206 Expressing Feelings when Systems Fail and Frustrate Us

Aug 29, 2023

The podcast discusses expressing feelings when systems fail and frustrate us, including frustrations with doctors and the DMV. They explore the importance of advocating for personal needs, setting boundaries in medical settings, and seeking support when overwhelmed. The speakers reflect on the impact of industries on perceptions and the struggle of setting boundaries. They emphasize the empowerment that comes from being true to oneself.

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ANECDOTE

DMV And Document Frustration Trigger

Patricia describes a DMV and documents nightmare that took weeks and triggered a meltdown in her car.
She links the frustration to middle-name mismatches, shared-bill habits, and repetitive portal failures.

INSIGHT

Howling As Healthy Emotional Discharge

Discharging pent-up frustration (howling, stimming) reduces physiological arousal and prevents prolonged dysregulation.
Both hosts normalize responsible emotional release as restorative rather than shameful.

ANECDOTE

Medical Visit That Escalated Into Bureaucracy

Patricia recounts a medical visit where residents pushed statins and attempted to change a compounded medication.
The visit led to dysregulation, multiple clinic/pharmacy errors, and weeks of follow-up to secure her prescription.

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Expressing Feelings When Systems Fail and Frustrate Us

I had a meltdown after reaching my frustration limit. Jen & I discuss how to discharge frustration, while navigating inefficient systems. What prevents us from speaking up, and our concern about how we are perceived. How to advocate for yourself, and get support from others, especially when you're dysregulated. How do you stay grounded and focused on getting your needs met when things are breaking down? We also discuss how much healing we've done in our friendship, and how setting boundaries builds trust.

CO-HOST

Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC

HIGHLIGHTS

Allowing oneself and others to fully experience and express emotions without judgment or shame has benefits.
Brene Brown's video on blaming offers insight into why people sometimes blame others instead of expressing emotions.
Discharging emotions in a healthy way, such as through howling or other outlets, can release pent-up energy.
Connection in relationships is prioritized over calmness, and supporting others' emotions is important.
Advocating for personal needs and setting boundaries is crucial in medical settings.
Seeking support from trusted friends or a support system when overwhelmed is valuable.
Expressing emotions responsibly can lead to less distress and better emotional well-being.
Suppressing emotions can result in anxiety, depression, or chronic stress.
Patricia reflects on her upbringing where emotions were often suppressed, while Jen encourages her children to express their feelings.
Navigating frustrations and meltdowns can teach resilience, patience, and personal growth.

PODCAST HOST

Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, but is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is neurodivergent helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on understanding what it means to be an HSP, self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you

CO-HOST BIO

Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive People thrive in love, work, and parenting Highly Sensitive Children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering.

LINKS

Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself by Nedra Glover Tawwab

Jen's Links

Email: Jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com

Jen's website: https://heartfulnessconsulting.com/

Patricia's Links

HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/

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Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com