermath will look like.
I have personally noticed my emotions fluctuating more. I have various feelings about the community, about the current state of the world, about the increasingly strong pressures to view the world in terms of factions, about the current state of AIS discourse, and the current state of the AI safety community.
Between now and AGI, there will likely be other periods of high stress, confusion, or uncertainty. I figured it might be a good idea for me to write down some thoughts that I have found helpful or grounding.
If you have noticed feelings of your own, or any strategies that have helped you, I encourage you to share them in the comments.
Frames I find helpful & grounding
1. On whether my actions matter. In some worlds, my actions will not matter. Maybe I am too late to meaningfully affect things. Maybe this is true of my friends, allies, and community as well. In the extreme case, at some point we will pass a "point of no return"- the point where my actions and those of my community no longer have any meaningful effect on the world. I can accept this uncertainty, and I can choose to focus on the worlds where my actions still matter.
2. On not having clear end-to-end impact stories. There are not many things that make a meaningful difference, but there are a few. I know of at least one that I was meaningfully part of, and I know of a few others that my friends & allies were part of. Sometimes, these things will not be clear in advance. (Ex: I wrote the initial draft of a sentence that ended up becoming the CAIS statement, but at the time, I did not realize that was going to be a big deal.
It felt like an interesting side project, and I certainly didn't have a clear end-to-end impact story for it. Of course, it is valuable to strive for projects that have ex-ante end-to-end impact stories, and it is dangerous to adopt a "well, IDK why this is good, but hopefully it will work out" mentality.
3. On friendship. I am lucky to have found friends and allies who are trying to make the world a better place. In the set of all possible lives, I have found myself in one where I am regularly in contact with people who are fighting to make the world better and safer. I can strive to absorb some of Alice's relentless drive to solve problems, Bob's ability to speak with integrity and build coalitions, Carol's deep understanding of technical issues, etc.
4. Gratitude to the community. The AI safety community has provided me a lot: knowledge, motivation, thinking skills, friendships, and concrete opportunities to make the world better. I would not be here without the community. When I reflect on this, I feel viscerally grateful to the community.
5. Criticism of the community. The AI safety community has made mistakes and undoubtedly continues to make important mistakes. I can feel grateful for certain parts of the community while speaking out against others. There is no law that says that the "community" must be fully good or fully bad- and indeed, it is neither.
6. On identifying with the EA or AIS community. I do not have to identify with a community or all parts of it. I can find specific people and projects that I choose to contribute to. I can be aware of how the community impacts me, both positively and negatively. I can try to extract its lessons and best practices while being aware of its dangers.
I can be grateful for the fact that I have become a more precise communicator, I have new ways of monitoring my uncertainty, and I speak & think more probabilistically. This can coincide with concerns I...
The last few days have been confusing, chaotic, and stressful. We're still trying to figure out what happened with Sam Altman and OpenAI and what the aftermath will look like.
I have personally noticed my emotions fluctuating more. I have various feelings about the community, about the current state of the world, about the increasingly strong pressures to view the world in terms of factions, about the current state of AIS discourse, and the current state of the AI safety community.
Between now and AGI, there will likely be other periods of high stress, confusion, or uncertainty. I figured it might be a good idea for me to write down some thoughts that I have found helpful or grounding.
If you have noticed feelings of your own, or any strategies that have helped you, I encourage you to share them in the comments.
Frames I find helpful & grounding
1. On whether my actions matter. In some worlds, my actions will not matter. Maybe I am too late to meaningfully affect things. Maybe this is true of my friends, allies, and community as well. In the extreme case, at some point we will pass a "point of no return"- the point where my actions and those of my community no longer have any meaningful effect on the world. I can accept this uncertainty, and I can choose to focus on the worlds where my actions still matter.
2. On not having clear end-to-end impact stories. There are not many things that make a meaningful difference, but there are a few. I know of at least one that I was meaningfully part of, and I know of a few others that my friends & allies were part of. Sometimes, these things will not be clear in advance. (Ex: I wrote the initial draft of a sentence that ended up becoming the CAIS statement, but at the time, I did not realize that was going to be a big deal.
It felt like an interesting side project, and I certainly didn't have a clear end-to-end impact story for it. Of course, it is valuable to strive for projects that have ex-ante end-to-end impact stories, and it is dangerous to adopt a "well, IDK why this is good, but hopefully it will work out" mentality.
3. On friendship. I am lucky to have found friends and allies who are trying to make the world a better place. In the set of all possible lives, I have found myself in one where I am regularly in contact with people who are fighting to make the world better and safer. I can strive to absorb some of Alice's relentless drive to solve problems, Bob's ability to speak with integrity and build coalitions, Carol's deep understanding of technical issues, etc.
4. Gratitude to the community. The AI safety community has provided me a lot: knowledge, motivation, thinking skills, friendships, and concrete opportunities to make the world better. I would not be here without the community. When I reflect on this, I feel viscerally grateful to the community.
5. Criticism of the community. The AI safety community has made mistakes and undoubtedly continues to make important mistakes. I can feel grateful for certain parts of the community while speaking out against others. There is no law that says that the "community" must be fully good or fully bad- and indeed, it is neither.
6. On identifying with the EA or AIS community. I do not have to identify with a community or all parts of it. I can find specific people and projects that I choose to contribute to. I can be aware of how the community impacts me, both positively and negatively. I can try to extract its lessons and best practices while being aware of its dangers.
I can be grateful for the fact that I have become a more precise communicator, I have new ways of monitoring my uncertainty, and I speak & think more probabilistically. This can coincide with concerns I...