The Life of Bryony

Why Women Struggle to Relax: Nicola Jane Hobbs on Burnout, Societal Pressures, and Reclaiming Rest

Jul 28, 2025
In this enlightening conversation, psychologist and author Nicola Jane Hobbs tackles the struggle many women face when it comes to relaxation. She discusses the societal pressures that make rest feel unattainable and how these expectations can lead to chronic stress. Nicola shares practical tools for reclaiming relaxation, emphasizing the importance of unlearning harmful narratives and embracing self-compassion. Through personal anecdotes and actionable strategies, she inspires women to prioritize genuine moments of rest amidst their busy lives.
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INSIGHT

Internalized Beliefs About Rest

  • Women internalize beliefs that rest is lazy, selfish, or must be earned.
  • These beliefs fuel chronic overwork as an unhealthy yet socially accepted coping mechanism.
INSIGHT

Confronting Self When Not Busy

  • Stopping activity leaves us confronted with our raw selves, which is scary and uncomfortable.
  • Relaxation challenges the identity built on busyness and achievement.
ADVICE

Public To-Do List Sharing

  • Share your to-do list publicly to distribute mental load among family members.
  • This action helps reduce burnout by making responsibilities visible and shared.
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