Practical Tips for Disciplining Children Who Have Experienced Trauma

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How do you discipline kids who have experienced trauma? We provide 5 tips and then discuss 5 challenging parenting situations. Our expert is Karen Doyle Buckwalter, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Registered Play Therapist and Supervisor, and co-author of "Raising the Challenging Child".

In this episode, we cover:
1.     The Relationship Bank Account

•  Spend effort building your relationship with your child so that you have banked “good will” for when you need to say no or set a firm rule.
•  Ideas for making quick and easy deposits:
  • Praise efforts, successes, helpfulness, their unique essence—big and small.
  • Let the child choose whenever possible.
•  Look for compromises.
• Make more deposits than withdrawals.
• Magic “rule” 5 positive comments to every 1 negative.
  • Difference between making a deposit and spoiling your child.
  • Sideswipe instead of confront. 

2.     Respond to What is Beneath the Behavior

•  Behavior is a reflection of a need. It’s a symptom.
• Strategies for digging deeper into what is underneath the behavior.

3.     Reexamine Your Expectations

• See your child for who she is.

4.     Balancing Structure and Nurture

• How does structure lead to feelings of safety and why is this often misunderstood when parenting children with a history of trauma?
• Choose your battles: choose to ignore some behaviors.

5.     Share Power to Gain Power

Specific Behaviors:

• Tantrum
• Name calling and teasing
• Handle attention seeking behaviors.
• Lying
• Sexualized Behavior and Play

This podcast is produced  by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them. Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:
·         Weekly podcasts
·         Weekly articles/blog posts
·        Resource pages on all aspects of family building 

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review.  This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building