Cycle of retraumatisation: example from social media

Cycle of retraumatisation: example from social media 


My partner moved in at the beginning of the year, a month later we bought our first puppy. Neither of us has owned a dog before but were both super excited.
 
 I hate my life now. I was so happy with my partner moving in, it felt so natural and my 12 year DD adjusted well too. Home has always been my favourite place and now I absolutely hate being here. My partner is very active in caring for pup so it’s not like he’s not helping. 
 
 We’ve just had a row over pup as he tried to come downstairs and take over because he thought I was getting too angry. This just felt so patronising and obviously hit a nerve because I do feel like the worlds shittest dog owner.
 
 He loves pup and they are best mates, I just feel like the evil puppy hater and I’m jealous of the bond they have. I’ve had 3 hours sleep tonight and I'm currently on the sofa next to pups crate just crying. Someone please tell me it gets better because I’m starting to feel very very dark.

I’m just gobsmacked at the emotional toll it’s taking. I find the screech type barking really hard and I don’t have a huge amount of patience. My partner does though so I just feel so inferior. 
 
 
 
 I wasn’t a great mum to my daughter when she was born and it’s triggering that exact same guilt. I knew it would be hard I just didn’t expect it to make me miserable and resentful