Dealing with Feeling Mattering: How to Feel Valued and Add Value with Jennifer Breheny Wallace
"Feeling like you matter" often gets treated like a nice idea. Something soft. Something optional. In reality, it is a core human need, and when it's missing, the consequences show up everywhere, from disengagement at work to loneliness at home.
Dr. Marc Brackett sits down with journalist and bestselling author Jennifer Breheny Wallace on Dealing With Feeling to talk about what mattering really means, why it's not about ego or achievement, and how everyday interactions quietly shape whether people feel valued and able to add value.
In this conversation:
- What researchers actually mean by "mattering," and why it has two essential parts
- The SAID framework and how it shows up in daily relationships
- Why disengagement is often a sign of pain, not laziness
- How life transitions can collapse our sense of mattering, and how to rebuild it
- Parenting for healthy mattering without tying worth to performance
- Intrinsic vs extrinsic values, and what they do to well-being over time
- Why workplaces that ignore mattering struggle with retention and productivity
About the guest:
Jennifer Breheny Wallace is an award-winning journalist and the author of the New York Times bestselling books Never Enough and Mattering. Her work focuses on achievement culture, connection, and how individuals and institutions can build environments where people feel valued and able to add value.
Connect with Jennifer Breheny Wallace:
Website: https://www.jenniferbwallace.com
Connect with Marc Brackett:
Website: https://marcbrackett.com
Instagram: https://instagram.com/marc.brackett
X: https://x.com/drmarcbrackett
Facebook: https://facebook.com/drmarcbrackett
LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/drmarcbrackett
Dr. Marc Brackett's books:
Explore Marc Brackett's work at the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, where he serves as founding director, and learn more about RULER, an evidence-based, systemic approach to SEL developed at Yale that supports leaders, educators, students, and families in building emotional intelligence and creating healthier school climates.
A special thank you to the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence for supporting this webcast. Thanks also to Oji Life Lab for their generous support. To develop your skills in leadership, emotional intelligence, and more, visit https://ojilifelab.com or click the link in the description of this episode and use promo code DEALINGWITHFEELINGS to save 25%.