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#1059 - James Sexton - Marriage Lessons from Divorce Court

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Feb 14, 2026

Guest

James Sexton

James Sexton, a New York divorce lawyer and author, shares sharp takes on prenups, relationship rules, and why sudden wealth or retirement strain marriages. Short, candid conversations cover when to raise a prenup, framing agreements as safety, conflict repair tactics, sexual novelty, and signs it’s time to leave.

01:58:36

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Episode notes

Athletes’ Money And Marriages Clash

James Sexton explains athletes' monastic discipline and how it helps and harms marriages.
He notes NFL players often get huge contracts early, leading to marriages entered before financial maturity.

Retirement Creates Dangerous Silence

Sexton compares retiring athletes' silence to soldiers returning from war with little support and increased divorce risk.
He describes retirement as a deafening silence that unmoors focused athletes and strains relationships.

Marriage Is A Major Legal Contract

Marriage is the most legally significant act after death because the state immediately alters rights and obligations.
Sexton highlights that couples receive no pamphlet explaining these sweeping legal changes.

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Athletes, money and marriage dynamics

01:40 • 3min

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Why retirement triggers divorces

04:15 • 2min

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Toughest opposing clients in court

06:40 • 2min

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Everyone already has a prenup — legally

08:49 • 3min

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Strange state laws and evidentiary quirks

Do prenups reduce divorce?

16:45 • 3min

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When to bring up a prenup

19:50 • 4min

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Framing prenups as safety and trust

24:00 • 2min

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Behavioral agreements and relationship economy

Talking about baselines and conflict

32:14 • 6min

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Good disagreement and weaponized intimacy

38:40 • 4min

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Hit Send Now: pause versus immediate repair

42:20 • 6min

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Start relationships with open conversations

Sexual novelty and conscious relating

53:57 • 9min

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Masculinity, purpose and the gentlemanosphere

When to leave: loneliness and repair attempts

01:15:10 • 9min

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Sexual monotony and behavior modification

01:23:40 • 13min

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Best and worst breakup recovery strategies

01:36:19 • 11min

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Aging, long marriages and choosing to stay

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James Sexton is a New York-based divorce attorney and author, known for his expertise in family law and insights on marriage and divorce.

What does it actually take to avoid divorce? In a world where most marriages don’t last, it’s easy to assume you’ll be the exception, until reality hits. So how do you prepare for a great marriage… and, if things don’t work out, make sure you’re equipped to handle a clean separation?

Expect to learn what kind of marriages athletes and actors mostly have, the most difficult profession to navigate divorce with, the worst marriage advice to give someone, how prenups actually work, how to set your relationships up for success at the start, how to argue well as a couple, how to know when it's time to quit and much more…

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