Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson The Freeze-Shame Loop, Therapy Speak, and "Everyone Has ADHD": February Mailbag
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Feb 23, 2026 They explore the freeze response and how naming small steps can help shift it. They discuss when psychoeducation creates power imbalances in relationships and how real listening repairs that. They examine rising ADHD-like behaviors, screens versus true ADHD, and attention strategies. They debate the right balance of directness and tenderness in therapy fit.
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Freeze Is An Adaptive Survival Response
- Freeze is a normal, adaptive stress response rather than a moral failing.
- Rick compares freezing to animals' threat response and urges accepting its function before trying to change it.
Use Being With Then Small Steps To Unfreeze
- Be with the freeze first, then work with it; acceptance opens space for change.
- Use naming (I am frozen), tiny physical or mental shifts, and preplanned intervention scripts to budge the state in the moment.
Create A One-Line Intervention Plan
- Make an intervention response plan: visualize a short script for what you'll do next time you freeze.
- Example: notice the freeze, name the self-criticism, then apply a pre-decided tiny action or thought to shift out of it.