Philosophy For Our Times The importance of giving up | Adam Phillips
16 snips
Oct 28, 2025 
In this engaging conversation, Adam Phillips, a distinguished British psychoanalytic psychotherapist and essayist, explores the often-overlooked value of giving up. He challenges the cultural idolization of perseverance, suggesting that sometimes, stepping back can be a creative act that allows personal growth. Phillips discusses the harmful effects of relentless duty on enjoyment and advocates for teaching children the wisdom of knowing when to persist versus when to quit. Ultimately, he emphasizes that giving up can lead to newfound freedom and self-discovery.
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Tell Resistance From Mismatch
- Distinguish resistance that precedes pleasure from signs that something is simply not for you.
- Try persisting when resistance promises enjoyment, and give up when you genuinely lack interest.
Fixed Identity Narrows Desire
- Fixing a single identity can reduce anxiety by simplifying desires, but it risks narrowing the self.
- Phillips links such fixed identities to addictions and being undernourished by limited wants.
Experiment To Discover Desires
- Have conversations and run 'experiments in living' to explore conflicting desires.
- Take measured risks to discover what your less inhibited self enjoys.
