Stop Being So Realistic: Why You’re Playing Yourself By Playing It Safe [Solo]

Aug 12, 2025

Exploring the trap of realism, the discussion dives into how it can shrink our goals and reinforce negativity. A TikTok experiment reignites the motivation to think bigger. With insights on redefining what’s 'realistic' and embracing challenges, listeners are encouraged to pursue their bold dreams. Learn to turn envy into inspiration and navigate the emotional costs of being a pioneer. Plus, practical journaling homework prompts reflection on forgotten ambitions. It's a call to ditch self-sabotage and embrace grand possibilities!

Ask episode

AI Snips

Chapters

Transcript

Episode notes

ADVICE

Quit Automatic Venting

Limit habitual venting that reinforces being 'realistic' about negative outcomes.
Replace repetitive complaint loops with language that acknowledges positives as equally real.

ANECDOTE

Podcast Started From Voice Memos

Les Alfred described starting this podcast from voice memos and a notes app before sharing it publicly.
She used that early, imperfect beginning to remind listeners that things don't need to be polished to start.

ANECDOTE

Leaving A Comfortable Job

Les Alfred shared feeling stuck in a 'good enough' local job where others told her to stay.
She left and later looked back wishing she'd trusted her sense of more sooner.

Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode

Get the app

#304: Is being too “realistic” keeping you stuck?

This week, I’m getting into something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately: how being “realistic” can actually be a form of shrinking our goals to fit our fears.

In this solo episode, I’m unpacking why being realistic isn’t always the wise or grounded choice it’s made out to be, and how it might actually be self-sabotage disguised as protection.

I also share some mindset shifts that have helped me stop shrinking my goals to fit what feels “safe” and start thinking bigger again—without spiraling into overwhelm. If you’ve ever talked yourself out of something because it felt too bold or too unlikely, this one’s for you.

In this episode, I talk about:

Why “being realistic” can be a trap
How I’ve noticed it showing up in my own life
What to do when your big goals start to feel too far away
The difference between grounded strategy and self-sabotage
Encouragement to stop playing small and dream a little bigger

Resources:

Follow me on IG @lesalfred
Follow She’s So Lucky on IG @shessoluckypod
Follow me on TikTok @balancedles
Follow She’s So Lucky on TikTok @shessoluckypod
Download my free Best Case Scenario Journal Template

Sponsors:

Nutrafol: Get stronger, healthier hair with Nutrafol. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering $10 OFF your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to nutrafol.com and enter promo code BALANCEDLES.
Shopify: Start your online business with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial at shopify.com/balancedblackgirl.
Simply Pop is a new fruit-forward bevy of prebiotic sodas with 6 grams of fiber. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try it.
The Real Real: The Real Real is attainable luxury that upgrades your personal style. Get $25 off your first purchase when you go to therealreal.com/lucky.
Function: Take charge of your health through lab testing with Function. Visit functionhealth.com/lucky or use the gift code LUCKY for a $100 credit towards your membership.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.