Martin Keown's cave of whispering desires

Premier League strikers beware - Martin Keown knows how to handle you. Especially you, Romelu.

Marcus, Andy and Pete cast their hive mind over the weekend's action, as Spurs crumble to predictable pieces and Man Utd escape West Ham with all three points. There's also time for an impressive win for Watford, the sorry state at Derby County and a reality check for Messrs Neville and Beckham.

Search ‘Football Ramble’ on social media to find us, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.

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The Football Ramble, the original and best football podcast. Brand new podcasts every single weekday throughout the Premier League season and every day throughout the 2026 FIFA World Cup.

No cliches. No ex-pros like Peter Crouch or The Rest is Football. Just the funniest football conversation out there. Your guardian for the season, daily not weekly. Stick to the Ramble, totally.

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