
The Feminist Dating Show 262. "I feel like my picker is broken." live coaching session
Feb 17, 2026
01:15:38
This one's for you if dating has started to feel like a hamster wheel of painful experiences… and you keep thinking: I've done so much work on myself—why is this still so hard?
In this live session, I coach Quinn through:
- the loop of type vs. essence-based preferences
- the fear of being "too much" in dating
- what to do when uncertainty triggers a full-body spiral
- how to tell if your "picker is broken"… or if you've been trained to assume you're the problem
- self-compassion as a real tool (not a pep talk) to re-regulate and come back home to yourself
- how to update your EBPs so you're not dating someone you have to parent or beg for affection
- community + dating after a big move
By the end, Quinn says it perfectly: this session felt like closing a bunch of tabs in her brain and finally having the system run again.
If you've ever been in the mindset of "it's fate or it's me," I want you to hear this.
Work with Lily:
Read Lily's book: Thank You, More Please
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Explore programs + resources: datebrazen.com
