Why Adventure Is a Core Value in Healthy Relationships

What if adventure isn’t something you plan once in a while—but a value you live by in your relationships?

In this episode, I explore adventure as a core value in romantic relationships, especially in long-term, real-life partnerships. Not adventure as thrill-seeking or constant travel, but adventure as curiosity, openness, shared courage, and a willingness to step outside routine—together.

In honor of Valentine’s Day, I start with a question: When was the last time you felt curious in one of your relationships? Because that feeling—oh, this is new—is often where adventure begins.

I share a core values exercise inspired by Dr. Alexandra Solomon, and reflect on what it was like to narrow nearly 90 values down to a top ten for my relationship. One of the biggest takeaways? Adventure isn’t always obvious when it’s missing—but when it’s present, it quietly shapes how connected, alive, and engaged a relationship feels.

Through personal stories—from finishing a 29029 Everesting event, to learning Argentine tango together, to early travel mishaps that could’ve gone very wrong—I talk about what shared adventure adds to a partnership:

• A richer shared story

• A break from autopilot and routine

• New ways of seeing each other

• More laughter (especially when things don’t go as planned)

• Stronger teamwork when things get hard

We also talk about an important truth: adventure can feel scary when you’re doing it alone. Having an adventure partner doesn’t eliminate fear—but it makes it feel manageable. And if you’re choosing someone to build a life with, choosing someone you can step into the unknown with—someone who makes the scary stuff feel more possible—might matter more than we’re taught to believe.

This episode isn’t only about romantic relationships, either. These same ideas apply to your relationship with yourself. When curiosity fades and novelty disappears, it’s often self-connection that suffers first. Inviting adventure back in—through small risks, new experiences, or simply paying closer attention—can be a powerful way to rebuild trust and engagement with your own life, whether you’re partnered or not.

I also share practical ways to invite more adventure into your relationships, including:

• Talking openly about the role you want adventure to play—individually and together

• Supporting each other’s solo adventures as well as shared ones

• Staying flexible and saying yes to unplanned moments

• Being intentional about planning experiences instead of waiting for “someday”

Along the way, I reference a few resources that have shaped how I think about values, intention, and designing a meaningful life:

• Money for Couples, by Ramit Sethi, which explores how couples can design a shared “rich life” based on what matters most to them

• Big Ass Calendar, a planning tool built around scheduling meaningful experiences first—and letting the rest of life fit around them

• Your Journaling Partner, Episode 1, which inspired reflection on intention, awareness, and noticing the adventure that already exists in our lives

Whether you’re partnered, single, parenting, or somewhere in between, this episode is an invitation to think about adventure not as something extreme—but as a way of choosing to stay engaged, curious, and connected.

Because adventure doesn’t have to be dramatic to be meaningful.
Sometimes it’s just choosing to say yes—and not doing it alone.