Raising Boys & Girls Episode 367: Capable the Toddler Years with David and Sissy
Apr 16, 2026
They explore toddlers’ drive for autonomy and why “I do it myself” signals healthy development. They contrast calm separations with anxious attachment and offer short, confident drop-off language. Boundaries plus empathy are highlighted as ways to create security. Practical ideas for age-appropriate responsibilities and tools for self-regulation are discussed.
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Toddler 'I Do It Myself' Is Healthy Autonomy
- Toddlers' insistence on doing things themselves signals healthy autonomy, not defiance.
- Sissy Goff and David Thomas explain toddlers learn by doing, failing, and doing it badly, so stepping in quickly interrupts capability-building.
Separation Teaches Trust Not Damages Attachment
- Repeated separations teach children trust because they experience I was okay and you came back.
- David Thomas and Sissy contrast secure attachment with anxious attachment and say avoiding separations robs kids of learning trust.
Use Short Clear Drop Off Scripts
- Use short, clear, confident statements at drop-off like I'm going to go and I'll be back to boost a toddler's confidence.
- Sissy recommends brief scripts and empathetic reminders such as I know it's hard but I always come back.
